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He seems “normal” in the sense that he says he doesn't want a relationship until he's in one and realizes it doesn't suck. Because yes,fwb is still a relationship, it just has different negotiated rules than a typical romantic relationship.
Why would you lose your children if you divorce? They’re just as much yours as they are hers, plus she can’t provide for them cause she’s an ungrateful parasite.
If it took to betray your entire family to act like a perfect wife, it was all an act anyway. Forgiving a dumbass like that will literally show her that cheating and betraying have zero repercussions and that she is free to do what she wants. This woman needs to be dumped hot.
It sounds like your living situation is untenable for him and this is the straw that broke the camel’s back. Yes, he should have just told you what was in the drink rather than going nuclear about it, but it sounds like it was really about feeling out of control and having no privacy in his life. It just came out in the drink conversation. Maybe you all should take a break.
Oh 100% if you do have somewhere else to go then that is fabulous news. Maybe don't tell him til you get back to the country, I just worry he might be an asshole (he already is because of the age gap) and damage your belongings or steal them. So I'd just be friendly and normal til you get there and then get your stuff and leave. Congratulations on getting away from him, saw in your other comments that he's not a good man.