22 thoughts on “Umikoyami live! sex chats for YOU!”
Take this from a 30yo who has been dating a sea of assholes in her life – a girl best friend is the first red flag đ He is engaging in sexual behaviour with her. Kick him to the curb.
He's a selfish lover and too lazy. He wants to let you do all the work. stop rewarding his selfish behaviour. Either he puts in some effort or you move on to a guy who will
Damn girl, props to you! Sadly some men THINK they want a SAHM/wife but they don't appreciate them once they have them, the grass is always greener is on their minds all the time.
Honey donât lighten your skin because of boys, they are just that boys and not men. Maybe you are hanging with the wrong group of people who are preventing you from meeting your true person.
Thanks for the reply, this has been the most helpful so far. I should make it clear that it's not an expectation on his end that I do anything, he frequently discourages me from doing anything I don't like. Really the only reason it's a problem is because he can't seem to enjoy himself without them and I can't enjoy myself with them. There's definitely kinks we share that maybe we could dive deeper into, or just try some things that are new to both of us, thanks for that idea. The long term plan is honestly we've talked about it at length and both of us want to settle down & have a family together in the next 5-10 years, and other than this issue we work really well together, so I do really want to figure out something that works for us. Thanks again for the reply!
Everyone knows that even an average woman can leave the house and find 50 guys to fu*k before she even makes the letterbox. Her problem is finding one that actually gives a shit about her.
Where as 99% of guys have to actually have some sort of skills to get some play.
If this is not something you really wanted then I would call it a day on whatever is left of the relationship. Don't let her talk you into something that is only of benefit to her.
This is the same age gap my husband and I have. We met at the same ages too.
Like you, I was concerned at first but we've been together 12 years now. We are on the same page for all things, and have open and honest communication. There's no power imbalance, which seems to be one of the major red flags when it comes to ages gaps, so as long as you are both equal in the relationship, I don't think it's weird.
I could be biased since it mirrors my own situation, but if you're both happy, then I think it's worth it to see where it goes.
Itâs not rich at all if youâre in the US. His take home is probably in the low to mid 40s. It sounds like heâs trying to flex or has poor money management cause $12k is more than 25% of his annual take home salary.
Insist on therapy, because this is a real issue that needs to be addressed. The only thing we can pinpoint from this as the potential cause is the dynamic change after you got the other job. As great as that might be in the big picture, it obviously caused a rift in your intimacy, which caused her to check out.
But regardless of what started it, it's a problem, and you can't just leave it be and hope it'll magically be fixed. Don't let her brush it off with “all you think about is sex.” That's gaslighting. Put things into perspective; if she just says that and you let it go, nothing changes. You're here with a dead bedroom and no intimacy. Is that how you want to on-line forever? If not, then you need to press the issue. If nothing changes, then you have a bigger decision to make. Stop focusing on the past. Focus only on the present. Good luck.
I have tendency to do somethings repetitively, it's usually things I do that she doesn't like, mostly when it comes to arguements, or I end up acting like the victim she tells me that all the time, if we have an argument she chalks it up to me acting like the victim, or she tells I'm in the wrong for trying to talk about certain topics
Girl, I'm 28f. I've been in a couple of relationships like this and I stayed way too long. Justifying, letting people mince words, the whole timeline thing, keeping score, put downs, cussing, being cruel, all around letting them treat me like crap.
You can do so much better than this.
That's what helped me end my last abusive relationship and leave with my dignity. I kept telling myself and him “I can do better.” “I deserve better.”
If you wouldn't treat someone like that why in the holy hell would it be ok for you to be treated like that?
No relationship is way way better than a shitty relationship.
Family can sometimes hurt you worse than anyone. I donât blame her for being upset. I had a Grandparent who kept talking about whether or not weâd get an inheritance. I finally got tired of it and said I no interest in what they did with their money as long as the surviving spouse was taken care of. Sure enough, got no inheritance money but I didnât care. We actually had a much better relationship after I said something.
Your GF will probably never feel the same way about her GP again but she shouldnât cut them off. Itâs a sad day when you see clearly the flaws of your parents and grandparents. Sheâs learned a hard lesson but youâre going to end up with your house on your own. Create your own wealth and happiness. Good luck
She continued, how was he supposed to leave? That is why she should have stopped, I'd anything to ease the client's embarrass, not because this nonsensical idea that an involuntary response constitutes harassment.
We do stupid stuff when drunk. No excuse, but if I did something like that, I would definitely expect my wife to rip me a new one, whether I remember doing it or not. I know I would deserve it for disrespecting her and our friend(s).
Hey OP, I make about what your husband makes and my wife is a stay at home wife at the moment. Itâs pretty clear that everyone responding doesnât understand that 200k doesnât magically go as far as they think it does. They mean well, but they really struggle to understand that your household income basically only finances the âluxuriesâ of quality healthcare as needed, funding your retirement, and having a bank account that can save you if something terrible happens.
What are your savings and retirement investments every month? If youâre already maxing our your 401k match and your Roth IRA, then itâs ok to pull back from, say, 20% to 15% in order to get some breathing room (assuming high interest debt is paid off and you have your emergency savings funded).
I get your husband is more logical than emotional. Laying out the difference for him should be relatively straightforward if heâs inclined to compromise and wants the best for you.
Take this from a 30yo who has been dating a sea of assholes in her life – a girl best friend is the first red flag đ He is engaging in sexual behaviour with her. Kick him to the curb.
He's a selfish lover and too lazy. He wants to let you do all the work. stop rewarding his selfish behaviour. Either he puts in some effort or you move on to a guy who will
Damn girl, props to you! Sadly some men THINK they want a SAHM/wife but they don't appreciate them once they have them, the grass is always greener is on their minds all the time.
