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It’s funny reading this because this is literally how I feel with my best friend ? we are both 24 female but we are polar opposites as far as how we act in public. I’m the type to sit and talk and relax at a bar and she’s the type to get on the table and shake her ass and talk to everybody. If I’m honest I have found myself not going out with her as much because of it. It’s unfortunate but for people that are not extroverted it’s such a turn off and emotionally and physically draining to have to sit there stewing in the uncomfortableness and I don’t think that extroverts realize that lol. My mom is the same way. In fact I went out to a bar with my mom and my boyfriend a couple months ago and she ended up talking to the bartender and at one point he literally turned to me and he was like is your mom embarrassing you?? I realized I literally had my head down and I was staring at the ground and I was visibly embarrassed as shit. I really try to just think of it like one day that person is going to die and who am I to tell them how to live! their life but I know that that’s a really morbid and drastic way to think about it lol ? i’m not sure what the point of my comment was other than to assure you that there are other people that deal with the same thing but as far as how to drop that feeling let me know if you find out because I’m way too familiar with it✌???
This is some Grade A nonsense. You seem like a mature, genuine, and decent person; you deserve someone similar. Your girlfriend is not this person.
I consider it an excellent personality trait to always try to see the best in people. But not when it’s blinding you to shitty ways you’re being treated.
There is overthinking and then there is obsession and the inability to be reasonable. To me she sounds insecure and extremely immature. When you are in a healthy relationship it's a give and take. Nothing can be rainbows and sunshine 100% of the time. One of you is bound to have a bad day and you should be able to rely on your partner for support and more importantly understanding. She is not giving you either and instead giving you more stress. But you need to understand that her behavior is entirely on her. The way she is acting and feeling now has nothing to do with you. It is completely unreasonable for her to expect you to support her insecurity when you are the one needing the support. Please take this as the warning sign it is. She is young and may (again MAY) grow out of it in time. But this kind of thing has a way of snowballing, especially if it's tolerated in the first place. The best thing you can do is lay it on the line for her. Tell her that you are the one who needs the extra love and support from her right now, and you are disappointed that she is putting her feeling above yours and refusing to show you and support or even basic empathy for what you're going through. That if you can't rely on her when you need her the most, then when can you? If she honestly cannot see your point of view, then she is not ready for a mature relationship and I would definitely consider breaking it off. Maybe coming back to it if she can show some self growth.
Can confirm. I work in healthcare and the men seldom stay. Some do stay though. And some women leave
It sounds like this guy is telling the truth. So, OP do with that info what you will
Maybe see if you can get into some couples' counseling. This may not convince him to function as a hands-on parent but at least you'll get a better idea of what to expect. You may have to consider a later term termination, adoption or single parenthood if he doesn't come around. It's pretty normal to be terrified when contemplating first time parenthood. Some people can focus and get their heads in the game, others never do. Good luck
That last line fucking has me dead xD Love it.
Dude. You created an entire subreddit about your issues with your sister. Half you post history is about your sister. You're obsessed with your sister. You're a grown man and your sister randomly sleeping with some dude years ago is ruining your life?
Get help and move on. Thus is ridiculous.
I think being financially responsible for a partner of under a year when you are that young would be very hot for anybody. Can your family not help a bit until you heal? If not, I understand he said he would but you really haven’t been together long and you honestly aren’t his financial responsibility.
That also doesn’t mean he should neglect/mistreat you. This relationship just may not be good to last for either of you.
Break up because he will undoubtedly be the guy that divorces his wife as soon as the doctor says the C word
You need to leave her immediately, and take your child.
This is terrible advice. He needs to talk to a lawyer immediately, or if the threat is imminent, call the police.
Do not leave the marital home, and for god's sake do NOT kidnap your own child. This WILL be used against you in subsequent custody matters.
Instead, talk to a lawyer right now, do everything they tell you to do.
And call the authorities the next time this happens and work to get the abuser removed from the home.
Thank you!!! I was thinking the same thing!!
This!!!
ehh..in this sub most of the trolls have either throw aways or year old accounts with no history..this one might be real but being about 75% of the post in here are trolling/spamming/catfishing the odds really aren't in the favor of being legit, no matter how the account looks.
Why would it be too awkward?
Is it because you don’t want to tell people that you had an emotional affair with your husbands boss? Just lie and say you met him at the grocery store. You can’t possibly be worried about the ethics of it at this point.
Are you sure you're 25 and not 15?
Yes it’s a red flag. She can’t communicate and secretly spending time with him behind your back. Get out of the relationship.
I'm more likely to google “divorce” during the week before my period- not every month, but there are definitely months where stress is getting to me. I'm trying to get pregnant, so birth control / medication is not an option for me at the moment.
Knowing that it's hormones helps- I'm trying to get pregnant so I have an app that's tracking my cycle, I know when I'm more predisposed to thoughts of “running away to join the circus”. There's a technique called “self soothing” you should practice, it's good in all areas for managing emotions with anxiety. Same thing with “rewriting the script” to give your feelings a happier feel. There's also the “Emotional Scale” where if you're at “14. Worry” it's impossible to get to “1. Joy/Empowerment/Super Happy”- but you can focus on things to bring yourself up to maybe a “6. Hopefulness.”
You make decisions, don't let your hormones do it for you. Give yourself space and time to react to any conflict, if you think you don't like something just take a few days to yourself to marinate on it before you act.
Ya I get that, and I don’t think this is automatic breakup territory, even though I think he needs to decide whether he can get over it or not, then decide about the future. If he’s just going to build resentment towards her, it’s best to leave now.
But there are also people here telling him the reason he’s upset that she lied to him is because of his insecurity and controlling tendencies, which is just lunacy.