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Birth Date: 1997-06-25
Body Type: bodyTypeAverage
Ethnicity: ethnicityAsian
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Personally I don't know from experience with dating a female as I am pansexual but more leaning towards males. But I have autism to and honestly we can't really feel feelings as much as people without them, it's like we don't care, we do care we just don't really show it to be honest with you. It's not really something someone can control to be fully honest. It's not really his fault he doesn't care mental illness does that unfortunately. I mean if you want to break up with him that's not my right to say, but just understand he doesn't do it because he doesn't care, his mental illness makes.it way harder for him to care. This is also coming from someone that also has autism and has the same thing.
His loss.
Its possible you are right but its not worth the effort to find out. Moving on, and living well is your best revenge.
Honor his wish, don't talk to him again even if he contacts you.
Having a partner means you feel safe and loved with them. If he makes you feel scared then it's obvious you're scared of him. Please fine a partner who you feel safe with
He goes on dates with them and goes to their house etc. What is ti's?
he used to be all about it so it makes me feel like he’s just not attracted to me enough anymore. he also never helps me finish after and some other things that is unfortunately making me feel like it’s the latter.
Good for you for acting it on it now. On reddit, people have waited years before they found some sense.
He gotta go,
its 1 thing of you know him just losing his job but he got his job back and he doesn't want to help out with 2 bills… what did he think? You would continue to pay all the bills?
She didn’t go through with it, but mentally she decided that she wants to cheat on you. She took time and thought over your 8 years together and made the conscious decision to throw that away to have sex with this guy. She doesn’t have the (bullshit) excuse of a drunken mistake or something, she took time and thought it out and decided that sex with this guy was more important than what you have made with her for 8 years.
Whether or not she had sex with you, she’s already been unfaithful. Don’t approach this situation as “she didn’t cheat because she didn’t have sex.” She’s already been unfaithful and decided how little she values the relationship.
Is the relationship salvageable? Probably not. I’m a firm believer that cheating relationships can’t be saved. There’s always going to be some level of broken trust, and there’s always going to be some level of doubt in her mind of if she should’ve slept with him. I would walk away.
In my experience, no one I've ever talked to is truly “ready” to be a dad. The reality is that you have a son. He will need a loving father. You want to be that person, so, now it's up to you to do so.
Your GF seems like she's ready to help you face this,and that's her decision. So now is just a matter of supporting each other.
Go be the best dad you can be, OP!! You got this!
I had to do physical therapy because even fingering was painful for me. After a few months I dont really have any problems with it
t t t trolling
I'm not saying to stay in your own lane at all. I'm saying that this is behaviour that has nothing to do with the age of the person. 66 is a bit early for the onset of dementia for example We see posts here about youngsters being pestered by their GF or BF who wants to know everything and be with them all the time. We see people of all ages who have communication problems with their partner.
I'm not giving my opinion I'm stating facts and calling out ageism.
I wouldn't. You still need to online your own life. Maybe find a way to spend more time each week, even if it's just an added Zoom call.
How often do you find yourself wanting to rape someone?
> THAT was the rule.
It's almost like it depends on the person and the relationship. Kind of like I said. You know not everyone lives the same way you do right? That it's chill to have different house rules?
Obviously she didn't bake one cookie but there is that chance she took one in for him.
I'm not saying it is the case and I do sort of think I'm reading too much into but I'm dealing with the way it always used to make me feel.
You do not love her if you encourage her obesity. And you went behind your wife's back.
First of all, just because somebody is beautiful on the outside doesn’t mean that words don’t hurt, or they might have days where they don’t feel attractive. That is how they feel, and doesn’t correlate to how you feel. Secondly, his comment was also misogynistic, but carry-on, since it’s all so fucking funny.
From now on use your brain to judge the state of your relationship as well, not just your heart.
If she can’t control her tongue this is the least bit she should worry about. The people where I online would beat the shit outta her. If anything you taught her a lesson to watch her tongue bc I GUARANTEE there’s people who don’t put up with that bs and I’m one of those
He’s putting more energy and work into the relationship he has with her then the one he has with you. He maybe having sex with you but do you really want to be the side piece in your own relationship? You deserve so much more than this, especially from someone you are going to be marrying.
Don’t tie yourself for life to someone that’s putting another woman first.
sounds like you've inadvertently poked at something that happened to her you don't know about
That’s the thing, at this age people DO drift apart and break up. And you know what, that is okay. He can’t prevent your relationship ending by keeping you locked away in a box. You need to find yourself. If you and he grow and still fit, great, if not, that is okay too.
He should’ve kept the kittens and moved the gf out.
Go back to court. Simple.
