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I’m not insulting her for those things if I had a problem I would stop funding it. I’m just acknowledging that she likes doing these things whenever she wants and raising a baby is one of the most time consuming task. An I don’t want her to have any regret.
I don’t think it’s realistic to avoid important topics with your partner. I also don’t think it’s realistic to continue to pursue a relationship with someone you disagree with on fundamental issues or someone who is so comfortable disregarding your lived experiences.
My husband was in a similar situation with me.
Part of it was also Covid and the places we decided to on-line. I met him in a country that i visited at the time, far away from where I grew up in and stayed there for him. Then we moved back to his home country, even farther away from my home. I did not like both places and learned to speak up for myself recently on where I see myself living, he agreed after many conversations, so we‘re in the process of moving now.
Also during Covid I was not working and then the internet kind of sucked us all in.
I think it sounds like she‘s depressed. Or she lost the believe in herself. Something is definitely going on with her. She‘s a little lost here.
I would guess her response is to search for answers live! because she can‘t figure out her purpose in life.
Did you ask her where she sees herself in a couple of years? Do you guys want to have children? Is the PCOS affecting it?
In general I would just start out with kind, non accusing and non judgemental questions to find out what the root cause is here. If you can just listen to her with patience to get to the bottom of the block that she experiences. You can help her by just listening to her and help her with her emotions which is more effective than providing her with materialistic things right now like cars and laptops.
Maybe having regular open conversations will improve you guys connection, help you to get to know her better and she has someone to share her worries with. Just being able to open her soul and talk about internal problems to you might open doors for her to get motivated again in life. I think she will be grateful to be able to open up to you without the fear of disappointing you.
Also while communicating try not to fix or change her. Just hear her out patiently.
Then I would just start giving her many compliments during the day (that target her internal qualities, not looks)
Like you are so smart, talented, etc. I admire your strength…
Try to do this for a couple of weeks and see if it helps.
That might help her too to reestablish believe in herself. And builds up her self worth.
If nothing helps then couple‘s counseling could help too.
You can always not participate in that dynamic.
You can always not participate in that dynamic.
Uh huh. Good partners don't verbally abused their partners for one bad night of heavy drinking.
Yoga is good at hitting all the muscles of the hips/glutes.
First of all, you're not “selling out”. Having a baby is not about belonging to a group or a tribe, it's about what you truly want.
You're absolutely right that hormones and societal pressure in the 30s can hit really nude. The only thing you can do is, instead of framing this “I'm a sellout” (to whom?), “Logically”, etc.., try to really explore how you feel. The use of the word “logically” a few times strikes me as you trying to push down your feelings. Maybe it's the fear of missing out? Maybe it's being without children when you're older? That's the only way for you to really figure out what you want. Good luck!
Dodged a bullet there sweetiwn
Do not take her back when she comes back.
i literally stated that i’m a male in my early twenties. i was just trying to state what i think those 30 year old men are thinking when going for younger women. that’s all.
So it took her 7 months to tell you & she didn't think getting a rape kit done was a good idea or tested for std's that could have been passed to you…
Either she was raped & then put your sexual heath at risk. Or she wasn't raped & this is to relieve her guilt. Neither is good tbh.
If he's still dating you, it just sounds like he's bi and trying to figure himself out. Though he's not really doing a good job at respecting the relationship while doing that if he has Grindr on his phone still.
I'm not sure why you're so persistent about him being gay when there's more than just being gay or straight.
Project harder? I’ve had the same job for severe years and my bosses know my partner well. We have team building events all year and some of them are open to the family.
There’s a ton of reasons to be on a first name basis with someone’s boss without is being about him needing to control her.
Thank you! Given my career path he will probably always make more than me, so it’s something I’ll have to get used to! Creating a budget is a great idea.
This is a good idea
You're 26, she is 23.
Seems life is gonna teach a few new and unpleasant things to her.
Alone.
Some people just don't like the attention with stuff like this. My mum died when I was 22 and her friends and my aunties are always on Facebook on the anniversary of her death. I don't like it. I grieve privately and keep my thoughts to myself.
Grief is a personal thing. We all do it differently. He most likely values you as an anchor to a world outside of his grief.
Whether you decide to retain a lawyer or not you really should at least seek advice from one ASAP and listen to what they tell you even if it is not what you want to hear. You need find out what your rights and obligations are and what they could be in the future. The cost for a few consultations is far less than the cost of making ill informed choices can bring to you.
LOVE IS NOT ENOUGH.
Why do you entertain this behavior? Why are you torturing yourself trying to convince him that your definition of cheating is more accurate than his? I’m exhausted for you.
You’re entitled to your own definition of what constitutes cheating and he keeps crossing your boundaries. Break up and hold out for someone whose values are more aligned with yours.
Many men suffer because they are afraid to show emotion.
Tbh it seems OP is doing this, it doesn't read like they are comfortable showing emotions at all
I do not like to open up to people about my feelings and things like that, its just not how i like to process my emotions or whatever.
I'm thinking they're projecting some of this onto their SO instead of properly talking about it
!remindme 2 weeks
The sake of the kids excuse is used by adults who don't want to take actual responsibility for their actions or for actions they need to take…kids aren't stupid….you are wealthy, give them the best care possible…if you decide to divorce just make sure you give them the best treatment/therapy to cope with it and make sure you don't do anything stupid to change that…be honest with yourself as well as your kids
60 hrs a week is not sustainable. The issue isn’t working from home vs not, it’s having a job that doesn’t take up your entire life and force you to work overtime regularly.
She is asking him to work 40 hrs a week on a normal schedule.
YOU need to grow up and realize work isn’t life.
Dump this trash pile. If he had a great heart he wouldn’t be saying such disgusting things. Especially telling a vulnerable teenager that they should end themselves. Damn. He goes on the attack at any hint of “disrespect”. He needs to get over himself. Why doesn’t his family hold him responsible for his repulsive behaviour?
I don't have any advice because you're in a super shitty situation due to someone else's selfish actions and no one deserves this. Also, seriously, fuck you, Bryan.
Is he comparing you to his tightly gripped hand?
Also weight does not, as far as I know, change the size of your vagina.
You can’t convince him.
You say that this is the second time your issues have caused a breakup, so he’s already given you a second chance.
No one gets a third.
So deal with the fact that you screwed up, that your reaction, while perfectly understandable, was a little overblown in this scenario.
You need therapy to help you deal with the trauma of your past.