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It is inherently wrong to willingly participate in a betrayal of the worst kind. Once you experience the gut wrenching discovery that your spouse is having sex and emotionally involved with someone else, you'll realize the gravity of what an affair means and the damage and trauma it causes. To the Betrayed spouse, it's on the scale of a woman being raped…. It's a visceral violation and it often takes years to overcome and many can never overcome it carrying the emotional scars forever preventing them from trusting anyone on an emotional level again.
I’m sorry but it’s time to accept reality. If he refuses to accept professional help then you need to look after your own wellbeing. I would give him an ultimatum; either go to therapy or get out of your life. You only have one of those and you don’t need a boat anchor stopping you from living your best life. It might even help him to sort himself out.
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Stop letting him stick it in until he gives you what you want.
Yeah, lots of people here arguing that “safe and secure” are compliments, all while ignoring the context, which completely ruins any positive connotation.
I agree and I am in favor of staying. I've invested my heart and soul into this. If she, for even a week shows that she is Willing to work 50-50, I'll honestly delete this post and be a happy man.
Still no. Two adults dating is not creepy.
Well fucking society. It’s just internalized. I have to unlearn it. After just hearing everywhere that women spoil at what is it, 25? (Thanks Leo DiCaprio) that’s unfortunately in my head. Plus my entire life getting the bare minimum from family/spouse. I’ll work on that with my therapist lmao
He used to be in a toxic relationship where his old partner also used blocking as a way to punish him. He says through me he now realizes that she was right and that he deserved to be blocked and locked out of the house back then even though he (like me) used to have panic attacks over it.
The thing about toxic relationships is you need to relearn what behaviors are toxic and what aren't. He's only saying he deserved it because it's not happening to him anymore. Would he be okay with it if you starting blocking him for no reason? He knows how you feel about being blocked but just doesn't care. With how childish and insensitive he is, why do you think it will be better when you're dating in person. Toxic behaviors tend to get worse when they're not being addressed and he dont think he's doing anything wrong. I would block him permanently.
I really appreciate that, but I don't know. Maybe I'm in denial, maybe I don't want to be alone or have to start over again, but I just don't want to leave him. He has never done more that talk to these other girls. The worst was some mild flirting, but nothing else. No sexting, no nudes, no dates, no sleeping together, nothing.
Leave that poor dude alone
Learn to leave people alone. It’s Reddit