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But why this???
If I’m that dude, when the feeding thing went down, I’d have just made a super awkward comment on purpose to make sure it never happened again lol
That's an insane amount of time. If you had a guest house, then sure. But to share an apartment for 0.6% of an average persons life span and to be upset to get push back on that seems unreasonable. Obviously cultural differences come into play and those need to be considered as you chose your partner and with that her culture, I think 3 months is a good compromise to that point.
I love my brother dearly but even 3 weeks was starting to get cumbersome, I just wanted to be free in my own space.
Yeahh because at first I kind of saw it but wasn’t sure if it was actually an erection until he told me he had it.
“He asked me to leave him alone, so I followed him and asked him about… ” ?
This is a really sad story but I couldn't help chuckling at this classic wife behaviour
I would be very frustrated too if I was in your position. I think it might be worth another talk with her and tell her just how serious it has become.
Maybe something like, “GF, I really love you and our relationship but we need to talk about how we communicate when something upsets us. I know I've talked to you before about how you seem to shut down when you get upset, but I really need you to make more of an effort to stop doing this and actually communicate with me about whatever has upset you. It's not fair to me to constantly feel like a burden and like you don't appreciate me without even knowing why because you refuse to talk to me. If something doesn't change soon, I will need to start re-thinking where this relationship is going because I can't keep feeling like this.”
But if you feel like you have tried one too many times already to communicate, you're free to end the relationship of course. It has only been six months. If she hasn't shown even a small bit of improvement in those six months after all the talks you've had, no one would blame you for just cutting your losses and moving on. No one deserves to feel that way by the way their partner treats them, and honestly the silent treatment is a form of emotional abuse.
Thankyou, im so glad i got a parents perspective on this
Nah, you do him one better.
Tell him he doesn't have to worry about cheating on you, because you have too much self respect to stay with someone who cares so little for you as a person and only thinks of you as an incubator for the future children he likely won't actually help raise.
According to this sub, it's a valid excuse if you belong to one particular gender… ?♂️
I wouldn't call what you wrote dumb, it actually makes sense to me, so I'd try it for sure, and thanks!
and are often somewhat naive about how dangerous and unpredictable abusers can be.
Indeed. I suppose there's also quite a bit of physical and emotional distance between readers/commenters and posters when you're simply reading a description of their situation, versus talking to them offline in real life. Sometimes there's simply no substitute for in-person interaction, especially when it's a high-stakes situation with the potential for danger.
I work in sex health counselling at the university level and so agree with your viewpoint having seen a lot of these situations.
Thanks for the important work you do!
And thanks as well for taking the time to write your comments.
As nude as this may be for you to deal with, it’s not your story to tell. No good can come of you telling. Let your father handle this his way. You work on your relationship with your father.
You keep using that word “friend.” I do not believe it means what you think it means.
There is so many things to say… did he change your name from “babe ❤️” to “John” before he go to party… sent 3 messages to someone by mistake is kind of weird…
His message sounds like if you were not nude enough for him…
He is 30+… no, MAN don’t speak like teenagers… a 30+ years old real man, will respect his partner enough to shut up if he finds another woman attractive… because that’s normal, but calling his buddy to maybe help him to take 2 “hot” girls… naaah
I know you don’t want to break up with him, but trust me, sooner or later you will, and you will regret of wasting more time with a low quality ass like his.
We went without for over a year after my wife gave birth. I agree that it was harsh for her to make you feel like a predator. I think you should discuss with her about your feelings too.
There is very little that I don't talk to my partner about, we have been together for 10 months or so romantically, but close friends for much longer. I feel like we talked about almost everything before we even got together, but we still don't run out of subjects to chat about. Maybe watch something interesting together (a documentary on a subject you both like) and that might spark a conversation? Maybe if you both have a potential hobby you'd like to get into, do it together and maybe that'll help. I don't think it's necessarily a sign that you're incompatible, you could both just be too shy to initiate.
What you do is you grow a pair and accept that she is breaking up with you.
Amen!
Yeah, it's just me ovelry thinking stuff just to make her more comfortable. But that's whet I stop being me, I started seeming like I was off, and she noticed me being so (all this mostly on a sexual context). I talked about it with her yesterday, and new she dros a “we need to talk”. Why can't I fast-forward time to late this afternoon!?
Let that be a lesson. You do not, now or ever, know more about someone’s family than they do. There can be long, complex issues that go back years, and no one is obligated to tell you. You have to take people at their word when someone says they’re not close to family because there is always a reason. It’s not for you to fix.
Yeah, that’s one way to look at it. I would’ve appreciated her honesty as to where she works. Thanks for the comment.
Thankyou! I am so lost i dont know how to get out of this situation. I think i just got put the denail phase ablut my feelimgs towards him
Darling he had that reaction because they did coke. They are lying to you. You are too old to be believing that BS. Time to move on .
Lol dude come on. I can't believe you're 39 years old and just putting up with this shit. Good lord
She said something very important
“she would like to gain experience with others so she knows what love really is”
This is very telling in a lot of ways, and it’s not good.
She is looking for love and it’s NOT with you. She is trying to find the bigger better deal…and that’s NOT you. She wants other relationships NOT with you. She knows she wants more…NOT with you. She is going to try to keep you on the back burner just in case all her other relationships don’t work out and expect you to be OK with that. DON’T BE THAT GUY
When she finally figures out what love really is, and she made a mistake, make sure you have moved on and are happy with someone else that deserves you.
Good luck
Before I even started dating my fiance. I let him know my career is my priority next to my schooling. I work in vet med, we don't get rigid hours or anything. I was working ER when we first started dating, so similar case, emergency came in, we must deal with it, and sometimes cry about it. Emergencies and the medical field is very much the work is done, when it's done, not at 5pm.
But he knew from the start my life/work did not have a schedule or a guaranteed time off. And he's my fiance because he understood that and supports me every step of the way (especially now as I'm working an overnight shift and been pulling 60 hr weeks).
You need someone who can back you up. Not play a game, or be childish because you managed to be under 10 minutes late, when it could have easily been hours.
Honestly, tect him the last blip of your post. Either tough it out and be supportive with you or gtfo
Statistically old people are shit drivers while being smug entitled assholes, so can’t really say I blame him for flipping them off.
Source for statistics: Trust me bro.
OP has been guilt tripping her son for years to the point where he avoids telling her things for fear of how she’ll react, plus her therapist has already told her that she can’t control him but here she is, still making it all about her. I don’t mind being blunt with strangers on the internet who clearly need a reality check
Weird? Why? Do you keep forever dibs on people like dudes friend?
He doesn’t love you very much. I didn’t even finished reading, come on now! Leave him, love yourself, you deserve better
I'd imagine trying to contact him again would only stress him out and he doesn't deserve that.