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It only works if neither has feelings anymore. I will always love my ex deeply but I know he did not feel the same so even just being friends would be too painful
What the fuck?
Damn, that's new.
Imagine if you could decide not breaking with someone all by yourself.
Like, what does he think will happen?
That you will say “okey you don't want to break so let's stay together”?
Yikes.
Stay firm, declare your intentions to move on and go to live with your family of another person that makes you feel secure, just in case he tries to confront you face to face. If that happens, don't allow him near you (specially when you are alone) and tell him that you don't want anything to do with him anymore, and if he keeps trying to contact you you will issue a (those legal things that force him to be separated from you by law)
This sounds extremely weird to me.
Some random ideas that come to my mind after reading this are: – they are all covering for each other with their wives and each have an AP that they go and see on Saturdays. – they are into illegal activities and they aren’t friends at all, just business partners – they are apart of some kind of male only club, but don’t want anyone (wives) to know.
Honestly, I just find it strange that he spends every Saturday with these people yet they aren’t friendly to you. One would think that your husband and them are good friends, from the amount of time they spend together, so wouldn’t they want to get to know his wife, even just superficially?
Have you noticed any new behaviour from your husband (beside Saturday night)? Eg. more spending, more $ coming in, change in style of dress, etc.
Have you looked these friends up on social media to see if they have a family etc? Also, where did he meet them?
Don’t be rude.
Let go of the idea that you have to argue with him about why you're leaving, or that you have to convince him that you're behaving reasonably. You know why you're leaving. And you know that you've made it very clear why you're unhappy and it's not your fault he didn't take you seriously.
Accept that your in-laws are going to bash you. That's their problem. You don't need to talk to them or accept their messages. Just block them. Your husband can deal with them.
Stop caring what other people think about you when you're making the choices that you know are right for you. These people who won't like it are not on your side and their approval or disapproval is not your problem.