When you ask a cryptic question you should expect a cryptic answer. But just as you're entitled to have your expectations in a relationship so is she. Nothing in the info provided indicates that this woman needs therapy, but then you never quite get around to telling us what grievous sin she committed in December. The early 20's are a time of personal exploration for most people, so she's probably on point in saying that at 21 she doesn't want to be tied down to a relationship. This just didn't work out. Maybe it was because the timing wasn't right – to be fair, you're even younger than she is – and in the future you'll reconcile. Or maybe the two of you just had such different ideas about relationships that it can never be.
You shouldn't feel guilty. You don't actually want, nor are you mature enough for a serious relationship, or else you wouldn't be “on and off” for 6 months. You just want someone convenient to touch your penis on a regular basis.
If she REALLY REALLY loved OP she wouldn't give a damn about her ex coming back, right?
This is a terrible victim blaming take.
Absolutely not!
Leave.
You have been love bombed. Break up and block him. You deserve better than this.
Who are you to try and dictate how they conduct the personal aspects of their marriage? They're happy and they presumably never exposed you to their other partners. You don't get to tell them they're not allowed to be poly any more than they can dictate any aspect of your upcoming marriage. You should see a therapist.
Why do you still follow and keep up with her on social media?
That's a valid concern for her. Saving for her education and any unexpected costs associated with that is more important than going away on a trip that costs more than she's comfortable spending. Being mindful of her spending is being financially responsible.
Personally I'd recommend getting a lawyer so they can help you make objective decisions about situation. I worked in a family law office as an assistant for a bit and the best service we sold according to my boss was rational decision making for our clients. So just an idea.
Finding a good therapist to work through your feels might also be beneficial.
I wish that we, as a society, were more repulsed by idiot bullies than body size. You can’t spell and you’re an asshole to people you don’t even know? But the real sin here is that OP struggles with thyroid & weight? Yeah no. ? U-G-L-Y, you ain’t got no alibi, you ugly… in your soul where it fuckin counts. And we already know you aren’t OP’s doctor, because LOSE means to cease to have or retain something and LOOSE means the screw in your moronic head isn’t tightly fixed in place… and a doctor would know the difference.
The plastic ones that you can put stuff in.
Just don't cook for him. You don't owe him a damned thing.
Watching porn isn’t cheating unless the two of you have discussed it and agreed to view it as cheating and that it’s forbidden in your relationship.
Has anyone on this sub ever tried talking to their so? Like “you hurt my feelings by doing blank, I want us to do this together and I'd like your input about blank”. Like every post I read, not just this one, seems like it could be solved or at least explored if yall just talked to each other…
I smell a manipulation tactic…. Even if she is sincere, she needs therapy, not a romantic relationship. I'd let her go.
I guess I was holding on to hope that we can fix this. Like I said, if I were in his position I would be mortified if I wasn't trusted because i made a mistake and I would do anything to show him he could.
Nobody’s calling YOU toxic, people are just pointing out that this is an unfortunate RESULT of toxic masculinity in our culture. It’s not your fault for being conditioned to this type of masculinity, but please know that it’s totally okay to cry and your gf breaking up with you is also a result of toxic masculinity. She should be able to see you as a person with emotions and support that.
Then what advice are you looking for? How to ignore your SO having sex with other people when stressed? I'm sure there are books about it.
I totally get that. It might be worth bringing up with your therapist. They may be able to give you tools to help you combat those fears.
You have no idea how much I've wanted to read something as reasonable as this. All these people insisting that somehow he must like something off the menus. Wtf? I'm getting a slight hint of virtue signaling wokeness from many of these and that's because the “alleged wronged party” here is a minority. People are just afraid to call her shit out about her behaviour because it involves something as culturally sensitive as her food. Somehow if it or her were criticized, that would be “bigoted”.
I am an African and when I say Africans eat ALL parts of an animal, I mean ALL OF IT. This is often not sitting well with other people of different ethnicities and races, even in my country. Do we hold it against them? Of course not. This woman is being ridiculous, controlling and childish. Let's not be selective about whose BS we call out for what it is.
You can look to see when the video was taken even the early phones had time and date stamps thanks to many lawsuits. Now this does question, why now she still has it if from college. But maybe to ger these are just memories that she like “flick the bean”. But now the ball is in your court do you trust her, that this is an old video and how do you handle this.
because words mean nothing. absolutely nothing. actions will always tell you the whole picture.
I would be telling my husband if he leaves he can stay with his gf. He is having an emotional affair and is planning on making it physical. He doesn’t care for or respect you.
She should be. I don't get why she's invited.
Check yourself in for some AA meetings. Get a hold on your drinking before it really becomes a problem. Focus on fixing the things in your life that you can. See if you can fix your job situation and lessen your stress. Show her actual steps to improving the problem. Not just apologies.
End the relationship.
Tell her that her behaviour is inappropriate for anyone who is supposed to be in a committed relationship.
