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You are a cheater in the making. I imagine some man will be crying about you on here in the future.
She lied to you about something that was promised in the relationship. That you cared about. Your marriage is over.
Yes I forgot to mention. We have had several almost break ups throughout the relationship because he says he’ll change but he doesn’t. His flakiness and empty promises got worse when he started using drugs.
This strikes me as a situation where OP messed up and begged for a second chance. Husband half heatedly took her back and hasn't really felt the need to put much more effort into the half dead relationship.
I could be totally wrong but that's just how it first striked me.