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59 thoughts on “Tyraa-love live webcams for YOU!”
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Leave her. Let the dildo financially and emotionally support her
Yeah that's what I'm thinking, because honestly I still really love him, but I do not want him to stay with me just for the baby.
Sure say yes but don’t get married right away wait 2 yrs at least while living together as much as y’all maybe interested in each other you still need time to work on yourself ( I’m experiencing it currently on the sour end
Mostly the answer is no.
There are a ton of replies saying yes, I have female friends etc.. they may be being honest but the vast majority of men are not interested in friendship with women without sex.
Nope that's like those couples who throw around the divorce card just to hurt you
When your mom spends time with you, invite your dad’s sister. Or if she wants to know what you and your husband are doing tell her you’re going to the book club. Maybe if she experiences these things with you she will realize that other things can be fun too. She seems to be codependent on you right now.
This is an incredibly complex issue that's probably been going on since the beginning of time, but I notice two points in your complaint:
1) you gain these male friends who you 'friendzone' – and by that I mean you determine early on that you aren't interested in a relationship with them and you tell them that which is totally fine and establishing good boundaries,
2) you then go on to mention that you DO in fact find male friends who you are interested in, but reject you (do they establish boundaries the way you do?) – again this is totally fine, relationships development organically and unless it is a purely physical attraction, you probably built up interest over time
Now I'm going to make a couple assumptions, I'm going to assume all these male friends aren't complete animals and aren't befriending you from day 1 just to try and bed you,
my second assumption (because you mention attractiveness) is that you aren't so drop dead gorgeous that you don't get very many of the men in my first assumption, not in a cruel way (I hope) as there is a big difference between someone who is beautiful but not the top 0.1% you see in supermodels and celebrities.
I've had friends complain of something very similar to this before and the way I always phrase it is that in any romantically or sexually compatible relationships, there is almost always going to be a level above friendship because building a good friendship builds a foundation for a romantic/sexual relationship, getting to know you personally (along with your attractiveness) will cause these men to 'fall in love with you' as you put it, even if they didnt really intend to from the beginning. Very similar to how you have some guy friends you end up wanting to date.
Now obviously there will be exceptions to this, you will have some friends that are animals and only went after your looks from the beginning, they weren't ever real friends (or at least not very nice ones)
There is also a bit of a biological component to this, as humans we should be much more evolved and men are disgusting and all that, in general we are sorry and we don't mean to be as bad as we are, but also:
In nature, the females of the species always want the best mate because they can only reproduce once over a given time period and so are much more selective, while males are typically more hardwired to mate as much as possible because they can reproduce as many times as they can find females who will let them, which causes all sorts of unevolved behaviour from us (again we are sorry, we don't mean to be idiots most of the time)
What happens here is that when your guy friends reach a certain level of friendship they are more likely to want to give in to that desire for a relationship with you, and our monkey brains take that wonderful friendship+sex and turn it into feelings of love,
One the other hand, you are less likely to unlock that monkey brain desire with any of your guy friends because you are more selective and simply have higher standards, which leads to this conflict you keep having.
Honestly I imagine you will keep having this problem, but you will slowly start collecting friends who resolve this monkey brain conflict and will still want a friendship with you and even a nice platonic love without all that other messy business, we normally start getting less feral around the mid 20's mark but it's not set in stone.
Obviously I can't get aware from the fact that there are some vicious pigs out there with no self control, and I don't speak for them at all because I like to think I dont count myself among them, and I have tried explaining this from my point of view and have no clue on the issues women face on the daily,
Tldr: men are like your pet dog that humps you because he's happy to see you and you scratch behind his ears, we are sorry and don't mean it, we are just stupid
It's a slippery slope. Some part of you has to feel like this is also a way of evening the score. My suggestion…don't do that.
Either you're all in or you're out in trying to fix the relationship. You already know how you feel about this other guy. Now your decisions from here on out will reflect what your true intentions are.
I genuinely hope that you are in a position to safely leave this person.
