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Your mom’s a fucking creep and a disgusting excuse for a mother. I wouldn’t blame you for cutting her off permanently. She’s a vile and disgusting waste of space.
You are right on the money that you would grow resentful in the end.
Where's your logic in thinking you should introduce him now specifically because your mom saw a hot? What were you waiting for in “meaning to introduce” him at any other time?
Next, what does your mom mean by a “guy like him?”
Where's your logic in thinking you should introduce him now specifically because your mom saw a very hot? What were you waiting for in “meaning to introduce” him at any other time?
Next, what does your mom mean by a “guy like him?”
I think y'all need to sit down and discuss what you both want your sex life to look like given the current situation. Who initiates, when, what acts are on the table as an option, etc. And emphasize what you said here that you want to be with her but you aren't sure what she wants.
I have a bunch of problems that are not conducive to sex and I initiate on good days. But also good days are/were limited and there's other stuff I want to do in my life besides have sex. It's not necessarily that you don't prioritize sex, it's that you have to sacrifice stuff you really want to do constantly so the way you think about it is very different than healthy people who can do whatever on a whim.
Over time I have found things to help with my medical shit, but I don't think I will ever be 100% and have the sex life of a couple with 2 healthy people. I don't know your partners issues but it's pretty unlikely that someone dealing with chronic stuff is going to get to a point where they are 100% functional forever. Even if you find medication that works perfectly now things ebb and flow, especially with mental health. And even if you are super improved, your mindset doesn't change over night when you've spent years of your life living around your issues.
I don't think you should throw initiating out the window forever. You both just need to discuss the situation FREQUENTLY as things change. And don't approach it as “I wish we had more sex” approach it as “what can we do to have the best sex life possible for both of us right now”
Are you upset she shared this experience with her friend? Or are you upset that she didn't enjoy it?
If it's the second, well… I'm sure it didn't go great for you either. “It's OK” means she's not holding it against you and she doesn't want you to feel badly or discouraged. But, I doubt either of you got the feeling of restored intimacy, connectedness, and pleasure you would describe as “great sex”.