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Languages: nl,en,es,pl
Birth Date: 1988-09-20
Body Type: bodyTypeAverage
Ethnicity: ethnicityWhite
Hair color: hairColorOther
Eyes color: eyeColorGreen
Subculture: subcultureRomantic
While I don't think you can get any closure from this exact scenario it can be good, thinking about how your special gift doesnt work for someone like Allie can help you to appreciate the other people you've given a special gift like this to, while I don't think you can ask for present back, it might help to at least focus on the positive experiences of your special gifts 🙂 (by the way I think the idea of a special gift outfit that matches yours is super cute!) Hope this helps a little!
Not all white people are just rude $
I am not one to look through phones at all but he definitely looks through mine as well, he was cheated on in a past relationship. I am insecure because a lot of girls that tried talking to him before we got together seemed to be a lot of his friends girlfriends, or in relationships. I just worry he will find a girl who doesn’t want a relationship or something and start fooling around but there hasent ever been recent messages or anything with women. Looking through each others phone isn’t really my issue tho, it’s the fact that he’s has to use the I’m not into big girls to make me feel better but still obviously has an attraction to them, is he too scared to admit that he’s attracted to bigger girls? Or is he just fantasizing about what he doesn’t have because he has skinny. I just feel like it’s wrong to look at it like that tho, if your interested in something the complete opposite of me why are you with me.
Is she mentally or physically disabled in some way? You say she works out, so I assume she's perfectly capable. There are no children to care for or to clean up after. She should be able to maintain an apartment in 2 hours a day, including laundry for 2 adults. Let's be generous and say another hour for meal prep. You said she's a “foreigner.” I'm curious how you met and what made you fall in love with her. She's also abusive toward you. Ate you staying with her only because you don't think you can find better? I can't imagine life with such a horrendous person. Dude, for the love of all that's holy leave this woman!!!
He’s so young that my main guess is he got swept up in the romantic idea of marriage and family, but now that the reality is here, he’s scratching his head and wondering if he’ll miss out on an exploratory 20’s. Sorry to say but I’m worried if you stick with him you’ll miss on your timeframe. It’s worth considering if the best investment of your time moving forward is finding someone older who is more compatible with your goals.
You're right – unfortunately we started dating right at the peak of the pandemic so we were kind of each other's bubble. He lost his apartment in the city and moved back in with his parents at the time so I never got to see how he lived independently.
I’m usually asked by the employee if I need help with anything. I tell them I am looking for socks as an example and it immediately goes to “my boyfriend likes these socks”. This is just an example. It’s no more than a 30 second to a minute conversation
Why does he think you have to meet all his needs for socialization? That's not reasonable.
Cider isn't just juice lol
We have apple juice. And then we have cider. Its the way its prepared, usually with spices and served warm. We also have alcoholic ciders, which are tasty as well.
Why do you want to salvage it???
Lol apparently. I don’t know what to believe anymore
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Sorry, but anyone at 20 saying they are “polyamorous” is just looking for a get-out clause. I can't believe anyone actually falls for this
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You've got some conflicting ages in this Q. But when someone tells you they won't be texting you for a while because they want some solitude it doesn't mean they dislike you. Texts are just intrusive if they're nonstop and everyone needs time to think. If you're someone who needs constant contact this is simply the wrong person for you to be trying to build this digital relationship with. Doesn't mean either party is evil. Just that you're not a good match to one another.
Sorry but if there was no prior consent that he's allowed to touch you while asleep that's plain Sexual Assualt. This's gross violation of your trust and boundaries. Have a talk with him how this is crossing the limits and if he doesn't respect your space and violate repeatedly not only you'd break up with him but file charges.
It was rape. Your body can literally become aroused/lubricated to prevent damage but it’s still rape. Arousal or not fighting DOES NOT equal consent.
Yes ma’am
Give it some time. We had our last one when my wife was in her mid 40s and it’s been great. If he’s the one don’t rush it. His feelings might change once yours are a bit older.
