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No clue, but boundaries definitely need to be set if you are uncomfortable.
You might not want to consider divorce, but your husband literally wants to sleep with other people. I’d say this is worse than you think and after 17 years, this isn’t a solution but a foot out the door. I’ve been married 17 years too but neither of us would ever consider sleeping with anyone else no matter what. I see your issue but if he is pushing this, he’s frustrated enough to go.
UpdateMe!
You're 33 years old for Christ sake, block her and move on. Maybe change gyms.
If he knows where she is, it isn't necessarily a safe spot. Other people suggested having other people around, a dog and cameras.
The best bet is to be gone for a few weeks and let him gtfo.