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You mean to tell me you're having suicidal thoughts over a child that is unborn and you haven't stopped to think about the children you already do have?
Please if you can't go through with an abortion then don't. If you think you can leave 2 kids behind because you're putting a man's want above your mental needs you really shouldn't be a parent. Im sorry but your KIDS come before any dick. You are 17 years older than I am and I can't believe you honestly thought a spermicide was the only birth control option available to you and that it would work everytime. Get on the pill or make him wear a fkn condom.
You will need to teach your children this information at one stage, I suggest you start educating yourself to teach them correctly in the future.
I take it you are a female?
Take the engagement if you want but no marry marry until at minimum a yr goes by.
THANK YOU!!!! I just exited a relationship where I was dealing with this. I cannot tell you how much I needed to hear this while I was dealing with it. Your body is not an apology and no one is entitled to it.
THANK YOU!!!! I just exited a relationship where I was dealing with this. I cannot tell you how much I needed to hear this while I was dealing with it. Your body is not an apology and no one is entitled to it.
Dump him
Bruh
Part of growing up is realizing that some long term friends end up being toxic people. You should not set yourself on fire to save her. She is actually trying to sabotage you. It’s done, let her go.
I think you really need to keep working with your therapist on this, possibly with more frequent visits or longer sessions of possible. Your fear of abandonment is stepping over his boundaries and the only real way to stop doing that is to work with someone on changing that behavior. Ask your therapist if they know DBT (Dialectical behavior therapy) techniques where you learn self soothing and emotional regulation techniques.
His mother needs to stop making this about her and arrange some visits.
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i care about my wife a great deal – we are always out doing things – she wants to go away for weekend i get up and take her, she wants to go to pictures we go – she wanted to go away a few weeks ago we went – i text my girl “got stuff on” and i went away for weekend so yes i do a lot for my wife to keep her happy.
You're only ever responsible for your own actions. No way to control the actions of someone else.
Break up and let a close friend or family member of hers know what's going on. That way people know that she's going to need some observation, and that she's threatened to commit suicide. Close friend is a better call if her family is unaware of the mental health stuff.
Do what you can, but you have 0 control in this situation. You'll have to let the chips fall where they may.
I've said before that the only reason I brought up my friends situation is to say i wished my boyfriend was more supportive like our friend. Also he said if I am pregnant and keep the baby he wouldn't leave me. I have no idea how all of you people turned “I'd rather you have an abortion” into “if you don't have an abortion I'm leaving you”
Get the paternity test, and be wise, do not ever have more than one baby with a man looking for excuses to have one foot out the door and mistreats you. No more babies.
I take no pleasure saying this but I think you know deep down this relationship isn’t lasting the 20 years it takes to raise babies you are barely getting through this because he’s so awful and you’re at your wits end. Any extra kids is you raising them alone and having even less resources.
You can’t do anything about him but you can do everything about you
UpdateMe!
Stop this nonsense right now and get a paternity test
“put ink under your skin or i will be angered”
?♂️ who knows. People make shit up here all the time. Still, you going to leave him now? Since everyone has the same “vibe”.
This needs to be a discussion, not an argument. You will need to be able to have calm financial discussions with each other for the rest of your lives (or marriage).
My BF is the same, it's pretty frustrating to hear him take a monotone voice and “recite” the protocol. It makes me feel like a chore. I think that your wife should be more understanding that you come from far but also I very much understand her frustration.
First: if you can afford it, go to therapy, you can only gain from it.
2nd: try asking her before conflicts arises “what would help you feel better when these situations happen” sometimes just asking someone “do you want a solution or to vent?” “Would a hug help?” Makes a huuuge difference. It's not because you don't acknowledge the situation/issue that it will go away.
3rd: she needs to learn to self-sooth and not rely exclusively on you to bring herself back in her window of tolerance.
4th: establish a word that mean “I'm overwhelmed too, I can't help you right now” because you are allowed to feel like you can't help.
5th: find healthy relationships that you can model after. Or try and notice how your gf give comfort to people when they need it, that can provide insight on how she'd like to receive comfort.
Annnnnd, that's all I can think of right now.
Good luck
Really out here gatekeeping therapy
Of course, they are “your” friends and families. Comparing to a total stranger, they are most likely to be on your side.
Honestly, if he is being this intensive about you working your butt off, is he really worth keeping around?
I'm curious why this is a distinction for you.
