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no, it isn't. just because it's normalized doesn't mean that the majority of couples are fine with it.
Calling it a kink is absurd without any further context, and taking OP at face value. But even if OP has a mommy kink, blurted it out and didn't get the response he was hoping for, her reaction is immature and absurd as well. It's also perfectly okay for her to be uncomfortable with it, but a simple “yo I'm not into the mommy thing” works. Of course she has the personal right to feel that way, and we also have the right to think she's being over the top about it.
It's a god damn word. OP didn't mean it. It's really not a big deal.
Jow old are you ever?
Ah. Mistakes were made.
This is going to be your life. Your fiances brother is going to have a panic attack every time he wants your fiance's attention.
Really stop and think of you want this to be your life. This guy bangs on your door if your fiance doesn't answer the phone. Your fiance will Gove him anything of yours he wants.
Inth8nk the brother is jealous of you and doing this deliberately, and your fiance is letting it happen.
Think long and hot about this being your life before you walk down the aisle. Canceling a wedding is easier than divorce.
Crabs in a bucket
You're engaged to both your fiance and his brother it sounds and I don't think they will ever separate the way you want, you will either need to break off the engagement or learn to live! with this situation.
Personally, everyone involved in this needs a ton of therapy, especially your BIL and Finace. Why is your BIL not seeing a professional to keep his mental health under control?
GTFO
Seriously, girl, RUN
Whatever is going on with this guy, none of it is good. He is either trying to manipulate/control you, or he is becoming a religious radical, and both of those mean only bad, bad, and increasingly worse things for you.
Put your pants on, thank him for the memories, and peace the F out before you get stuck in this quicksand.
You need immediate professional mental health services. That’s not an insult. He stalked you & plotted to rape you. The only sane response is to run far away from him. Because you are not doing that, you need someone that is professionally trained in mental health to help you before one of several absolutely horrible likely outcomes happens here.
His actions definitely scream self-centered. He put in for our home state so I could get help with the kids and he said, sarcastically, that he was sorry it took 3 tours, 8 years, to finally put the family first. So I told him to listen to what he just said. It took almost a decade for him to put us first and he just sat there. I have hopes it actually clicked with him. He is saying and doing all the right things right now, which is to be expected because he knows he's fucked it all up and I want to believe he's sincere but I've lost so much trust and faith in him that I'm just waiting for the shoe to drop.
Your other comment you mentioned there not being any sign of him being supportive and other than helping with the kids while I do school work and trying to do what he can around the house to make things easier for me, I don't know what else has happened support wise. He has supported my schooling, he supports me getting out of the house for breaks, he helps around the house but beyond that there's nothing. I don't even know if there is anything he can be supportive with beyond that other than to stop fucking up
While I agree with you, I think a lot of redditors feel that the obvious disparity in money spent and effort, while also voicing high expectations, suggests a level of selfishness that a conversation is likely not going to fix. If He shows up with a cheap robe I can guarantee she’s going to be pissed, while also thinking that it was perfectly fine for her to give such a low effort gift because “it’s your duty as a boyfriend to give me nice things.”
In saying this I am not discouraging OP from having a conversation, but I would encourage him to observe her likely negative reaction and decide whether this is the kind of long term partner he wants.
Yep actual adults laugh off things that aren't actually real issues and then continue to enjoy their partner instead of getting possessive and borderline abusive. Soooo desperate of them having their happy and healthy relationships
It isn’t your dad!! Your mom is out of line and not just nosey but unhealthily concerned about your performance in bed- she needs to develop some boundaries and respect the both of you. What the heck is that about? I can see the rest is all heavy handed joking, yea, even the paedo bit because it isn’t true, since you are definitely of age. Brush it all off but have a word with your mum and the jokesters.
It’s totally fair to request no more updates.
Strange. Beyond weird. She's got mental baggage my dude. Run!
I'm 100% sure that your intelligence is ONLY above reproach to yourself.
While i agree with that, that's not the norm at all in North America or Europe. I can't think of one social get together in the last 30 years where someone wasn't drinking that one beer or wine but it's ok because its only one and they aren't driving for awhile. While online or TV messaging might be fully abstaining if driving, that is not the social norm anywhere and that's a big part of the problem.
I’m taking a stand for her now. Am I not explaining this correctly?
Ye I understand what you mean, and I think you’re right, it does seem that she clearly wants to be more than just friends, so I should nip it in the bud now while it’s still relatively ‘fresh’
Thank you!
Kick her out?
The girl is in your house, already said you can have the daughter, she is chatting up guys, using common interests that you had to impress other guys?
Fuck that, get her to leave.
May be worth getting it in writing that she is letting you have your daughter, it seems that she will be more focused on horse riding anyway.