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You should never stop doing things for yourself. It doesn't matter who you are with.
You already know deep down what you need to do. You are seeking confirmation on your thoughts and feelings. Now this is just me personally, but I'd be livid and there would no longer be a wedding or relationship afterwards, nothing but scorched earth of what remained of the memories, but thats just me. In the end its your choice you know yourself best and whats best for your future. Good luck man
Does he have immune diseases you know of? Was he infected once before?
Well he’s cheating on you, and since he gave you stds, he’s probably cheating on you with multiple other women (or men) I’d recommend the ol’ “thanks for giving me chlamydia you pos, hope it was worth it” and walking out the door.
And that's why I said she should probably dump him for it.
Beneficiaries only apply to life insurance, when the person dies. All other insurance policies pay out to the individual who's named on the policy, or their gaurdian.
It’s OK for you to have firm boundaries about this. You get to decide what you are OK with. You have expressed you’re not OK with the arrangement, how did he respond to that? Does he show that he really cares about how you feel? Or does he brush off your feelings as being unreasonable and you’re silly?
Female high body count is linked with ability of pairbonding, ability to sustain ltr or marriage, concept of telegony etc.
People can ask everything to their partner. You owe nothing but honesty to your partner.
I kindly advise you to look at scientific papers about relationship between female partner count and pairbonding,telegony, divorce rate.
I really dont understand how western society forcing themselves to believe female and male are same
You will always have to have permission.
Most people think that when you fall in love with someone, you stay exactly as you were in the beginning, but alk relationships go through an ebb and flow. Only you can figure out if that's what this is – just throwing it out there because it's real, and part of the reason relationships take work.
Intimacy is an important part of desire. Feeling wanted, needed, loved, safe, comfortable are all parts of that too.
Emotional connections in relationships are critical for them to last, but so is communication. Try to figure out what you're missing, and then talk to him about it. Who knows, maybe he's missing something too. Work on making things better together. Good luck! ❤️
She called CPS on him and was violent with you. He has every right not to want her in the home and feel he is literally unsafe from her. What if her next accusation gets him accused of sexually abusing her? She can't accuse him if he's literally not there.
Did I seriously f up by having her over?
Yes you did. All the other kids and your husband who suffered at her rage deserved a hell of a lot better
Small potatoes not post worthy sounds like a normal relationship to me
So so untrue. People cheat for all sorts of reasons. Deficiencies within themselves – which a small portion may be deficiencies within the marriage, but mostly it’s their own issues.
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Yeh it’s unfortunate I have to let them go. I think I’ll still remain friends with them all, but just not to go to any of the social gatherings that might include her, sad I’ll be missing out though :/
People let’s say it louder for those in the back. It’s about the person not the company. If your GF wants to cheat, she is going to cheat. You can set all the boundaries in the world, but if she wants to cheat she is going to cheat. And if she doesn’t cheat on you on this trip and wants to she’ll just create another opportunity.
OP either you trust your GF or you don’t, it’s really that simple. Your insecurities about your own self-worth are not helping the situation either. I don’t necessarily think you’re overreacting, but just remember it takes two to cheat and it is a choice. So yeah either trust your GF or don’t. 2 weeks is not that long also. Most wouldn’t want to throw away a 2 year relationship over that.
are you her boyfriend in disguise? HmmmmMmmMmMmMm
Let’s take what your bf or anyone here thinks about living with a partner out of the equation.
What do you want? Do you want to live! with a partner? Do you want to live! with a partner prior to marriage (assuming you want to be married)?
If yes to either of these and he’s of the opposite view then you’re not compatible. Doesn’t matter what “most” (or your boyfriend’s blanket statement about half the population) guys think or want.
I think I’d be more charitable toward your bf if he said “I am not ready for cohabitating but here’s what would get me more ready/what I would want for that to look like” or “I don’t see myself living with someone. How do you feel about that?” Because that would show him taking responsibility for his own behavior and feelings and having a conversation (or several) with you. But his broad generalization mixed with gross language would have me re-thinking the whole relationship.
You’re really conflating this here by saying things like “he wants to throw all this into the bin for having a weird relationship with a naive student.” That’s not what’s happening. You are not in a relationship with this person and it really doesn’t sound like he’s expressing to you that he’d like to be. This all sounds very, very one sided.
Strange that I’m preoccupied with what? Researching people I talk to? You should do the same. That’s how you find stuff out about people. It’s called doing research.
Uh, why wouldn't a parent text his babysitter occasionally? He's the one who's home when she comes over, so a text here and there to coordinate is neither suspicious, nor grounds for setting up hidden surveillance.
I agree his reaction to the question was over the top, but once Reddit has deemed someone “guilty”, everything that person does is the most suspicious thing ever no matter how good a reason that person has to do whatever they're doing. In this case, texting the babysitter on occasion.
Yeah, I'm aware that shelters exist. But does “hey just be homeless” sound like good advice to you? Honestly?
The fact he knew your passcode is scary. Change your password on anything you had on your phone. You don’t know what he looked at; sm, bank information, etc.
It all comes down to behaviors between you too. Hopefully you two don’t burn out each other fast. Learn to compromise and understand each other is important
not in exchange, and I also didn't really offer, she asked me if I would let her borrow the money (which in her defense she already has paid me back for)
Why do you need to ask what she's looking at? She's not “hiding” things. She wants privacy because she isn't a child. I'm more concerned with your concern over her phone. If she has nothing to hide WHY DO YOU CARE?
I just doubt that just before the friends’ wedding was the best time to test his newfound spine. He knew that the bride and groom wanted Bob at the wedding. He could have just let it go and ignored Bob, for his friends’ sake. Since the wedding isn’t about OP.
I decided, I'm keeping the baby.
I think now you need to get into couples counseling. He has had therapy. Now you need to go with him.
She can fix everything by signing the divorce papers
Frankly, I doubt that you’re ever going to find somebody that lives up to your standards from what you’re posting. And when you are with somebody, you have to compromise on what you can live! with. Nobody’s ever going to be perfect to make it. Somebody is great with dust mites and is horrible to you.
I actually think this could use some counseling for you not for him. He’s probably a regular person. And like you said he’s trying, but your statement of his just not quite good enough, for it doesn’t find every speck of dirt is a little concerning to me, it’s a little OCD.
Sweet home, Alabama
So let me get this straight, you are talking marriage and kids, and he is talking threesomes.
I dont think his and your values are aligned, not a good sign for long term prospects…
Or they broke up, he saw the layoff coming and got back with her to be his unemployment insurance.
I seriously don’t understand this fear of what she would ask you. What do you think she’s going to ask which would make you have to lie again or come clean? “Hey, remember when we first started chatting and you said you couldn’t talk because you were going out with friends? What did you do that night?” I highly doubt it coming up, unless she point blank decides randomly to ask if you were dating or sleeping with anyone else.
They knew though.
I’m planning on moving to that city this summer so we will be in the same place. When we were planning out first date the texting wasn’t that great either but the plans happened and we had a really good time. When planning this date he was quick to make the reservations after we confirmed the date and place. But it’s after where he drops off.