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Model from: co
Languages: en,es,de,fr,it
Birth Date: 1990-11-04
Body Type: bodyTypeCurvy
Ethnicity: ethnicityEbony
Hair color: hairColorBlack
Eyes color: eyeColorHazel
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I don't like the idea of percentages. I think you should both contribute equally to expences. But he should be contributing rent to you the Landlord, he's living for free…. Why? Anywhere else you need to pay rent or contribute to a mortgage. It doesn't have to be half of the mortgage but fair market value. Work out your expenses and split. That includes housework.
The whole “bigger penises HURT” narrative that u hear from us sometimes is very much TRUE. The best sex of my life was with the ex who had the smallest size, because we could actually DO things without worrying about pain and discomfort. Different speeds, positions, multiple rounds, longer time period, etc. Big dicks r fun to gawk over but are not practical in the slightest. I just read a thread on the askreddit sub that asked “have u ever broken up with a man because of his penis and why?” The number 1 reason for breaking up on that thread was “his penis was TOO big”.
You asked your gf a question and she answered honestly, because it’s the truth, maybe she’s been with some other people who were bigger. Doesn’t mean that she prefers that over you! I’ve had bigger than my current partner, but that’s nothing more than like, a random insignificant fact of my life. Diversity exists, people have physical differences, it’s inevitable. You might have had girls who had larger breasts than she did, or different body shapes, or idk different hair colour lmao, but I highly doubt you’re looking back and thinking “damn I prefer those traits over my current gf’s traits”. I’m sure your gf isn’t comparing you or secretly wishing you had like an 8 incher or something lol.
There’s nothing you can do here or for her. She, like many from that piece of the world is a slave to her culture. Until she decides her freedom is worth the guilt and shame from her parents disappointment, nothing will change.
Also, if she changes into someone like that will you even what to be their friend?
He doesn’t understand or appreciate what you’ve been through. He sounds like a grade-A asshole. Please know that you can do so much better. YOU are the one with trauma. YOU are the one who deserves something better.
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People find love, or probably mostly lust in this case, wherever. In this instance it looks like a hookup. Could very well have been the start of a relationship. Who are OP and we to deny that?
In a perfect world (from OP's view) the friend would have told OP himself. But we don't know OP. We don't know how OP reacts, though the way the post is written could be a bit of a hint.
OP could very well be the sweetest guy out there, emotionally balanced etc. Or he could be someone that's quick to anger and have hands that are flapping harder than a hummingbird's wings. We don't know. The friend and the ex do.
Most if not all what we do here in the comments is projecting our own experiences on a situation an OP describes. It's all we can do. Doesn't mean one pov is better than another person's pov.
Ok. Yes, your dad is a jerk. Before you were diagnosed, was he also an asshole? It could be that he is in denial about your condition? He could be having the worst reaction because he is scared? That BS about doctors wanting money and making stuff up is from someone who is really insecure in the world.
But that is him and this is about you. Work with your doctors to see how you can learn to live independently. Start putting together resources that will support you. You're young. Medicine can move fast. There may be some things in the works like drugs or therapies that will make your life much better.
It's not “if you could ever trust someone that lied to your face”
It's “Can someone love you and lie straight to your face?”
The answer is no
Leave the poor woman alone AH.
Yuuuuup! I applaud you, fellow monogamist. If I am with somone and break up, and get with someone else, my loyalty to the previous person, no matter the amount of time or circumstances, is no longer my relationship nor obligation.
You two seem to have a real strong connection, and it's clear that you're into her big time. Here's the deal, it's totally cool to want more from a relationship, but it's also important to respect where the other person is at. If she's not ready for a relationship right now, then you gotta respect that. But that doesn't mean you can't let her know that you're still interested.
It's a delicate balance, you don't want to push her away, but you also don't want to miss out on an opportunity. Here's what you do, bro. Keep doing what you're doing, spending time together and building on your friendship. But also make it clear that you're still interested in her romantically. Let her know that you're happy to keep things as they are, but that you hope she'll change her mind about a relationship in the future.