Perhaps, and perhaps most virgins at that age can be weird if you believe that but it is still not enough to make a generalized rule. In the end it's about the person and why they made certain choices and not the choice in itself.
Without context of what the fight was about and what you mean by “physical,” no one can help you.
Personally I find them a bit tacky and cringy but honestly, what does my opinion or anyone else's actually matter? If you like them and you'd like to wear them, go ahead and do it. Enjoy yourselves and have fun. You're living your own lives and you don't owe anyone else shit.
It's totally about control.
She wants out of the relationship so she can screw someone else who she has already identified but feels guilty ending it herself so that she can be with this other person so she is trying to get you to end it. GAME OVER. Time to move on ….
Do the right thing and tell her the truth. You're not protecting her and if she forgives you and finds out about it – it will be worse.
If my girlfriend started working less because it makes her happier I would be the last person to discourage it. More and more young people are coming to the conclusion that they don’t want to spend 40 hours a week in a dusty office.
Maybe you can ask your girlfriend why she exactly wants you to work more hours. To me my girlfriend’s happiness and health is my top priority. If she decided that she can keep living her life and lay her bills ánd maintain her happiness by working 4 days a week instead of 5, all props to her!
If she wants you to give up your quality time so she can on-line some fantasy in the suburbs, two cars on the driveway, a dog… that doesn’t seem quite right. The potential money you can bring in to finance that fantasy future seems to be more important to her than your happiness.
Maybe that's what she should ultimately do, but shouldn't that be a last resort rather than a first resort? Are you not supposed to see if your partner would agree to what you want before you up and leave?
I certainly agree he should have discussed it prior. I’m simply talking about how she’s framing the issue. The issue is that he didn’t talk to her about it, not that she adjusted her life completely for him already. That simply isn’t true based on how she presented the situation.
It’s not “emotional” to suggest the internet is full of shitty people.
But you’re right that I’ve shared my opinion when you asked for it and there’s no sense repeating it. Enjoy the rest of your day.
OP, ask your wife about how her ex might feel about it, but really, it's your daughter's call.
And you'll note that I left out the “step-” prefix.
He didn't confide in you. You got suspicious and called him out on it and he had to admit it. Don't get things twisted. Hes not a good guy and you need to leave.
Nasty situation, you can take him to court, but I'm pretty sure you don't keep receipts for your belongings?
It boggles the mind how people my senior can act like this, sorry about your loses and good luck getting some justice.
In general, if you're the victim, calling the cops is your best bet, they will take him to jail for at least 48 hours, longer if there are bruises or signs of abuse in which time, you're free to move your stuff around or if you own the house change the locks.
I hope you learn from this ordeal so you don't repeat it in the future, good luck.
Because you were. He wants to fuck her, she knows it, she went on a date with him.
She is not your gf, so act accordingly
Oh they’ve met many times. She absolutely adored his mother but fears his dad and says she thinks he secretly hates women even though he has given no reason to indicate that that’s true.
We have been married for 8 years now and have a 6 yo daughter.
You may not like the result of a paternity test.
3 years ago my wife went to a hen party for one of her friends, it was for 4 days and when she came back she was a little stressed for a few days but I never thought too much about it. And she was fine a few days later.
Aside from the lying to your face repeatedly. Sure. She was just fine.
My original plan was to keep it to myself and investigate some more but my anxiety got the better of me and I confronted my wife. To say she was surprised would be an understatement, she looked as if she had touched a on-line wire. To her credit she did not deny it but she is adamant that they did not have sex.
That might have mattered if she had been honest and come clean about it soon afterwards.
Doesn't matter now. Instead she lied to you about it with a straight face repeatedly and was so convincing you put it out of your mind. She would have continued lying in a mercenary and opportunistic fashion for the next 5 decades if she hadn't gotten caught.
Sorry, but your wife is a liar. You'd be foolish to trust her to any great degree, knowing that she can lie maliciously, convincingly, and without real remorse, and is only likely to come clean when there's video evidence.
I am absolutely devastated right now and staying in a hotel till I get my thoughts in order.
Go back home. Talk to a lawyer.
