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I was going to Alanon the first time, before we broke up. It helped me tremendously and is part of the reason I was able cut the cord back then. This time, we only reconnected 3 months ago and I can see this is not healthy and he has not worked any steps (he doesn't believe in AA, he used a private counsellor) or dealt with the things that cause him to drink. I owe that to Alanon too. I guess if nothing else, i can be thankful I listened to my gut and am picking up on the signs now rather than 4 years from now. I ended it last night after some more questionable behavior from him that lead me to believe he is either cheating again, or is a dry drunk.
I was going to Alanon the first time, before we broke up. It helped me tremendously and is part of the reason I was able cut the cord back then. This time, we only reconnected 3 months ago and I can see this is not healthy and he has not worked any steps (he doesn't believe in AA, he used a private counsellor) or dealt with the things that cause him to drink. I owe that to Alanon too. I guess if nothing else, i can be thankful I listened to my gut and am picking up on the signs now rather than 4 years from now. I ended it last night after some more questionable behavior from him that lead me to believe he is either cheating again, or is a dry drunk.