Tell her that she is now free to continue fucking the friend (be honest you really think she hasn’t already – there is no reason for her to spend so long there, especially over nights, and couple that with his end of long term relationship, and her sudden change of feelings, they fucked)
I’m guessing that you online together, so tell her that she has 30 minutes to pack a bag and leave. You can tell her that she can come back on the weekend to grab the rest of her stuff.
And tell her that you never want to see or hear from her again.
Then tell everyone that she has been cheating on you (she has been emotionally cheating on you if not physically) so you ended the relationship.
You have already fought? What was the end result?
Still I will reiterate, you can do what you want, but if you will keep spending holidays with your ex, this will sabotage any relationship, with any partner. This is just the reality, whatever you decide to do, keep this fact in mind as inevitable.
Well, if it's just him wanting ro try something new, offer to reverse roles and he can be on the receiving end. Then you can compare notes
Holy shit…what the fuck?
She doesn't appreciate you deep cleaning the house for four hours. She picks out one small spot. You feel like your efforts went unnoticed and we're diminished to missing a spot. You were happy with the work you did and she couldn't even acknowledge it. Let alone thank you.
Then, when you tell her how it made you feel she gives you some half assed bullshit line: “Sorry but it's actually your fault because when you clean it makes me feel bad.”
Bro. Seriously. That would have set me off more than the “You missed a spot.”
Tell her again “Hey, it makes me feel unappreciated when I clean the house for four hours and you point out one spot I missed while overlooking the rest of the work that I put in. Then you apologized…Your apology was shallow and deflecting. I don't want to make you feel bad. I want you to know that what you say and how you say it really matters to me. I did this for us and I was hoping you would be happy about it. If you feel like you can't do more to help out around here then let's work something out together. Maybe if I clean during the day you could plan dinner and cook. Hell, even just some genuine appreciation and acknowledgement would be plenty for me.”
please just stop commenting bc you clearly didn’t read anything i said. i said WE don’t want the photos up and WE don’t want our son to find them. i’m posting it because my fiancé does not have social media and we wanted to both post the situation. you fr have no comprehension skills
If you have to ask then it sounds like you already have reservations about it.
Listen, I’m a gay woman, I have a pretty good gaydar (it’s a bullshit concept but let’s roll with it for fun). This is fruity. Your boyfriend just described how I felt about my gal pals before I came out.
Also, what a misogynistic asshat. You deserve the world, this man isn’t it!!
eesh. That's a lot.
Your cat is having behavioral issues. I would do a few things:
1- appt with the vet to discuss the behavioral issues (peeing in random spots is behavioral).. also put the litter box in a safe and quiet place
2- get the pheromone spray thing to plug into the outlet to create a calmer environment.
3- create a safe place (bed) for the cat to rest and look out the window.
4- slow winks to the cat always help they know you are safe
friend agreed to stay away from me / us, but threatened to report fiancé to the police if he tells me the truth.
Your ex friend is a coward loser.
This is why men and women cannot be “best friends” like this. I'll take my downvotes. But none of this surprised me.
U can borrow my projector if u want
I don’t usually recommend this, but you need to go NC. As for Allison, that ship might have already sailed, but try to get her proof that she was being lied to.
Do you know how many women in my day that put their husband through medical school to have him leave and get nothing from it. You are 20 years old, do not sugar daddy any guy in college. He is a grown man he’s even older than you are. So I would tell him no sugar daddy you have your own journey, but you would be more than happy to have a relationship with him.
Have you ever cheated on someone?
I wouldn't move to a new more expensive place with her until you sit down and discuss how you know relationships to be and hearing her out on how she thinks relationships are meant to be…
I would start out with, “I feel like we are experiencing some cultural differences in our relationship and I want us to talk about the role of money in relationships so we can come to a compromise between both of our expectations. For Australia, being in a relationship means that couples pay shared bills together, that are divided based on income. Individual expenses are handled individually. Dates are paid by whomever is planning, with situational exceptions. Trips are a mix of that as well.
In the Ukraine how do couples handle thier finances, can you please lay it out for me?”
Her explosiveness however, makes me feel like you are being used, and she is avoiding losing that… But it could just be her assuming you should know, what she inherently knows about how couples divide money and not understanding that you genuinely don't think that way.
You can empathize and support him emotionality but you cannot take care of him. He is responsible for his mental health. You’re right, sounds like he needs therapy: he has unresolved trauma. Honestly, he doesn’t sound like he was ready to enter a new relationship with you. I know this hurts and is very very hot (and unfair) to you.
If he won’t get help, you’re only options are ti stay and tolerate it or leave. Easy ti say, hard to do. You need to make yourself your #1 priority.
What you are describing sounds Demi however. Demi’s find no one but the one they have feelings for attractive. But even if not, chin up. Get through this, heal, embrace life and someday some one will come along when least expected and you will feel that spark again.