You and your friends are disgusting. You are witnessing and perpetuating abuse. The fact that you think that that’s okay because it’s just “minding your own business” is so so gross. Your boyfriend is absolutely right in every way. I would NEVER stay with my boyfriend if he was friends with an abuser. Do better.
Some people think so lowly of themselves that when someone shows interest in them they think less of the person for liking you and consider them to have “bad taste” I struggled with that for a really long time I would go from totally crushing on someone to not wanting to be around them as soon as they liked me. You deserve love and to be happy maybe therapy could help get you to a place where you can allow yourself to be loved by someone and yourself
Years ago, like, a lot of years, I had a boyfriend who talked to me about a dream he had for two hours. I am still mad about it. I would not tolerate a monologue at all. Tell him to start a podcast.
Besides the fact that you can break up with anyone for any reason you want, and your friends shouldn’t judge you for that, it is a pretty damn good reason.
Block the ex and the friends and keep being awesome.
I definitely have and have tried to soften my approach/stop stressing as a result.
I'm frankly struggling to be a successful father as well and I want the best for my boys, but in my mind I have not done well despite my best intentions. They are good boys, I just wanted to do more for them.
It’s interesting that you point that out because it’s a big issue for the autistic community. I often see posts where a person’s behavior is declared as “weaponized incompetence” but it’s really based on the assumption that the situation is the same for each person and that’s just not true. I am autistic, and even though I’m very capable, some things are simply a lot harder for me than they are for most people. Hell there are many things that I can do most of the time but can’t do sometimes. That’s just how it is, and I’m glad that my spouse is understanding and I extend that understanding to him as well.
Now to be clear, he should absolutely be open to OP’s feedback about this and to learn coping strategies, and if he doesn’t she should move on because it sounds like she’s fed up. Neurodivergence may be the reason he’s experiencing these problems, but if OP’s needs are not being met in the relationship she shouldn’t stay in it.
This is a deal breaker for me. I would 100% leave my husband if he felt sorry for his mom and had her move into a bedroom in our home. I don't get along with her for the most part. We are cordial, but this is absolutely never going to happen.
I will work several extra jobs if my mom ever needed help. Get her an apartment or tiny house near here. That's what I would do for my mom. (She is unable to work, so that is a different story.)
Nothing good for you gf had to go, you need to be a parent and that means you have to deal with ex as much as required.
Tell her because you owe it to her. This is so disgusting.
You and your friends are disgusting. You are witnessing and perpetuating abuse. The fact that you think that that’s okay because it’s just “minding your own business” is so so gross. Your boyfriend is absolutely right in every way. I would NEVER stay with my boyfriend if he was friends with an abuser. Do better.
Some people think so lowly of themselves that when someone shows interest in them they think less of the person for liking you and consider them to have “bad taste” I struggled with that for a really long time I would go from totally crushing on someone to not wanting to be around them as soon as they liked me. You deserve love and to be happy maybe therapy could help get you to a place where you can allow yourself to be loved by someone and yourself
I'm beginning to see that, thank you for your support!
You are 1000% the problem here.
Years ago, like, a lot of years, I had a boyfriend who talked to me about a dream he had for two hours. I am still mad about it. I would not tolerate a monologue at all. Tell him to start a podcast.
Maybe it hurts because he’s fucking her against her will.
Sorry to hear that. Hope it gets better
Besides the fact that you can break up with anyone for any reason you want, and your friends shouldn’t judge you for that, it is a pretty damn good reason.
Block the ex and the friends and keep being awesome.
Therapy for your anxiety and low self esteem issues.
I definitely have and have tried to soften my approach/stop stressing as a result.
I'm frankly struggling to be a successful father as well and I want the best for my boys, but in my mind I have not done well despite my best intentions. They are good boys, I just wanted to do more for them.
It’s interesting that you point that out because it’s a big issue for the autistic community. I often see posts where a person’s behavior is declared as “weaponized incompetence” but it’s really based on the assumption that the situation is the same for each person and that’s just not true. I am autistic, and even though I’m very capable, some things are simply a lot harder for me than they are for most people. Hell there are many things that I can do most of the time but can’t do sometimes. That’s just how it is, and I’m glad that my spouse is understanding and I extend that understanding to him as well.
Now to be clear, he should absolutely be open to OP’s feedback about this and to learn coping strategies, and if he doesn’t she should move on because it sounds like she’s fed up. Neurodivergence may be the reason he’s experiencing these problems, but if OP’s needs are not being met in the relationship she shouldn’t stay in it.
I’m going to try and talk to him tonight about it as best I can without making things worse.
You are 100% right.
I assume you live! with adults? Because the problem right now is not a roommate, but the roommate's kid. Why can´t you take your FWB to yur place?
File for Divorce
This is a deal breaker for me. I would 100% leave my husband if he felt sorry for his mom and had her move into a bedroom in our home. I don't get along with her for the most part. We are cordial, but this is absolutely never going to happen.
I will work several extra jobs if my mom ever needed help. Get her an apartment or tiny house near here. That's what I would do for my mom. (She is unable to work, so that is a different story.)