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Seeing as few people are advocating for your husband I will.
There are a lot of men in this world who are happy to create life and then take absolutely no responsibility for the children they help create. Your husband is honest enough to say he is not ready for that responsibility. Perhaps in the past he thought he eventually would be but now realises he isn’t. I can understand you being hurt by that, but I think it shows more integrity for him to say this now rather than go along with a parenthood he’s not committed to.
And I’m sorry but despite your claim to love this man, your entire post has been about you resenting him. Now perhaps it’s your frustration about the situation coming through, but it does make me wonder about the basis of your relationship. Call me old fashioned but when two people marry then it should be because they want to spend the rest of their lives together regardless of what else happens. It doesn’t appear as if that’s the way you feel about your husband.
So yes, if your need to have children outweighs your desire to be with this man then you should absolutely leave him. Because I don’t think you are in love with him.
And everybody seems to treat you as if you’re 88 not 38. There’s still time for you to find someone else and conceive the old fashioned way. Whatever you do, don’t use any embryos that have been fertilised by your husband’s sperm, without his permission.
And one final thought. The end result of all this could be that you bring a child into this world. Don’t just think about what you want. Also think about what would be best for the child. All the best.
You know a healthy strong relationship doesn’t have to establish these so called boundaries. These are all common sense. Built into a relationship. Been been married 22 years and never had to have this kind of discussion. If these have to be established something is not working.
No! He's made it clear he doesn't want a second child and she needs to respect that. If she were pregnant he was pushing for an abortion no one would be talking ab out couples therapy. Everyone would be tearing the dude apart and telling him man up and deal with it.