Honey donât lighten your skin because of boys, they are just that boys and not men. Maybe you are hanging with the wrong group of people who are preventing you from meeting your true person.
I'd that
starting fights over silly things.
dressing better or spending more time in his appearance.
changing his schedule, working longer than usual or working “unnecessary” hour
constantly texting / hiding his phone / being secretive of his phone calls
being constantly stressed.
no intimacy.
hostility towards the partner.
being unreachable
not including you on his free time / friend's gatherings.
Have you noticed any of these behavior?
Run. Flee.
Yes, Pre-K
Thanks for the reply, this has been the most helpful so far. I should make it clear that it's not an expectation on his end that I do anything, he frequently discourages me from doing anything I don't like. Really the only reason it's a problem is because he can't seem to enjoy himself without them and I can't enjoy myself with them. There's definitely kinks we share that maybe we could dive deeper into, or just try some things that are new to both of us, thanks for that idea. The long term plan is honestly we've talked about it at length and both of us want to settle down & have a family together in the next 5-10 years, and other than this issue we work really well together, so I do really want to figure out something that works for us. Thanks again for the reply!
I can't believe you are surprised by this
Everyone knows that even an average woman can leave the house and find 50 guys to fu*k before she even makes the letterbox. Her problem is finding one that actually gives a shit about her.
Where as 99% of guys have to actually have some sort of skills to get some play.
If this is not something you really wanted then I would call it a day on whatever is left of the relationship. Don't let her talk you into something that is only of benefit to her.
I thought about this too, even tho she swore to me that she chose me and she loves only me and that she doesn't want him in her life anymore
This is the same age gap my husband and I have. We met at the same ages too.
Like you, I was concerned at first but we've been together 12 years now. We are on the same page for all things, and have open and honest communication. There's no power imbalance, which seems to be one of the major red flags when it comes to ages gaps, so as long as you are both equal in the relationship, I don't think it's weird.
I could be biased since it mirrors my own situation, but if you're both happy, then I think it's worth it to see where it goes.
Itâs not rich at all if youâre in the US. His take home is probably in the low to mid 40s. It sounds like heâs trying to flex or has poor money management cause $12k is more than 25% of his annual take home salary.
Insist on therapy, because this is a real issue that needs to be addressed. The only thing we can pinpoint from this as the potential cause is the dynamic change after you got the other job. As great as that might be in the big picture, it obviously caused a rift in your intimacy, which caused her to check out.
But regardless of what started it, it's a problem, and you can't just leave it be and hope it'll magically be fixed. Don't let her brush it off with “all you think about is sex.” That's gaslighting. Put things into perspective; if she just says that and you let it go, nothing changes. You're here with a dead bedroom and no intimacy. Is that how you want to on-line forever? If not, then you need to press the issue. If nothing changes, then you have a bigger decision to make. Stop focusing on the past. Focus only on the present. Good luck.
I have tendency to do somethings repetitively, it's usually things I do that she doesn't like, mostly when it comes to arguements, or I end up acting like the victim she tells me that all the time, if we have an argument she chalks it up to me acting like the victim, or she tells I'm in the wrong for trying to talk about certain topics
This is fake. OP has no other posts and hasn't even commented on this post. OP has no comments on any post.
Be strong, you can do this.
Girl, I'm 28f. I've been in a couple of relationships like this and I stayed way too long. Justifying, letting people mince words, the whole timeline thing, keeping score, put downs, cussing, being cruel, all around letting them treat me like crap.
You can do so much better than this.
That's what helped me end my last abusive relationship and leave with my dignity. I kept telling myself and him “I can do better.” “I deserve better.”
If you wouldn't treat someone like that why in the holy hell would it be ok for you to be treated like that?
No relationship is way way better than a shitty relationship.
Family can sometimes hurt you worse than anyone. I donât blame her for being upset. I had a Grandparent who kept talking about whether or not weâd get an inheritance. I finally got tired of it and said I no interest in what they did with their money as long as the surviving spouse was taken care of. Sure enough, got no inheritance money but I didnât care. We actually had a much better relationship after I said something.
Your GF will probably never feel the same way about her GP again but she shouldnât cut them off. Itâs a sad day when you see clearly the flaws of your parents and grandparents. Sheâs learned a hard lesson but youâre going to end up with your house on your own. Create your own wealth and happiness. Good luck
She continued, how was he supposed to leave? That is why she should have stopped, I'd anything to ease the client's embarrass, not because this nonsensical idea that an involuntary response constitutes harassment.
All I can say is actions speak louder than words. So as I said get better for yourself and have no expectations that he will take you back.
We do stupid stuff when drunk. No excuse, but if I did something like that, I would definitely expect my wife to rip me a new one, whether I remember doing it or not. I know I would deserve it for disrespecting her and our friend(s).
Hey OP, I make about what your husband makes and my wife is a stay at home wife at the moment. Itâs pretty clear that everyone responding doesnât understand that 200k doesnât magically go as far as they think it does. They mean well, but they really struggle to understand that your household income basically only finances the âluxuriesâ of quality healthcare as needed, funding your retirement, and having a bank account that can save you if something terrible happens.
What are your savings and retirement investments every month? If youâre already maxing our your 401k match and your Roth IRA, then itâs ok to pull back from, say, 20% to 15% in order to get some breathing room (assuming high interest debt is paid off and you have your emergency savings funded).
I get your husband is more logical than emotional. Laying out the difference for him should be relatively straightforward if heâs inclined to compromise and wants the best for you.
Did you check the number? Contact name couldâve said himself but thatâs easy to manipulate.