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I've never seen/read 50 shades so I'll take your word for it lol.
I thought the same thing too about just having a conversation. She could have just voiced her concerns. I mean, way to take the fun out of something that's meant to be, well….fun. I can see why her partner was pissed off.
At the same time though, maybe this kind of thing is normal in their relationship. Still though, not a lot of warmth and comfort in signing a contract just to have sex.
I hate hurting people and I guess am just too weak to stand firm
In the long term standing firm will actually hurt both of you less, because when you don't you set yourself up for more cycles of trying to break up, and this takes an emotional toll on both of you.
I guess I'm just looking some perspective on the best way to go about this. I feel like I'm going to ruin his life and that it's disrespectful to end things the way I want to, but I don't know what to do.
Breakups are ugly, there's no nice way to do it. The kindest thing to do is, to be clear that this is the end. It gives both of you a clear end and clear signal to start working on healing, moving on and seeing other people.
He may view it as “ruin his life”, but being with someone that doesn't want to be with him (you), is not a good life either.
And given how he insists on getting back together till you agree, I agree you should do it in a message. And yes, it may be necessary to unfriend/unfollow him everywhere.