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Birth Date: 1997-12-19
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Ethnicity: ethnicityWhite
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Eyes color: eyeColorBlue
Subculture: subcultureRomantic
First, I want to say what a lovely person you seem to be. Your focus on the positive is wonderful.
I was raised the same way it sounds like your girlfriend was raised. You'd do anything for people. The problems begin when you don't tell someone who has unreturned feelings 'no.' Then if you tell them no repeatedly and they still won't stop with attention and gifts, truly the kindest thing you can do is tell them to jump off. With certain people, a head nod in their direction will mean they have a chance to be with you. When you really get to the root of it, you're not doing the kindest thing by accepting those. I've had a number of stalkers and people that don't give up over the years because I never wanted to be unkind (not that I think I'm all that, I'm not). But it truly wasn't kind to do anything but discontinue all contact. Their mental health is not your responsibility but allowing that to continue instead of them spending that time moving forward or getting help…not the kindest thing. I have stories for days about this, if you think any might help your beautiful souled girlfriend.
There are two more factors, though. First, it is okay to prioritize yourself. That's not selfish or wrong. It can be very hard to realize that you don't believe that putting yourself first is the right thing to do. And it's confusing when you're trying your best to consider everyone's feelings and you truly don't see what's best. But a friend is not a good friend when they say, “my need, that is making you uncomfortable, and putting myself before your relationship, is more important to me.” He knows her enough to know that he's the one who is causing her to hurt. He's playing on her kindness, and that's not very kind of him.
The other factor is that she might want (trying to avoid the terms 'need' or 'should') to prioritize your relationship. I feel like you think you may be asking too much or are worried you seem jealous or controlling. I don't think you are. From everything you've told us, your gut is yelling at you. Trust your gut. Your girlfriend trusts you and you have an outside perspective that she doesn't.
There is a ton of emotional labor that goes into this kind of decision when you're like me. But it is possible to cut through all of it and just say, “be kind and draw those boundaries. Prioritize your own well-being and that of your relationship.”
I’m gonna be honest with you OP, selling pics is something she should have told you about long before you were engaged and married
However….$1000 to only send pictures? Pictures only?
That is very very very very hot for me to believe
How did you not swing on them? Especially the photographer?