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I’m no expert, but I’m pretty sure herpes in a relationship is manageable. There are ways to practice safe sex and minimize your risk of getting it from your partner. I would suggest you both take a trip to her doctor and let them, the experts, talk you through it. Don’t take medial advice or pointers from people on Reddit; we’re just clueless anonymous goons.
Simple: Stop giving him head. You being angry isn’t a deterrent. Not giving him head for a few months will teach him to respect your boundaries.