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Sounds like you live rent free in her head. What a weird thing to do.
Ok other commenters are going to do well, I hope, with the emotional aspect so I will concentrate on the practical. Are you and your grandmother ok? If so I would celebrate an innocent child, your half sister, with grandma. Reality is that this baby isn’t going anywhere… she’s a part of your life, and fair or not your actions are going to matter in HER life.
So, to recap: he's trashy, embarrassing, irresponsible and abusive.
You should probably explain why you don't want to break up.
The only perspective that matters is of consequences.
What are the consequences of telling, not telling.
If it was not you that had the issue but your best friend, what would you suggest her and why?
Your dad is a POS. HE has been sleeping with a Minor and has NO QUALMS sharing your bf With you!. No Shame and No Guilt AT ALL!.
DONT LET HIM PLAY VICTIM and sell you some sad stories about the not able to be himself (gay) openly or what not.
I suggest to go NC on your DAD for life.
Make it about you. Say that with the new year you are focusing on eating better and reducing take out. Say that when you’re together that you would appreciate her help not to be tempted into take out of she can.
Suggest you have read that planning home meals prior to avoid being tired and ordering out instead.
Ask her if she would have time to help as you are feeling overwhelmed and you value her advice.
Then make comments as she is helping that you appreciate her support and that it’s hot to do alone. That saving money and being healthier is important to you.
Then you can plan things together that promote healthier choices. -Bringing over food to cook. -Going for a romantic stroll holding hand and talking -Going for a sexy swim before bed.
This will build your relationship but at no stage is it about her losing weight.
She will feel connected to you and maybe get back to being motivated to make changes herself.
Do not bring it up. She knows. Not your job to tell her… she needs your lead and connection.
Try to focus on on making friends (probably through hobbies) and let the rest happen on its own. We’re all gonna make it buddy!
Go to the toilet. Just go, lock the door. Have a 20 minute sit (which seems normal with most men) and then come back.