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OP, so sorry your parents failed you so spectacularly.
Why don't you look for a job around where your Mum and grandparents live!?
You've done so well rurning your luck around and getting trained for a good profession. You are so much stronger than you think! Well done.
There is plenty of great advice in the comments. Do all of that, too. Journal, distance yourself from the crush-dude, develop more social connections via hobbies, volunteering, pub etc. But also think about moving.
Best of luck! Hope you manage to wean yourself off this person who currently takes up too much of your mental and emotional space.
I trust him going on gut
She’s being a dumb bitch so I’d say that you should continue being a good brother and do your best to support your sister’s hygiene. Don’t be with someone who has no compassion for your family or concept of what the disabled have to go through. Tell her to fuck off. You’re a saint, I’d be extremely angry