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I've learned to be extremely wary of any peer who feels the need to “teach me a lesson.”
They could have armed wrestled to prove his point. He could have even made it fun. They didn't have to do anything to make her cry.
I feel exhausted & crowded reading this & your replies, & I don’t even know you. First off, you have no rights to this child. She isn’t a toy that her parents have to share. She’s a human being & at her age, her parents have complete control over who is in her life. Second, the way you blame your DIL for this & never even mention your son is beyond annoying. Is your son the baby’s father? Then he has equal say on who has access to his daughter, & it doesn’t sound like he’s advocating at all for you. You might ask yourself why your child, who knows you better than your DIL, is not on your side. Since this is an advice sub, my advice to you is to back way off. Visit your son & his family when you are invited. Ask them if there is anything you can do to help, & if they don’t want your help, take no for an answer. This will be naked, but maybe if you demonstrate that you respect your son & DIL’s authority as parents, they might let you in. You have to re-set the relationship & start over as a more laid back respectful grandparent who respects their limits.
Emotional cheating is also cheating.
A guy that doesn’t wanna spend time with you isn’t really into you.
How can we tell from that? You don't give any examples of the behavior. The term narcissist is thrown around so easily, and neither of you probably is one. It doesn't sound like you get along, though.
It's difficult to know exactly why someone would behave this way, as everyone's motivations and feelings are unique. However, it sounds like this person may have been looking for a physical relationship without necessarily wanting an emotional connection. They may have enjoyed the attention and physical intimacy with you, but then lost interest once they realized that it wasn't going to be a long-term thing.
It's also possible that this person was genuinely interested in a romantic relationship with you, but then changed their mind for whatever reason. Perhaps they met someone else they were more interested in, or they simply realized that they didn't want to be in a relationship with you after all.
Regardless of the reason, it's important to remember that you deserve to be treated with respect and kindness. It sounds like this person has been stringing you along and not giving you clear answers, which is not fair to you. You might want to consider taking some space from this person to heal and move on from the situation.
Hey OP, a few things. First in general good job doing you! My wife and I both grew a lot in our early 20s, but we’ve grown together (early 30s now) growing apart is also totally possible.
The reason I’m replying to this in particular is your “memory” issues don’t sound like memory issues, they sound like underdeveloped executive functioning. Please see a mental health professional, in addition to the general benefits of therapy (my wife and I do individual therapy, couples therapy might help you and your husbands relationship) talking to one might help you with strategies or even medication to help with those issues. I’ve spent a long time developing a hodgepodge system (phone reminders being some of mine too) to get me through those.
It's simply not nice to the guys to deliberately waste their time and attention. You're not in the wrong. It has nothing to do with trust, it's just rude.
You know what? Good for you!! Drunk driving is irresponsible as fuck. Both my husband and I are guilty of doing it back in our 20s. I decided to quit drinking six years ago and I never looked back. It was a surprise every time I drank… Who were they gonna get? I could turn into a complete CUNT. A terrible person.
I didn't drink and drive a lot, just a few times. My friends would drive us back drunk. Then I moved to Texas and met my now husband, he'd drive us back home after drinking. But we've both pretty much quit drinking because alcohol sucks. It hurts the person using and those around them.
Why do you have doubts in your relationship?
Sounds like he want to talk about committing more to the relationship. Stop overthinking this and just wait till you can talk to him.
Well his age should also mess with you
I think his not putting in any effort and you telling him about it with no change speaks volumes to where he's at.
You can keep pouring into it with no satisfaction if you want to “make it work” or find someone else.
I am so sorry this happened to you.
I never told my mum when it happened to me, I didn't tell anyone untill two years later when I started seeing my current partner.
I don't suggest going down the route I went, you can only push it down for so long.
I suggest sitting down with your mother, maybe write it down. As it will not be easy to say the words, it will hurt but there is a sense of relief you get that someone else knows.
Who knows
If you really believed there was nothing wrong, you wouldn't need to keep her age out of the discussion.
Just cut him loose. There’s plenty men in the world who won’t be like this.
Who? Me? ?
You were raped. Pack up and leave, go to someone you trust and I suggest reporting him to the police
Separate therapy. We have tried couples therapy but that wasn't successful