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It is not what you want to hear at all, but how you should handle it is cutting contact.
She cheated. Then she tried to make things work while presumably continuing to see this guy. You cannot trust her. She will lie to get what she wants.
It hurts. I'm so sorry for what you are going through. It feels like a limb being ripped off at first when you have to sever a relationship, but I promise you that dragging this out will hurt you over and over again. She will say what she must to get you back. But those are words. Her actions speak, too, and they say something entirely different.
Cut contact. Block. Don't seek out what she is doing. Grieve for what you had. You will feel like utter shit, but the break will be clean. If you keep contact, you are just going to keep reopening a wound and hurting yourself… I know this from experience. Let yourself feel like shit, and then eventually you can move on. Find something better. Find yourself without her. In time, you will see the weight that has been lifted from your shoulders. I wish you all the best, sincerely. You didn't deserve this, and she doesn't deserve your loyalty.
Maybe… would it help if I got into a local med school? I on-line in Boston so pretty competitive.
It doesn't make it better, but it makes your statement that it was incestuous rape false.
Everyone, EVERYONE, thinks that they will be the best parents ever. Until they aren't. You will fuck up just like anyone else, because no one is perfect. You're not just an eternal optimist, you are straight up naive.
A considerate boyfriend would have driven to yours with dinner already picked up then let you sleep. This guy is a selfish, childish idiot who cares nothing for your safety or well-being. Not much of a loss here if you move on.
Time to voice your desires. Even if it fails this time, it makes for good practice.
Why do you want to be friends with this person?