25 thoughts on “Meloddymel live! sex chats for YOU!”
I understand what you mean and I stated that directly to him. That I felt it was fair to do something HE wanted to do.I didn't state specifically I wanted to connect with him through his hobby of choice as both of our hobbies are very similar. I did say I would gladly go along, and just tell me and it feels like some sort of mental game at this point.
Some of the other commenters are speculating that he's either gay or bi. I'm not going to bother trying to assign a label. There's no way to be sure what's really going on in his mind and it's a pointless exercise in hair-splitting anyway. Who cares if he's “really” straight if he's going to keep doing what he's doing? He should have told you earlier about the lingerie and the toys. That might be an issue one could tolerate, but posting videos of himself on an adult website, also without telling you, seems like a deal breaker to me. He's going to keep doing it, regardless of what he tells you. If you aren't willing to tolerate that (and I wouldn't if I were you), then get an annulment if you can, otherwise a divorce, and don't waste any time trying to analyze whether he's “really” straight, or gay, or bi, or something else.
You don't mention finances, but if your finances are mingled with his in any way (joint bank accounts, joint tenancy etc.), make sure you protect your finances ASAP. You don't want him destroying your credit rating on the way out the door.
Getting angry about it is pretty extreme. No one can monitor where someone else's eye go. Seems like a control issue she needs to resolve. Maybe something happened in a previous relationship that she carried into yours.
You sound like you both would be happier if you were not in this relationship with each other. Just because you think you love someone doesn’t mean they will make you happy. If all you are going to do is on-line in the past then you can never have any hope for a happier tomorrow.
90 percent of people giving advice in this sub do not on-line in the real world and it shows when they express certain takes that primarily exist on reddit
It's been 2 months and he still isn't sure about a label? Give me a break. He's delusional if he thinks that at his age people are going to be willing to wait around for him to decide when or if he's ready to make the relationship “official”. His interest means nothing without his commitment and you're well within reason to wanna date other people. It's not manipulation, it's a boundary. He doesn't have to call you his girlfriend but he also doesn't get to have boyfriend privileges then.
To be fair, around a couple of weeks into our relationship he did end his friendship with her, I just can’t understand how he didn’t realise he had feelings?
There isn’t a solution if you believe the age difference is too big and already say he’s too old for you. You can’t make him younger and you can’t age yourself.
You just have to decide what matters more to you, your relationship to him or what society/your parents/other people think of the age gap. Going to be honest, a 17 year age gap when you’re 20 years old will most likely yield judgment.
You’re not done developing your adult brain and he’s almost double your age. There’s a reason people don’t really approve of big age differences when one party is still quite young. The difference in life experience is huge. He’s been through his youth when you’re just starting out your adult life.
If someone I was in a committed relationship got plastic surgery without telling me, I would be absolutely furious. And not because of any money issues. Yes it's their body and their choice but I would expect them to tell me. (Though I'm not sure how big a procedure this was if you didn't notice.)
You shouldn't have to talk to a grown ass man about his hygiene. You're 21, do you really want to be stuck in a relationship without sex, without fun, without love, with a smelly dude?
Get out, and find someone with at least some basic hygiene and sex drive.
He's clearly not mature enough to handle adult situations and he straight-up raped you by ejaculating inside without consent or use of protection.
You're not out of line here at all, and for him to leave you hanging during such a stressful moment should show you where you are in his list of priorities. No offense, but he's a jerk.
I think you are going to have to put it in the past, just like the previous events of the divorce. If you want this to be a new beginning or chapter he is moving in on, then you have to do your part and really make it a new chapter.
People aren’t perfect, sometimes they lie when they get scared, but you were happy that he’s finally become the man you needed, and he is happy that all the struggles of sobriety and self improvement has finally brought you back to him.
I know it sucks to be lied to, but it sounds like all he’s done is tried to do anything he could to work his way back to you and the time he lost you sounds like it is his biggest regret. He likely only involved himself with other women because he just wanted to feel human for a few moments, instead of guilty and like a failure.
I think you need to start telling yourself ‘that was then and this is now’ whenever you feel like crying and hold back your tears to enjoy the moment of a lot of time, and effort, with very hot work, because that’s what it took to be together again and I don’t think you should waste this chance because of loneliness and letters.
I understand what you mean and I stated that directly to him. That I felt it was fair to do something HE wanted to do.I didn't state specifically I wanted to connect with him through his hobby of choice as both of our hobbies are very similar. I did say I would gladly go along, and just tell me and it feels like some sort of mental game at this point.