My first instinct was to file for divorce but we have a 6 yo
Whom might not even be related to you, genetically. I'm not saying it's likely but you can't know for sure it this point.
In any other situation, I would normally agree. But he's talking to and being friendly with a person who abused you in more ways than one. I wouldn't want to be around a person like that, it would literally disgust me.
The fact that you've told your boyfriend that this hurts you and makes you feel unsafe, means that he's continuing to do it knowing that he's causing you emotional destress. This isn't some girl at the office that you think he likes.
If he's minimized contact with your ex. I assume that means he won't have any contact with him. But, honestly, after his reaction to your request, I don't really trust him.
Is this how you want to be treated? Anyone who “lords” over another is insecure….you did nothing wrong, this will be your life..
I would agree that something this consistent is probably not nothing.
I think it's very kind of you to take the initial approach of worrying about her well-being. But I think where you went wrong here is by making it about her well-being for 2 weeks and then going straight to “my needs aren't being met, so leave me alone until you're ready to meet them”. I think the second step should have been split up into two steps.
Step 1: something is off. Are you okay? Step 2: if you're really okay, then I need you to communicate with me a little more and put more effort into our conversations. My needs aren't being met in this relationship as it is right now. Step 3: you're still saying everything is fine, and you're still not meeting me halfway on the communication issue. I don't know what else I can do except ask that we take a break until you have the time and energy to talk to me more consistently or tell me what's going on.
Maybe you did that at some point and just didn't clog this post with it. If not, I'd try finding a way to amend the situation and have that Step 2 conversation now.
Also, you've only mentioned texts. Is this a LDR? The issue could be that she's not getting enough face time, and that might explain why she isn't seeing an issue. Losing touch can be a slow burn. So if possible, maybe schedule some time together, in person if possible. If not, try a video call, or even just a regular phone call.
This post just reeks of an emotional affair. Not even beginning of one, this is one.
Do you think your wife has a bad temper? Do you agree with this other woman that you and you’re wife are not a good match? If yes, divorce her and start something with this woman. If no, reflect deeply. This woman is feeding you shit that will end your marriage and turn it into a full blown affair. She’s manipulating you into believing that your wife is a bad person when maybe she isn’t.
I’m not gonna tell you to own up to your wife about secretly hanging out with this woman because, let’s face it, you won’t. But think very carefully. Are you happy in your marriage?
It’s very, very difficult and needs handled carefully. There’s no doubt about that. However there’s also no doubt that she cheated on you and perhaps would continue to cheat and lie if this horrific event hadn’t happened.
Seek help for your wife and look at pressing charges against her attacker. Seek support from family and friends (where you feel you can tell them the whole truth). You should also understand that you can support her even while you’re considering reconciliation or divorce.
You MUST separate dealing with this assault from your own future happiness. Take the steps you need to think if you can ever forgive and trust her again. Try to understand if your wife is capable or willing to help save your relationship and whether you want that.
Her assault can’t be the reason you don’t confront and deal with her betrayal. It’s not a reason to stay and you have to make decisions based on your own happiness and not on any noble sacrifice.
I Like your style & respect.
You have the right to know & I am suspicious too – why is he doing so & why suddenly the new hire is a woman in that particular role.
Maybe you wanna do some research on it? hihi
You throw all their things out and keep the towel in a paper bag UNWASHED! If either I've of them goes on about you having to evict them tell them you have the towel as evidence of incest and will contact the police. How would they like to be splashed across news as a crime interest story and how would they like to have their faces front and center on jailbirds? That should get them running away from you with their tails between their legs.
It's not weird at all. A lot of abuse and assaults happen through things like friends and family members because there's no safeguarding. You have to be willing to disclose this to someone else who is in a position to help.
Cancel your wedding. Trust is not rebuild by getting married. Get married only once he regains your trust.
To be fair 12 hours night shifts are not sustainable for most ppl, but he has chosen to fuck around instead of quitting his job.
Don't allow yourself to be dependent on him. Even if you marry him one day, at all times make sure that should he betray you, you can afford a way out of your marriage