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Not sure you handled it well but your hookup girl certainly did
I'm sorry OP. I know you must feel awful because maybe in your head if it were SA you could forgive him but he had already crossed a boundary and lied. He even admitted that it was not SA for him.
You need to take a step back from this relationship and focus on yourself. It will be easier if you cut all contact because sometimes as a partner we take on the role of emotional support and you might feel the need to check up on him to help him or reassure him.
Start therapy if you haven't already. Cut all contact. Surround yourself with friends and family and focus on yourself and healing.
He also has a kid.
I think this would be the only thing I'd talk to your sis about. So she loves this man, he loves her…they most likely are actively planning to close the gap.
How will this work with him having a child? Is the bio mum still in the picture? Does he have full- or shared custody? Have they got two good lawyers to protect them both and the kid in case things ever turn sour? If they break up after him moving over on a K1/C1 visa, would she also be financially responsible for his child if he's able to bring them to the US as well?
How old is the child? Do they think they'll adapt to the US easily?