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You’re pathetic lmao
Agreed that the lying is the worst part.
I am going to add my own anecdote. I had been casually seeing someone (person A) and there was about a week of overlap before I realized I wanted to be with a new person (B) I had just met. I had gone on one date with A during that week, and even though I wasn't officially exclusive with B, I still felt guilt about that overlap because I was trying to start a new chapter with person B.
Your question if she was seeing anyone else was trying to gauge if you were both on the same page about embarking on a new chapter together. I think this situation is indicative of the fact that you were not on the same page at that time, and while I do think you could move forward with this (if there are other, healthy aspects to your relationship), I would definitely be on alert after the lying, and the fact that she didn't seem to feel guilty about it.
Then who are you supposed to discuss with and vent to when things aren't going well? Without support, it just turns into more fighting. People should have the right to talk to the small handful of others that they trust.
As far as phone searches? I pity whoever goes through mine. I have constant curiosity, and I read or look up so many things that others would be confused and maybe even concerned with some of it. But, it's my phone and my search. My husband knows the risk of he wants my phone. But use each other's phones all the time.