MelanieTucker live sex chats for YOU!

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  1. I learned a term recently that might assist you in conceptualising this.

    I've seen people increasingly use the term “sexual harm” to discuss situations such as this – situations where the party who may have tipped into the bounds of SA did so unintentionally because if a factor like miscommunication, misunderstanding, or being unequipped with a rigorous definition of understanding of consent.

    I feel like it allows you to acknowledge any real harm you caused your ex while also not tarring you with the connotations associated with rape – a malicious, selfish arsehole who doesn't care about the victim and is beyond hope of forgiveness. It also allows you to talk about the harm without needing to be defensive for fear of criminalisation.

    Commenters, feel free to add to this or challenge me if I've missed something important here. I just wanted to throw this into the ring in case it was helpful

  2. Hello /u/Top_Bodybuilder6159,

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  3. I would react by affirming his feelings and (if applicable) figuring out what I can do to support him or the relationship whenever he opened up. But my mental state deteriorated a lot from the surgery, and to an extent he was probably protecting me from his own internal monologue.

    Also keep in mind this is his first real, lasting relationship, so he had no experience with dealing with relationship conflict or going through tough times with a partner prior to this episode. So yes, it is believable he has learnt a lot in a short period of time—and I’m incredibly grateful to be with someone who has the self-awareness and care to do that.

    Beating insecurity one step at a time. I have a lot of work to do too that I’ve been developing, a lot of it has to do with self-worth.

  4. You were my only person who replied so I wanted to update cuz a buncha stuff when down. So my Bf and friend were being ride we argued and broke up. And the other dude was kinda 2 faced nice around me a dick around his friends. So I ended up blocking and staying alway for both of them ?

  5. There is NO universe where throwing shit at your partner’s feet warrants a calm response.

    Why advise her to work it out? She’s young; he’s with her at his age and treats her like crap? It’s because older women told him to get lost and she should, too; if he doesn’t know how to behave by now, he never will.

  6. Ha! The gall. She’s ‘sorry you feel this way’! Not that she’s sorry she hasn’t done enough to make you feel appreciated? Wow. You’re not off to a good start. At all.

    First thing to do is to charge her for everything she would charge you with. See how she responds. If that is her ‘love language’, love her with the best spreadsheet known to man.

  7. I went through something similar. My step daughters mom wanted her to take on her step father's last name so they all matched. Despite her bio dad (my husband) paying CS and having regular visitation. We outright refused and it's good we did cause a year later they were divorced and now my step daughter hardly sees her ex step father/ mom's ex.

    Tell her to let the kid get older and decide for himself. Also another option is to hyphenate like old last name- your last name.

    Regardless though. So many families are blended now and she's putting away to much thought into the value of a name. Nobody notices or even cares. But his dad's feelings should be considered not just hers!

  8. She’s playing a fine line there and I wouldn’t trust her. The reason is because the fact she won’t nip the relationship in the bud tells me she feels a little invested emotionally there. If you’ve asked her to stop doing that and she refuses to 10 months is not that long I would let her go. It’s not worth it if you read some of these reddits on here of the horrific things that happen. You could save yourself a lot of harm by just letting her go.

  9. My guy you’re being used. Find a new girlfriend who isn’t an entitled, spoiled, materialistic brat.

  10. And he seems quite emotionally reliant on her so it may be a good break for him to focus on himself as well

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