And listen, if things don't work out between you two, it doesn't mean you've lost something special. You'll always have the memories of your amazing friendship and the work you've done together. And who knows, maybe down the line things will change and you'll be able to take things to the next level. But for now, just enjoy the time you have together and keep being open and honest with her. Good luck, bro!
A couple of points:
Guys don't bleed. Or cry. Or show any emotion…… Ok, maybe a bit overboard but, guys are expected to be solid. Regardless.
“and letting myself explode”
Aye, there's the rub.
Short tempered and both have a lack of communication.
The separation, school? Is another distance period expected? If “yes” its over.
We've restarted our relationship and he understands why I talked to her and believed her side of the story.
We're going to avoid her in the future
You can support strippers without getting a lap dance ?wtf if he’s throwing money that’s all the support you need. Maybe everyone is acting the way they are because we’re not strippers. Ofc u don’t see it as a big deal
I’m not part of the friend group I’ve only went out with them three times. I only know 2 of the girls and most of his guy friends. Would’ve been nice to ask to come but I understand why he wouldn’t have. I won’t be rude or cold but I think distancing myself a little is for the best.
This grace is ill placed. Having children with someone who is unmediated and not monitored by medical professionals and who leaned on you so heavily for stability is ill advised. He has zero coping skills and now your attention is focused on bringing life into the world. As unaware as you were you enabled him and waived his lack of therapy and medication as him “trying”. His issues were swept under the rug and the first sign of his spiraling went unnoticed by you as he has masked his reg flags so well. You need to run and protect your child before you have to co parent with him untreated. If he leaves now you can get legal custody agreement with you as the sole custodian and child support. He will have to go through some hoops to get her back. Unfortunately you are coming from a place of love and trying to handle this as if he is a logical reasonable person and he is NOT and won’t ever be without medical intervention. You need to throw your empathy aside for him and focus on safety and stability for you and your child. Being a single parent is better than you think. You just have to get yourself to the court house and put one foot in front of the other.
I’m so sorry that you’re going through this. Yes he most certainly is checking out other women’s IG pages and thirst traps.
It really could be that he cares for you very much, would not cheat on you, AND goes on these pages. But it’s the lying that’s really bothersome, right.
I’m guessing he’s lying because you said this is a dealbreaker, and he wants to stay with you. You’re both four years from age 25, when the frontal lobe of the brain fully develops. That’s the part that regulates behavior and reduces impulsivity. So some of this is immaturity.
But your trust is broken, isn’t it? So why stay? Won’t that gnaw at you? Maybe breaking up now will make him a better person, more willing to be fully truthful in his next relationship. Maybe he’ll make changes now and be trustworthy down the road. Maybe even you yourself will feel less upset at your SO looking at pictures from time to time. What matters most is that you and your SO are in agreement on your values and goals, that you trust each other and demonstrate commitment to the relationship as you both have defined it. It appears that’s not here anymore for you in this one.
I’m a retired LEO and as many have said they raped you. 1. You were intoxicated 2. Unable to give consent 3. Took your consent to have sex w his twin away 4. Sex w o consent is rape. You did not consent to sex w his twin brother. So the brother is a rapist and your husband conspired to commit rape on an intoxicated woman.
So they have also raped other women the same way. This makes them serial rapist. They knowingly had sex w women w o their consent by deceit.
There is no saving this marriage. Because even if yo undo you’ll wonder exactly how many times it happened. Would they do it now? I know they’re slightly different looking now but if he got you drunk would you be able to notice? Would he drug you to make you unaware it’s happening and then make you believe you were just too tired and you had sex w your husband stop worrying. Etc.
You now know they are capable of deceiving you & others so they can have sex w unknowing women.
Not only did his brother rape you, you now have to ask how many of your BILs GF has your husband done this to? Nothing is unbelievable at this point. You need to leave and file for divorce stating rape as the reason. Don’t hold back. Be if you hide the fact they did this to you (and others) you’re helping them hide the fact they are rapist and have raped other women as well. Don’t let them get away w no one knowing.
Yeah, we were never such a great fit as lovers, but we tried to make it work even though the signs weren't that good…