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Honestly it sounds like you need to end it. There’s nothing wrong with what he likes and want and needs, but there IS something wrong with him not being honest with you so you could make an informed choice. I’m really sorry this is happening.
This makes it sound, to me, that he definitely has gay tendencies but is keeping it repressed for whatever reason.
Is there family or someone who was/is in his life that has made him averse to being able to feel safe being openly gay/bi? Obviously it's not you, you seem very understanding and were even willing to be open so he could explore that, but maybe a parent or friend or something?
It just seems to me, the whole literally “keeping my crossdressing stuff and peen toys in the closet” thing is a bit extreme for someone who is “just into the kink and it's no big deal”. He's hiding it for some reason or other…
Anyway! I totally understand if this is a deal breaker. I mean, you're a very supportive wife and have tried all sorts of forms of compromise/support, yet he's still pretty much camming and exchanging pron behind your back, which isn't fair to you. Also, what if someday in the future he decides that he is truly, fully gay, and ends up leaving you after many years of marriage because he stopped himself from exploring his true self, yanno?
I don't know what to really say honestly, but I wish you good luck!
Are you really under the impression that you understand it better than op the LAWYER who read it in its entirety??
You can’t fix how she is with family or husband, but you can fix how she treats you.
Everyone else lets her walk all over them, you should show some teeth and not allow that like when she yelled at you.
If she’s afraid of you she’s more likely to watch herself, and in the future that will extend to your kids.
It might upset the in-laws and warn your husband before you visit next time, but it will do more good than harm for you down the road.
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It would have been good if the friend helped HER voice her concerns to OP.
That's not what happened.
So he has pleasure thinking about his own daughter licking another woman's vagina
This man is a pedophile. He's literally fantasising about his child daughter sexually
God help you. Run.
What drug can consistently delay orgasm without preventing an erection?
He’s genuinely one of the most observant, kind, thoughtful, and smart people I have met in my life and I don’t think I’ve ever met someone so insanely similar to me.
Bullshit. If he was so kind, thoughtful and generous he would've rejected his advances and not had sex with you. Obviously he's a flattered that a 18 year old finds him sexy but he shouldn't have take advantage of you.
This is known as Ephebophilia where a older person takes active in mid to late adolescents.
You are barely out of your teens why tf the you are hooking you with a guy who's the age of your dad. Daddy issues ig?? Bad childhood?
There's nothing right with this relationship. Break if off and try to be in therapy.
Wtf do you mean are you right in not wanting to pay for the hotel? Did you think people would be like “yeah you should definitely be paying in full!”
First off what is wrong with your place? I know his place doesn’t work because he quite obviously married but is your place out of the question?
So many of these posts are from really dangerously insecure/clueless women and it’s really scary 🙁 Please have more respect for yourself.
From what you're saying to where you were just ships passing through the night and he's filling his time since he doesn't see you with spending all his money on these Fantasy Girls. You either need to give him a massive wake up call or dump him. One of you needs to move out depending on Whose place it is and who's on the lease if you rent.
A NURSERY? I have a 3 month old and there’s no chance in hell I’d leave her with someone who mistreated me and has a rule that I can’t be present with my child over 7 hours away.
My 4 year old gets maybe an overnight once or twice a year with family that I like, I can’t imagine having a MIL be so audacious with my child. Nope nope nope. This needs to be a firm boundary, you are well within your rights not even tactfully say hell no.
Does he think his mother wouldn’t poison your child against you? How about the emotional abuse she’s obviously inflicted on those around her, does he think that’ll change? Because I can tell you it won’t. Abusers get worse after big life changes. Tell her she doesn’t need to worry about the financial burden of creating a nursery because that will not be happening.
What are you, their parent? If you're angry at your partner you go calm down and come back to have a calm adult conversation about what bothered you. You don't try to punish them.
Your partner and you are a team, you work on your issues together through communication.
Punishing your partner is unhealthy as hell and a sure way to make them wanna leave.
If she says she’s happy this way, then you need to decide if you want to tie yourself down to someone who is not desirable to you. You also appear to be more health focused with eating habits. You need to consider if this is his she plans to feed any possible children. You’re too young to settle for less than you want. Your whole life is ahead of you. Take your time and find someone who doesn’t need changing.
Just tell her straight up . Dude ain't interested .
You don't have to wait. But if you're going to, you need to wait until she reaches out to you.
Buddy, if I were her I’d have left your ass years ago. I can’t believe you don’t understand what verbal abuse is. And don’t say that you do, Bc if you did, you wouldn’t be verbally abusing your wife.
yeah i’ve been cheated on before. exes picking a video game over me and not responding for hours. maybe even watching their location move with not responding back.
Why do you feel numb? What has gone wrong in your perspective?
You already have thrown in the towel but not left.
It was also sabotaged from the start because you didn’t choose someone you were attracted to.
Stop wasting time because time can’t fix your current issues.
they weren't even dating at the time
how original! a man going for a significantly younger girl because she matches his maturity level and she outgrows him? haven’t heard that one before!
Wow, did you even read the post?
Most likely wants to know her grandkids. I don’t think it’s that complicated. I would be more concerned about the bio dad’s motivation than hers.
Thank you, I appreciate your thoughts.
Tell me??
Think he’s crying because he’s in denial of his sexual preferences and is shaming himself afterwards each time
Well then you cant promise her a committed relationship. A simple way around this would be hey i promise that if I ever think of acting on cheating, i will leave you first.
Well then you cant promise her a committed relationship. A simple way around this would be hey i promise that if I ever think of acting on cheating, i will leave you first.
There’s a reason he’s been married four times hon
My Nan is incredibly messy and I've heard a ton of stories about it from my mum. It was so dirty I went in once growing up. Her three daughters turnt out being: 1) messy and a bit dirty, 2) disgustingly dirty bordering needing to be burnt down, and 3) (my mother) the cleanest person you've every met.
Don't judge her by her parents lack of cleanliness
He's definitely keen. If you are too, then make it clear.
Honestly. This man is nearly 30 years old. He takes money from you that you desperately need, won't give it back and is belittling you if you complain rightfully. Just cut your losses and move on.
“No, I have a boyfriend. Thank you tho”
You said you have a boyfriend… why not use that?