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It is though: when you marry someone, you’re becoming involved I. Their whole family
Lol the fuck?
What's wrong with you?
I asked him why because I thought he had a crush on me even from school. He gave bs answers and I pushed him pretty naked
This is why you don’t do that. If you ask why once and they don’t want to answer, leave it at that. Don’t be a fucking weirdo about it.
It sounds like you’ve already have a discussion about it because he’s not sure if he met the mark or not.
When you inevitably have a follow up conversation, make sure you express gratitude first. Make sure you fully acknowledge where’s he’s coming from before you talk about your feelings. When you get a “that’s exactly right” signal from him, that’s a good sign that you’ve successfully convinced him you understand his POV.
The next step is to ask him questions that will force him to exercise empathy for you. For example, ask him something along the lines with “If you grew up like me, what expectations would you have around Christmas?”. Don’t try to force your POV on him, because it doesn’t seem he truly understands how it makes you feel. Just keep asking calibrated questions that guide him to your POV.
Hopefully after he understands how you truly feel, he will get you something that you both can feel good about.
I get what you mean 🙂 I started going to the gym (with him) last week as I'm very shy to go by myself. I do have a pretty busy life too (work, study, bub and a business) so our sexy time is also limited, is not like I look for him 24/7 haha. Thanks!!
Just do a paternity test with both you and your husband with her. Find out that way you at least know. Regardless she's stillborn daughter and I'm sure you love her.
Im down for that, let me text mark.
You’re both horrible people with no respect or care for anyone. Absolute trash humans.
I am sorry you went through that, OP. It breaks my heart to think that parents could do that.
If you want even a chance with this woman, you're going to have to tell her. She may freak out and bolt, or she may stay.
I had a BF WAY back when who had been in a serious car accident as a kid. He had lots of scars from all the reconstructive surgeries. He was a little sensitive about them, but they didn't mean anything to me. The scars meant he survived.
Yours mean that YOU survived, and I wish you all the happiness in the world, OP. Internet stranger mom-hugs if you would like them.
This OP. Normally I am very much “cleave to your spouse” but in this case your spouse is wrong and has issues of her own to work through.
To watch children be brutalized for her entertainment and flippantly try to excuse it because it was “in the past” or “she was lonely” shows that she is neither mature nor empathetic
Worse. She made out she is the victim. Honestly her therapist probably helped her come to that conclusion too
The baby is never going to learn to sleep on its own
You may wanna brush up on your literacy skills my dude
This seems like wise advice, I think you are right. Probably best to pack my things and online my life, and hope to meet someone right for me somewhere else down the line.
Yeah man…I'm overwhelmed dude like not okay dude I can't explain I feel at any moment I'm gonna pop and just end myself but I don't want that. Since I fully supported her for almost 9 years she's never had a job . She has nowhere to take our baby besides her parents trailer and they all smoke crack/ meth. No placefor a breastfed child it's also unclear if I can take care of a newborn myself in this mental state bro I don't wanna sound like a fucking whimp but I can hardly get myself to stay alive each day , pathetic I know but I have no reason to lie to a stranger. I'm disturbed deeply man
Wait what??
It doesn't fall on you to tell anyone anything. That's their buisness. You should tell your friend to be honest with this person and communicate that.
I wouldn’t feel comfortable enough to let him see me in this (or any man I’m not with), so I really understand this. If it’s in your bedroom, it’s none of your business. But common areas? I think it’s just common courtesy to at least have on shorts
Damn… Yeah. Unfortunately that's what I thought, but still thank you.
I would never think to ask my partner that unless I had some strong evidence. I wouldn't suspect it without that either, but yeah that question is pretty close to an accusation. And if he asked me I'd probably cry…
Jerk at one point he had been gone for like two months dealing with a family emergency and I got pregnant right after he got back. The timing was possible, obviously, but I wouldn't blame him for questioning when I look back. But he never did. The baby came out looking just like him except for the mouth which looked like mine so there wasn't even a tiny shadow of a doubt, even if she hadn't carried a rare disorder found in his family.
For OP, I think I know the thing she's talking about with the eyes, I have central heterochromia which means I have different colored rings in my iris. It's not as rare as some people think, though it's supposed to be recessive. My mom and two of her kids have it. Neither of my grandparents have it, though his great uncle did I think. I need to get a chance to see my youngest nephews eyes to find out if he has it as well because otherwise he looks exactly like me.
Funny thing though, everyone with blue eyes has the same distant ancestor according to geneticists. It's probably the same with heterochromia. Especially since most people with it have blue, though my sister has brown and green. I ended up with brown, green, and blue, though they are close in tone so you have to be looking in my eyes to notice. Some people it's so vivid that's the first thing you see!
IMO it's the fact that he added “(they/them)” in parentheses, instead of just saying “they.” Like he had to be extra pointing out pronouns, to be sure we all realize how ridiculous he thinks it is.
Stop cooking.
It’s the 1 on 1 that makes it worse too imo. When you add a few people it’s different.
Idk I wouldn’t ever be in the situation but I’d probably not love it if my wife spent more of her time with another man than she did with me, regardless of how secure we were.
In all conflict resolution training you are taught to keep the attacker on your side and comply with any requests long enough to either escape or for help to arrive. This is usually through talking etc. However, in this scenario if having sex is the thing that buys you both enough time to get a peaceful resolution, it is a bit defeatist to just give up because they may not let you go after.
I don’t think your BF is just jealous in this case. That’s what majority of significant others would do
Some man really managed to gaslight you into thinking non-physical sexual stuff isn’t cheating.
The person who you know about lives far away. Do you know that he’s the only one? How would you know that?
Sure, but do you go around recommending that people of both genders regularly polygraph their partner to make sure they’re not cheating for no other reason than paranoia?
I’m going to guess no, because people would call you insane.
That’s essentially what this is. It’s turning the birth of your kid into a polygraph test for your partner, for no other reason than paranoia.
It's like the plot to a bad romance novel.
Work on the narrative more, who would root for you?
If you're on a dating app and not ready to meet people, then you shouldn't be on a dating app. He's in a rush to meet? He's literally trying to date. You're not.
So you're suggesting he's not that serious? Everyone would logically suggest that you're not that serious. Yes, you're being entirely unreasonable. You're worried he's going to lose interest? You're setting yourself up for exactly that.
I’m a T1 and I know it’s very different, but I am just exhausted after a bad low.
You were in the hospital and your father had just recently died
It doesn't matter if he is sorry
It doesn't matter if it truly was a one off mistake
The fact that he would even remotely consider cheating on you during this time in your life only serves to show you the kind of person he actually is
And he is not a good person
The only thing you can do is end the relationship and walk away….AND…you make sure your mutual friends know exactly what he did and that the cheating happened while you were in the hospital and dealing with the death of your father
People cheat all the time. Its a sad reality of life
but to cheat during this moment in your life? He doesn't deserve to walk away from this unscathed