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Well that’s good that everything has worked for your relationship. There is no reason as to why he was never mentioned. When she mentioned him for the first time, all I remember was how enthusiastic she seemed to tell me about him, so I am assuming they were doing great and never really fell out. I don’t even bother to ask about him anymore but I find it odd now that I don’t hear about him even though she told me that he’d be moving here soon.
Instead of waiting for him to propose and let all the pressure on him, YOU be the one to do it instead.
There is always that option, whether you like it or not.
Why do men do this? False promises and essentially leading people on? This goes for both men and women actually. If you do that, fuck you.
Just because they behaved, doesn't mean they changed… Go for your own happiness OP because you DESERVE BETTER.
Not so much a red flag, but a giant red spinnaker used to pull massive sailing ships.
Get out ASAP
I'm sorry to hear about your situation. It sounds like you are really trying to communicate with your partner and make things right, but it's difficult when they won't listen.
The most important thing right now is that you prioritize your own mental health and well-being above all else. Whether or not the tinder account was created by someone else, it still led to an issue in your relationship, so I would suggest taking some time away from the situation while you figure out how best to address this issue with her. If she continues not seeing eye-to-eye with you on this matter, then please consider seeking outside help such as a trained therapist. They can provide advice and guidance for both of through these challenging times. Take care!
There is nothing you can do here except try to nudge him to get home safely and not drive home under the influence. You will find out what happened and how bad it was when he talks to you next time.
Yes he did. In the past he’s told me to just wake him up no matter what because he needs to get home to get to work tomorrow. I assumed that this was what he wanted tonight, when it wasn’t. He had a long day and I don’t think he’s a bad person, he just had a bad day.
Good. Any time you feel unsure or need a reminder, feel free to come back here and we'll be happy to give you another kick to stick to your decision to leave him.
Poor man baby, leeching off OPs parents and only having his own little games room for privacy.
I'd consider this cheating tbh. what intentions would he have other than to get off to other women?
Go out on your own with your friends for NYE, have the time of your life and find yourself another bf. The one you currently have is a douche.
Reading this makes me wonder if you're suffering from depression. I am not an expert but it may be a good idea to hit up a therapist. Also for your relationship, your husband shouldn't be your only source of happiness, that's way to much pressure on him, you're a team and it's good to help each other but your post makes it sound one sided: you bring no income, you bring no joy, no hobbies, no friends, no plans.
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So don't be subtle. Just flat out tell him that you know he finds this “bokoblin mode” thing hilarious but you don't and it's actually really irritating you. If his heart gets broken over that, he is spectacularly fragile.
Is it hard for you to believe that he might just be a bad person and this has nothing to do with you?
Fwb with fireman, he said they’re all cheaters and you’re supposed to look the other way.
You should post this on r/stepparent should as well if you want an opinion that includes more people who are actually living within such a family dynamic. That being said, while cutting contact isn’t likely realistic (nor is it smart to ruin a good coparenting relationship), I think this request your wife is making is likely coming from a place of insecurity that you probably helped create. Given the age difference, I’m assuming she was very accommodating when you two first met and that’s part of what you found attractive. But in doing so you likely created norms that she wasn’t thrilled with but felt she had to accommodate in order to keep you, but she’s now realizing how uncomfortable this friendly dynamic makes her. And given that you chose to be with someone who didn’t come with the similar “my kids are my priority, and my ex is in my life forever bc of it” scenario, it’s unlikely that you would have wanted to make similar compromises that she did.
You two need counseling with someone who has experience with blended family dynamics. She has resentment and frustration at the core of this and you two need to dig it up and work through it. Also, this is not the best sub for relationship advice for anyone over 30, so you may want to expand those horizons a bit in the future.
Hope you two find some peace and warmth with this issue…
Thank you I'll read it 🙂
It is, there are countless of scientific studies about this topic. It can cause sexual dysfunction due to the “death grip” among other things. Which can make the dick desensitized and mess with actual sex. But it has also proven to be very detrimental to their mental health most of all and they often do not recognize it's a problem. And obviously, it also tends to have bad effects on relationships/marriages.
A lot of the facts are missing here. The post clearly shows his wife dislikes him watching porn and would want him to not watch it at all. That strongly indicates she hasn't liked it the 5 years prior to this incident. People proposing ultimatums don't come out of the blue. I think we are missing a big part of how the wife has been feeling, what she has expressed, etc… in the past 5 years. This argument OP describes seems rather extreme and such arguments have always been a result of weeks/months/years of underlying issues that have slowly been growing.
Yes every child should have one at birth for both parents.
I get so much crap for this line of thinking.
You do? R u for real?
Everyone who's read this thinks you should block his number until you can stop wanting to get hurt by him.
Wake up, bang, stop for lunch, bang, after Netflix, bang… lol
Sounds like you did the right thing tbh – well done!
he's cheating, your relationship is over. be the one to make that clear. you're worth more than this
OK so now you have evidence of two different places where she really needs to say she has a boyfriend and she’s not. You have a problem. She’s not letting people know she has a boyfriend so she’s kind of acting single only not to the extreme or she would cause damage with you. You need to set some boundaries whatever you’re comfortable with, I would start to feel bad
Sounds like your family had it coming. Ypur brother sounds decent, and you're absolutely right to cut the rest out of your life. Harsh as it sounds, but your sister also is just earning her Karma, even though domestic violence is of course no joke and I hope for her that she realizes her fatal mistake someday.
It’s not a game just a birthday message
And you're not going to with a bat shit dynamic like that.
Because of what today is I’m calling bullshit on every posts I see today starting with this one
Wait for her on the hotel room.
Wait for her on the hotel room.
IMO, this is about control.
He's using this to see how you respond when he pushes you. If you give in, or at least promise to get it fixed, he'll conclude that he can have his way in future conflicts. And this won't be the last ridiculous request.
If you fight him and show you have a spine, he may call it off because he wants a partner he can control. Or, he may give in because he's afraid of being alone.
Either way, it's absolutely ridiculous to put a condition like this on marriage. But I think you already know that.
You sound like an awesome boss.
Why are you with someone you can't talk to? If you can't talk about your expectations and feel safe you're not with the right person.