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She needs to see a professional. There are a lot of things here, the new medication, smoking, alcohol and potential paranoia. Reddit can't help especially from a secondhand account.
I second this. Absolutely the best way to see what the vibe is between them.
He said he felt uncomfortable about it because he wasn’t sure if it was inappropriate or no
So, he knew it wasn't okay for him to get her sex toys and he did it anyway. He didn't tell you because he knew what he was doing.
I'd be asking your friend and your husband point blank if they have feelings for each other. If she does not immediately jump to “why the fuck did he think that was an okay gift” I'd bet money they've been having inappropriate conversations about sex.
Kind of seems like he was testing the waters, probably wants a shot at a threesome.
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I have many thoughts about this, but the main ones are this. I am sorry about your background. I think the difficulties you are having learning snowboarding might have exacerbated some past coping mechanisms. But, mainly, snow sports are very, very difficult to get started at as an adult. Your bf has made several mistakes. He tried to teach you, and he threw you into the dynamic of people, who already enjoyed the sport. You belong to a snowboarding school, away from your bf, family, and friends. Learning this will beat you up, and the one involved should be a paid instructor, not the family you are trying to love. I can see how you feel.. inadequate (not true but standing on something slippery on top a hill may certainly feel that way), frustrated, hurting, jealous (of other people’s ease around this), and of course your battered background pops up.
If you are still there, tell your boyfriend to pay for daily lessons and that you will be glad to meet them at aprés-ski for drinks. Towards the end of the trip, only if you feel that you can make it down happily, invite him to show him what you have learned. He better be proud of you.
I’ve learned this as a ski instructor: “families, who ski together, bitch together”. This is not an easy sport to learn, and negative traits surface in no time.
Your boy should have avoided all of this. I hope both of you make it through this trip well.
Sounds like your not ready for a child
The relationship is dead OP, he's told you how he feels and can you honestly say you wouldn't resent the shit out of him regardless of what you do now?
Ultimately, you have to make the choice that you can on-line with, but I caution you to think with a potential mom brain. If you are going to bring a kid into the world who has a parent who resents and doesn't want them, the both of you are in for a rough ride. That doesn't necessarily mean it's not a worth it ride, but even your best effort can't just erase the problems that pop up–you have to plan for it.
Do you ever get bored during a massage session?
I think she should have apologized. At 33yo she knows better she dropped the ball.
Now you know why she's single.
I think a ski trip over a long weekend is a big deal and a real treat (without the propsal).
I'm surprised you didn't tell her to stay home. She basically missed the trip.
Maybe she was legit busy, or a poor planner , or just lives in her own head.
You be the judge. At 33yo I would not cut her any slack.
I understand how you feel. I’m in my early 20s and my parents had me when they were 45/50. My dad is the oldest out of the two and you can definitely tell it’s coming up. Personally I don’t know a way to be ok with it, but honestly spending what time you do have with them will help with life after. I lost my brother a few years back and based on that death I’d say it’ll hurt a lot but it gets easier especially when you keep their spirit alive. Even now on holidays we will put gifts on his grave and just talk about the things going on in our lives.
Do you know if there is any data on the long term success rate of non-monogamous relationships?