You freely acknowledge that you are pressured into doing A LOT that you're not comfortable with just so that he won't be angry at you.
If your best friend had this issue, what would you advise them???
My very real advice; if you're not living together, end the relationship. If you are, please set up something somewhere that you can go to and protect yourself.
He genuinely sounds like the worst kind of predator and is grooming you.
Hope she finds better
Thanks. That’s how I felt, I didn’t know the timeline was so soon or that her last thing was that serious (she had described that setup as “friends with benefits” once before, but it was more a relationship without the label). If I did I might have given pause. But if there aren’t any major red flags I’m missing here I’m willing to push through it
It’s called love bombing and unfortunately you’re a victim of it. You should research about this. It’s extremely common and gaining more knowledge of it will prevent you for falling for it.
Just know that he probably really liked you as you did him. The reality of it is though is that you have to realize you both liked the idea of each other, and not who you both really are. If you’re falling for someone’s words, and not with their actions it is only an illusion. You might have an anxious, insecure attachment style that lures you to people that know how to make you feel secure, not people who actually want to be secure with you.
I honestly don't understand why porn is even needed to masturbate as some in here are claiming. Can these guys not just imagine things? I've never once needed to put on audio to get off.
Like I don't get it. Can they not think things and see it in their own head?
Buy an extra large bottle of lotion, take yourself and your cell to the bathroom and you abuse the meat until the only thing spewing out is dust. Then you go Netflix and chill with the gf and take your @ss to sleep.
I always heard that ex partners, mainly men, usually do for new partners what they didn't do in past relationships. They hear you when you complained. So when they get someone new, they take that feedback to the new relationship.
If he wanted to spend time with you, he'd spend time with you. Why stay in a situation that makes you feel lonely and ignored? He's made clear his priority is video games.
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Get a new boyfriend, you’re way too young to tie down to someone so incompatible.
Yeah it is quite amazing that he didn't have any insight as to how the children might look like her because she's their mother
Everyone involved has a right to the DNA test. Honestly, you’re overreacting. If anything the test should be mandatory.
Sounds like he's using you to keep his apartment paid up while he's gone. Ditch this guy.
Is the move for you or him? Are you moving closer or further from your support system? If it’s farther and the move is not for you, do not move.
For what purpose. He doesn't have any doubts the first child is his.
She’s growing an entire brand new person right now, a tiny person who is stealing the very components of her body to make its own. You sound ridiculously selfish, OP.
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I'm sorry to say your sister doesn't want the type of relationship with you that you want with her. There is something about hanging out with the cousins that she values more than your feelings. I think you have to accept that. Sometimes when people come from tough families, we can misjudge relationships. I think you're also falling into the pitfall of probably never feeling validated by your family so sometimes you can overreact a little bit. But it's not your fault, you just need to learn to validate yourself so you can put small slights in perspective. That doesn't mean nothing ever bothers you, but you learn how to share your feelings about it in a way that rallys support for you rather than justifies people saying you're being dramatic.
Maybe talking to therapist or doing some journaling about how the past could be affecting how you see things now could be helpful. You don't sound crazy, I can just relate to your frame of mind and it wasn't really a helpful one for me to have long term, unfortunately
Agreed. Even if I chose to adhere to all those boundaries, she could've told me about them herself. I felt betrayed the most that she brought her friend to discuss that with me instead… it was just extremely creepy and scary.
I think that’s really sweet to get you a cat as a surprise. Maybe he’s upset because you seem ungrateful? If you wanted a pet and then he got you one I don’t see the issue? Especially if you like the cat anyways, I think you’re over thinking things, just enjoy your new pet.
Also cat pic tax? Can we see the kitten?