Is one situation better than another? I mean besides the obvious financial situation. I'm struggling to understand what the difference is in these two examples on a relationship level.
Yoooo! That was a straight up Copperhead in the garden. Cut. That. Snake. OUT. Maaaan, the religious folks I know would say that’s a straight up Jezebel. Get that thot gawn! You did good standing up for what‘s right. Your family is worth more than a “good time”. That girl’s got damage if she thinks insinuating herself like that is healthy. She’s a damaged predator. What can you do? How do you warn your community without being “a Karen”? Haha
I’m hoping to mediate somehow, but I’ve confirmed my suspicions that my girlfriend is in the right here.
No reply, just block.
And once again your mother has been betrayed by the people she loved the most.
You are both stressed. Buying a house is a really stressful time and then to lose your job and find it hot to get another one.
I’d wait till he is calm and reiterate that you are doing your best. Ask what he suggests you do that you haven’t done. My suggestion would be agency work. Even if you only get a couple of days a week it’s still something and it pays well and can lead to full time or at least give you contacts. And I would also expect him to apologise without prompting. Otherwise I’d reconsider the relationship
Reddit doctors strike again
I don’t understand how he thought he was being offered the new job. I would think that at the end of the interview, he would have been told the next steps. Especially at a big company. Curious what they actually said to him, & what he heard.
Even if the new company hadn’t yet heard of his outburst, him calling & acting like he had the job after one interview would make them stop & recognize he has issues. Pretty bad that they had to explain to him they hadn’t made him an offer.
Forget the old job. They can’t take him back. Throwing the monitor & papers was violent & destroying company property. Multiple people calling security shows that his coworkers must have been scared. He does need to sincerely apologize & offer to pay for the monitor, but if he still thinks that outburst was funny, he won’t do that. I’m torn if he had a breakdown or is just a jerk.
You should be receiving his health insurance termination info soon. As soon as you do, go to the Healthcare.gov marketplace. Losing work coverage is a qualifying event to enroll. Sorry you’re going through all of this, OP.
Personally I don't like my wife having my reddit, but to be honest I don't like anyone that knows me to know that.
Other than that I am not only okay with her having my social media, but like it. Idk why she's hiding it from you, sounds like a red flag dawg.
Can you think of any alterior motive on why she married you or was it clearly for love? The whole thing seems suspicious.
Somethings up
Type the usernames you know in to here and see what comes up: whatsmyname.app
For sure. The second affair is so much easier than the first, too. So, good luck with that.
Remindme! 1 week
No it's not. This is not acceptable. Your partner doesn't even stand up for you. He thinks less of you than his sexist asshole dad. He will put you through way more of this in the future. I'm sorry you have to go through this but this a very toxic situation to be in, especially for the kid later on.
Fantasy and role play versus reality are two very different acts. Enjoying porn together does not mean you want to have sex with the porn star you are watching, or even would have sex with that guy you a watching if you met him in real life. The same goes for your bf and threesomes. I wouldn't worry about it.
That he may have had those….
…. because he is A MAN….
…and YOU as a woman with the exact SAME people could have had a totally bad experience doesnt cross his spirit once.
Sorry, that's being voluntarily stupid and inconsiderate.
Also: it's one thing to pick up one girl and bring her to the next town as a woman. (If she was placed next to the road as a bait, one may already be done for at that moment!)
It's a totally different story to pick up several people. Or a man. And take them with you for showers.
Being kind had taken it's toll on you.
Stick to your guns! He is really stupid and naive if he thinks that all hikers are good people and needs should get a ride.
Sorry, but wanting something in live involves being granted that whish since when?
Did he got stuck at Woodstock 1968?
I can only go with the info you give, and you said nothing about having a conversation with her about the things that bother you. You also didn’t answer my question about a third party
No need to get defensive – I didn’t say you were the ‘bad guy’, I just answered your question. Which is that there’s no way she won’t be devastated. The best thing you can do is tell her the truth.
yes you're toxic
It’s not on going for 2 years. That’s how long I’ve know her. But the feelings have been lurking for a few months
20s going after 15-16s are not protected by any R&J law I've ever seen.
What do you see as the future of this relationship?
Nah she's in the wrong for that.
All you did was point out hypocrisy in how people potray themselves.
And then she took a shot at your mother, whoa situation isn't even remotely close to the subject.
Me personally I wouldn't let that slide, but the balls in your court on how to proceed from this disrespect
I forgot about referring to a person as a puke like a noun as an insult. It rules and I thank you for the reminder