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Take a breath. The fact is that this is not going to be the only time life is going to kick you in the head, and they're going to be times when the roles are reversed and he's getting kicked and he'll probably feel like he's not being a great boyfriend, but at the end of the day you were there to love and support each other through times like these especially.
Obviously with the relationship there's a whole future ahead, and while I understand this period is extremely difficult it will pass, so as long as you are doing your best to make sure you let him know how much you appreciate his love and support then you have no real reason to make yourself feel worse by thinking you're being a bad girlfriend when you're not.
It definitely look into seeing a therapist though because having someone from the outside being able to talk to about these things and also what's going on in your personal life outside of the relationship is going to be extremely helpful and will also fine-tune your communication skills which you can then apply to communicating with your boyfriend and be an even better partner then you thought you could be
But to reiterate I really can't tell you how important it is to just let people know how much you appreciate them being there for you in my experience that has been more than enough for me to feel like when I've put myself out there for people it was worth it and if he's as wonderful as you describe him to be I'm sure he'll feel the same, and also don't be afraid to sit him down and kind of check in with how he's doing and also how he's feeling about the relationship again it's all about honest open communication
Let her leave. Everyone deserves time to themselves. It will only get worse and she won’t want you even talking to friends. This kind of control is not a relationship. Ignore her and go to the game. Even if she was bluffing about leaving, break up anyway because you can’t live! by her rules. She is toxic.
You’re not married. This anniversary is not recognized by many people so perhaps he doesn’t realize how important it is to you. I think it’s silly and couldn’t tell you what day my partner and I met but to each their own.
As for the trip? If you trust him, let it go. If you don’t trust him, dig in to that.
You’re ostensibly an attractive young woman and get hit on all the time. Do you trip and fall on a dick just because someone is around? I’m guessing not. So who cares if his ex is there even if she’d want to get back with him? I’m thinking he can organize himself just fine.