I know I’m sorry about that. And that’s kinda the vibe that I get sometimes too but then there’s things that he does and helps me do and everything that shows he cares. And it’s not like we are constantly at each others throats(even though lately we have been because of our friend) but before he started hanging out with her, of course we had disagreements but things were mostly good. He’d text me back when I’d ask if he’s ok and he’d call me every move he made but now he just doesn’t.. and I think there are a few different reasons as to why that is but I also know that if I was out with someone that I knew and had the chemistry like him and her and had sex with before, oh these walls are coming down from the yelling lol but he expects me to be ok with this. I had someone come over to bring me something and I hadn’t known this person long and did have sex with him.. but this person was waiting on someone and my bf wasn’t home so I was like yeah whatever let’s hang. My bf just about torn the door down with how hot he was knocking.. but it’s ok for him to do things like that.
get the vibe that she's more into this guy than she's into you.
Possibly. She has been spending a lot more time away from me after a worse turn in our relationship. I believe she doesn't have much interest in fixing the relationship.
But I also kind of get the vibe that you're steering the vibe that way with the way you described the situation. I don't know if that's intentional, subconscious, or you're just accurately reflecting what happened, but people often have a bit of bias without realizing it, so I tend to allow for the potential of subconscious bias. You kind of have to when you're only getting one side of the story.
I try not to be but of course I may be doing so, subconsciously. This story is mainly from my perspective so I don't know what it's like from her side. She could actually have been ignoring my calls or not, I wouldn't know. I doubt she is cheating, but she does want to spend more time with other people rather than with me nowadays.
I think it's fair to be firm that she has to inform guys she hangs out with that she's not single. I think that's a very fair boundary to have. Like you're not even saying she can't hang with guys, but they have to know she's not single.
I agree, and if my relationship doesn't end, I'll be sure to communicate this to her. And yes, I allow her to hang with guys, but I did tell her to let me know if she's going alone to a singular guy's house.
After 5 years she still doesn’t trust you. It doesn’t sound like she ever will. That’s not a healthy relationship and frankly you should be glad to be done with it.
And you are not relationship material.
He just needs to deliberately flunk the paternity test. Give all the wrong answers so it comes back negative for paternity.
Wife always has to trump others I don’t care how much they say they need you. Wife: #1. Always. That means lily is out
Its not unreasonable to want a day to decompress at home without needing to go out. Did you need the whole time completely separate from her in order to relax? Or would spending time with her later in the day be an option at all?
Can you clarify what she wants? Is it that she wants to go somewhere to have drinks, like a bar/pub? Would drinking at home be an option? Does there seem to be any reason that she is adamant about Friday?
Maybe to keep the peace offer to drink at home with her and see about setting a different day to go out (which I know you suggested another day already).
As I said, stunningly out of line. I assume you’ve stopped all contact?
You’re right. Abortion rights are different, but I personally still can not understand how someone can think it’s their business to prescribe how another person can choose to masturbate. An example which I don’t find different would be if a husband said he didn’t want his wife going out wearing short skirts or cropped tops and she agreed to it, then one day she decided to go out on the town with her friends wearing these kinds of clothes. Most of the women in this sub would probably agree that it was totally controlling for the husband to ask this in the first place and fuck him, she can do as she pleases. They probably wouldn’t say that it’s the husband’s right to set a boundary around what he feels comfortable with his wife wearing or which parts of her body she’ll allow other men to see in public.
Why do some people think it’s acceptable to control what kind of media their partner consumes? If it’s illegal, then that’s understandable, but otherwise it’s just controlling. Did we grow up and leave home to just find another person to parent us? It reminds me of trying to watch porn as a teenager at my parents’ house.
If someone goes into a newsagent with their partner are they going to tell them to cast their eyes down so they don’t see the top shelf of pornography? Are they going to pause a film if a sex scene gets too graphic? Divert their eyes if they stumble upon a nudist beach or a hot run in a university town? Why do they think it’s their right to dictate this?
You know what’s worse than having a partner who watches a bit of porn in their alone time? One who has all of urges to watch porn but who can’t fulfil these urges, and who feels babied and controlled by their significant other. I bet you anything these situations might lead to cheating, or just meeting someone who doesn’t feel the need to control their SO, and deciding that the grass is MUCH greener when you can do as you please and you’re not in a controlling relationship!