Some of the other commenters are speculating that he's either gay or bi. I'm not going to bother trying to assign a label. There's no way to be sure what's really going on in his mind and it's a pointless exercise in hair-splitting anyway. Who cares if he's “really” straight if he's going to keep doing what he's doing? He should have told you earlier about the lingerie and the toys. That might be an issue one could tolerate, but posting videos of himself on an adult website, also without telling you, seems like a deal breaker to me. He's going to keep doing it, regardless of what he tells you. If you aren't willing to tolerate that (and I wouldn't if I were you), then get an annulment if you can, otherwise a divorce, and don't waste any time trying to analyze whether he's “really” straight, or gay, or bi, or something else.
You don't mention finances, but if your finances are mingled with his in any way (joint bank accounts, joint tenancy etc.), make sure you protect your finances ASAP. You don't want him destroying your credit rating on the way out the door.
Yea, you need to leave before you end up in an ER.
Getting angry about it is pretty extreme. No one can monitor where someone else's eye go. Seems like a control issue she needs to resolve. Maybe something happened in a previous relationship that she carried into yours.
Was the strip club visit planned or unplanned?
Throw him in the nearest waste bin. He is trash.
It’s important that you don’t pretend you don’t know this.
You know she isn’t all that into you. You KNOW it now.
You honestly can’t have a happy ending with this woman.
You sound like you both would be happier if you were not in this relationship with each other. Just because you think you love someone doesn’t mean they will make you happy. If all you are going to do is on-line in the past then you can never have any hope for a happier tomorrow.
90 percent of people giving advice in this sub do not on-line in the real world and it shows when they express certain takes that primarily exist on reddit
Ma’am you did not pick a winner as a bf
It's been 2 months and he still isn't sure about a label? Give me a break. He's delusional if he thinks that at his age people are going to be willing to wait around for him to decide when or if he's ready to make the relationship “official”. His interest means nothing without his commitment and you're well within reason to wanna date other people. It's not manipulation, it's a boundary. He doesn't have to call you his girlfriend but he also doesn't get to have boyfriend privileges then.
To be fair, around a couple of weeks into our relationship he did end his friendship with her, I just can’t understand how he didn’t realise he had feelings?
There isn’t a solution if you believe the age difference is too big and already say he’s too old for you. You can’t make him younger and you can’t age yourself.
You just have to decide what matters more to you, your relationship to him or what society/your parents/other people think of the age gap. Going to be honest, a 17 year age gap when you’re 20 years old will most likely yield judgment.
You’re not done developing your adult brain and he’s almost double your age. There’s a reason people don’t really approve of big age differences when one party is still quite young. The difference in life experience is huge. He’s been through his youth when you’re just starting out your adult life.
“when we meet next time”
There shouldn't be a “next time”, ever
If someone I was in a committed relationship got plastic surgery without telling me, I would be absolutely furious. And not because of any money issues. Yes it's their body and their choice but I would expect them to tell me. (Though I'm not sure how big a procedure this was if you didn't notice.)
Wow.
Any minute now he is going to let slip that he is getting married to his steer.
She probably “worked from home” that day.
You break up with him, that's what you do.
You shouldn't have to talk to a grown ass man about his hygiene. You're 21, do you really want to be stuck in a relationship without sex, without fun, without love, with a smelly dude?
Get out, and find someone with at least some basic hygiene and sex drive.
Leave him.
He's clearly not mature enough to handle adult situations and he straight-up raped you by ejaculating inside without consent or use of protection.
You're not out of line here at all, and for him to leave you hanging during such a stressful moment should show you where you are in his list of priorities. No offense, but he's a jerk.
How are you 25 and believing the absolute bullshit she’s selling you?
I think you are going to have to put it in the past, just like the previous events of the divorce. If you want this to be a new beginning or chapter he is moving in on, then you have to do your part and really make it a new chapter.
People aren’t perfect, sometimes they lie when they get scared, but you were happy that he’s finally become the man you needed, and he is happy that all the struggles of sobriety and self improvement has finally brought you back to him.
I know it sucks to be lied to, but it sounds like all he’s done is tried to do anything he could to work his way back to you and the time he lost you sounds like it is his biggest regret. He likely only involved himself with other women because he just wanted to feel human for a few moments, instead of guilty and like a failure.
I think you need to start telling yourself ‘that was then and this is now’ whenever you feel like crying and hold back your tears to enjoy the moment of a lot of time, and effort, with very hot work, because that’s what it took to be together again and I don’t think you should waste this chance because of loneliness and letters.
Now that’s actually helpful advice
Your girlfriend is an asshole.
Spoiler alert, life is about to be so much more fun.
Please break up with him. Neither of you deserve to be miserable forever. Breaking up before all the money is spent on wedding and…possibly children.
Learn who YOU are!