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How would you feel if you were me?
Well, I am a bit simple in cases like this. Just be practical, you dont really want to do anything after a dental surgery, so i wouldnt worry about cheating. I think it is good to talk about this with him, but I would just keep the things close to myself, tell him it makes you a bit uncomfortable because of their history, but that is it. Plus it might be an idea to get to know the ex, i mean if they are still friends, why not?
Just be open and honest about how you feel and what you think
Help us understand this. You say you have lots of little fights, but how does that happen if you never say anything?
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My SIL has spoken to her ex husband more in the last two years due to their grown children marrying and having babies than in years past lol. And they have always thrown joint parties for graduations and big milestones. Are they each other’s favorite? Nope. Can they get along and laugh and be cool? You bet. It’s called being well adjusted.
This may be a redundant question, but does this make us incompatible?
She wants to on-line in rural areas, and you don't, I'd say thats a pretty big incompatibility. Particularly when neither of you are willing to compromise. Thats a recipe for disaster in an LDR. You aren't on the same page at all.
If someone is depressed it is cruel to exclude them. When I was depressed my family didn't push me aside.
I guess because she has been a great part of my life and I don't want to let go
Yeah fuck. Good call. I didn’t even think about that.
It sounds more like she made a choice to have this affair. She didn't just do things with him once, she did it the entire time she was away. Multiple times. Then she decided she wasn't going to tell you, she's been lying to you for 2-3 years acting like it didn't happen.
How would you react if she told you right after she got home? She knew if she didn't tell you, you'd be too conflicted to leave. She took that choice away from you years ago.
Keep in mind that if this woman truly loved you, she would not have lived that double life and had sex with him over and over. She behaved like your feelings didn't matter, like you didn't exist.
Why do you want to stay with her?
What she needs to do and what sacrifices she has to make is becoming independent. Why do you expect that her mum should do everything for her and she can just continue to demand more? Relationships are give and take once you are an adult.
He’s the one that told me himself he gets a haircut every two months. I didn’t mean to make it sound like I’m upset that I want to cut it right now and he’s not letting me or something, because I don’t. As I mentioned I even asked him, if I learn how to do it, would you let me? He didn’t even answer. I have nothing for this ex I was just thinking about the difference in the situation. My ex wanted me to do it for him because he thought it would be fun, even suggesting I should learn first if I wasn’t confident enough. I didn’t want to and told him to go get his usual from his barber. If they love you they wouldn’t mind. All I see is he just cares about his looks (which he does). There are many times my boyfriend has lied to me and showed me that he is selfish, he is also really bad at communicating or doesn’t communicate at all unless it is something that concerns him (which is always just about guys) This might look like I’m the problem but I hope there is someone who reads this and can understand what I am trying to say. This isn’t just about this haircut situation guys. I think I just need confirmation that he doesn’t love me at all because I keep telling myself otherwise.