. I’m saving up for it, but it’s been hot with how expensive everything has gotten and how high our rent is.
So does he want to be proposed to with the ring? Does he want to go shopping for the rings together BEFORE the proposal? Does he want you to propose with a placeholder ring and then go shopping together? How does your ring come into play?
Someone mentioned a temporary symbolic ring and I think I’ll do that
Don't just do what someone else suggests. Sit your bf down and ask him what HE wants to do when it comes to that point.
It might play into the “looking for outrage” trope, or the being overly concerned over word usage when we all understand the gist of what was said.
To put it another way, while yes certain words may or may not be associated with different sides of this issue……….
The VAST majority of the population does not strongly associate with either side of the issue, and the VAST majority of the population is not aware of which side has black listed which words.
I’m not concerned about them potentially inviting the ex. I definitely realize I’ve been overthinking the “how much to tell” part, thank you very much for the reply!
I appreciate your feedback. For the first part you are right. Regarding the buisness, he needed the money to start it, he started it, is going fine, he could easily pay it back. Dad said he didn't have to, bf insisted it was a loan, and honestly i wished he even tried dad would have said no anyways, cause he loves him, and wants to help him, but it would show character. The thing is he wants to expand the buisness. So he needs more. There are other options, but banks take a lot of comission these days, so its easier for him to get the money from us.
The crime mentioned by the fantasist OP isn’t very nice, but absolutely nothing like rape.
Buy some headphones. Seriously. You can get them at a Dollar General for $1.25. Turn on a fan, buy some ear plugs, and buy headphones.
I come from an abusive situation. I’m NC with my parents but I wouldn’t want to see what he would do if my father ever slapped me in front of my husband and in- laws. Heck, my father-in-law would probably break his other arm…
Oh, so the man your husband bullied to suicide was just overreacting? You are a troll. You should just delete this
So when you got together, you were 22 and 30? Any chance your fiancé designed it so you’d feel dependent on him?
Would you like to go to xzy? I’ve heard they’re very good
Bad idea. If I were you I'd back down so hot that even shrimps would come asking me about swimming tips.
The chances this will blow up in you faces are.. well 100%. Especially when there's a close friend involved.
Kinda makes me wonder why your wife suggested that. And with her BFF no less.
Time for a long deep conversation with your spouse.
If her reaction to you comforting her and answering her question was to lash out at her, don't do anything like that with her again.
UpdateMe!
you need her to be medically diagnose. something is super wrong with her bro
Yes. Don’t listen to these people.
Girl, please move on. You are not the same person you were when you were 17 and you won’t be the same person in another 5 years. This guy is not worth wasting MORE of your time with.
Run
Go no contact. You don’t even like you like her that much
Hi, thank you so much for your reply
The reason I came to reddit instead of straight to a lawyer is because he stated he had no intention of sharing these images with anyone, but as you can imagine that doesn't ease my conscience too much. He was threatening to essentially shit-talk me, which is also damaging to my career because of how much coworkers and divisions talk. The relationship between me and my coworkers is already strained and I'm afraid that starting another scandal will make them dislike me even more.
Also, yes, my place of work is WAY outdated, we didn't have a SH policy because there weren't women in the field very much before me (I wonder why). Also in my region, my employer can essentially fire me with no cause or warning which is why reputation is so insanely important.
Leave while you still can!
my brother in law is like this and its so draining to have a conversation sometimes. i can't imagine what my sister is going through. he has to be right all the time. or he finds a way to make her doubt her opinions. even regarding things he has no clue about, like women's problems. its extremely frustrating.
he's 28, you aren't gonna change him by talking to him. rn he has this high ground over you and thinks he's better than you in every way that even the slightest reason for you to think he's wrong will make him upset. honestly why would you want to be with someone like that?
HOW can you tell that?
Just gecause you don't see it doesn't mean it doesn't go on!