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Birth Date: 1997-09-25
Body Type: bodyTypeThin
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Subculture: subcultureBears
Well, if it were me I would not be getting married, and I'd be getting that engagement ring back!!!
So first, I would seriously consider if there's anything she can do about the chin at this point. I am unfamiliar with how cosmetic surgery works, but if you think there may be a way for her surgeon to make a tweak, then you can consider firstly praising her appearance and acknowledging how it's healing and then secondly giving specific feedback only if she asks for it. If she doesn't ask for more specific feedback, then just encourage and let her be happy.
if it doesn't seem like she can change it, I wouldnt say anything negative. I would focus on the healing process and how her face has improved through that. I would say “I love it! You look beautiful” And if she asks about how it compares to before then I would say “I have always loved the way that you looked”. I wouldn't say it's better now or before – I would honestly avoid that entirely and just focus on verbally appreciating her appearance.
Do you happen to know why she changed her chin though? I have never heard of chin surgery. But the knowing the reasons or asking her may help you continue the conversation while also in learning how to better empathize with her.
a relationship should never be your main focus at 20. that’s what my current boyfriend and i both believe, and why we have worked out so far. if your boyfriend is in it for the long run, he’ll view your schooling as securing his future as well, and be less threatened by it. if you are his main focus right now, but he is not yours, that is his problem for not keeping busy enough and having his own ambitions. love feels great, and i understand being obsessed with a person and wanting to spend all your time with them but that breeds codependency and resentment. it sounds like you’re bending over backwards to fill his cup when he should have other hobbies/interests/activities so your relationship isn’t so unbalanced. you and your schedule are not causing this strain, his inability to accept and accommodate your schedule and keep himself busy when you’re not available is.
why would u tell him lmao
Finish this convo in DMS? I messaged you!!
In response to “I don't know what to do or who to talk to” 1) eat less, move more 2) talk to a nutritionist and a therapist
Still could be a pit mix seeing as they don’t know the dad dog. We’ll never know and it’s still not breed I’d put with cats either. Love huskies too but know this is possible too even if it’s slim
So a 30yo woman married a 21yo man and forced him to have a child with her when he wasn't ready?
If the genders were reversed, this sub would be telling you to run.
You were at different stages of life and she forced you to have a child when you weren't ready. Now she's using a mistake you made as fodder in arguments. That doesn't sound healthy at all.
You need to be clear to her that you've already apologised and made every effort to ensure your son was fine after and you don't deserve to be punished for eternity. If she's going to continue bringing it up and punishing you, you need to decide if this is a relationship you can stay in.
If you are doing this because you are about to have a child together, it is the worst decision possible. The ONLY reason you would try is because this is what YOU want for you, not what you want for your child.
You talk about having a step dad but it not being the same as a real dad. But what is worse is parents who stayed together for the kids. You did not get to see that situation so you only see one side of the scenario but I can tell you, sadly as a parent who did stay for a long time for the kids, it messed them up so much more. And we did not last. It is so much worse now. Separating earlier would have made for much better coparenting relationships, happier homes and hence happier kids.
Why did you move straight back in together? It’s like you are trying to carry on like nothing happened. But it did. Your relationship ended. He moved on with other people. Did you ever consider taking it slow? Staying in separate houses but spending some time together to seeing if YOU want to renew your relationship with the person who did this to you at your most vulnerable time. You are having a child. But that baby is not going to even notice if you online together. You have time to think about this, to work on things. DO NOT LET HIM PRESSURE YOU ON TIMING. He forfeited the right to have any say. And you are letting him pressure you. And if you are just continuing on as before, as if nothing happened, then you are putting yourself under so much needless pressure. It would be so naked to make a clear headed decision in this situation. I would seriously consider making him move back out and taking your time developing your relationship again and seeing what it is you want. And counselling obviously.
Did he get STI tests since he slept around after he left you? That is very important since you are pregnant and there are some that are very dangerous for your unborn child.
You just don’t get matching tattoos with a partner it’s the kids of death.
Right? There are a lot of “is this rape?” posts on Reddit that make me wary to advise (too much gray area or implied consent, etc) but this one is not even slightly questionable. 100 percent rape.
My take as well- its not about the sitter, but about the wife dealing with aging, insecurity and jealousy.
She keeps trying to grind this girl down to prove shes 'better than her' in some way. Gets enough of a dopamine hit from the petty victories to ignore the fact that she is falling down the rabbit hole.
Doesnt matter how much the ex-sitter suffers, wifey is still aging, bitter, and mean. The harder she grinds, the worse her own problems become. Spiralling behavior- never a good sign.
I'm so sorry. This can be pretty complicated. Is she suffering from depression? Having kids is a huge stressor no matter what. If you have a 2 y.o., is it possible she's having a long bout of PPD that needs to be addressed? A lack of confidence in her body could also be a problem. Would she be open to counseling?
Cool story bro, needs more dragons
She knew she didn't marry a good dude. Maybe when she was 20. But not at 30.
She knows. But she is willing to do nothing rather than blow her life up. .
As is her right.
She wanted us to comfort her and not point out what she didn't want to hear.
THANK YOU! You're the only one I've seen who's mentioned the fact that he broke it off over the phone!
Leave him. Now. Once a cheater, always a cheater. Source: life experience
Do not have children with this man. I repeat, DO NOT HAVE CHILDREN WITH THIS MAN! Your body would be put through the wringer with pregnancy and he will never shut up about how it’s changed. Being a factual person is code for “asshole” and you deserve someone who builds you up not brings you down.