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Languages: en
Birth Date: 1999-12-05
Body Type: bodyTypeAverage
Ethnicity: ethnicityIndian
Hair color: hairColorBlonde
Eyes color: eyeColorBlack
Subculture: subcultureGlamour
As a general rule, in mutually monogamous relationships you should not discuss things like sex, money, or your relationship with your current significant other with any person who is sexually attracted to your sex/gender. There are obvious exceptions to this like family members and what not but there's absolutely no reason to discuss any of those things with a straight guy if you are a straight woman. That's how “it just happened, I don't know how it got here” mistakes happen!
If you truly want to regain your boyfriend's trust go ask him that question. He's the only one who can decide what, if anything, is appropriate to him to resolve the issue.
And for the love of everything see a therapist. You aren't coping well with anything here. They'll help you navigate communicating and coping better.
Just because a relationship ends doesn't mean it has failed.
It's not your duty to love someone forever. You don't need to have kids together because that made sense at one point.
2 years ago the person I thought was the love of my life and I drifted apart after 10 amazing years together. It was the best thing that could have happened for both of us. I've felt love on whole new incredible ways with new people. And I've become the version of myself I always wanted to be.We are both living our best lives and it's wonderful to hear the things she's done for herself. We're proud of each other and happier apart.
The amazing thing about moving on is that you don't lose the good times you had. You can cherish those memories and remember the best moments of your love for what it was. You'll still have memories of that trip you took together, you'll still know how to cook that meal he taught you how to make. You're the person you are in part because of each other, and thats beautiful. If you choose to separate youget to keep the good things that became a part of you during this relationship and leave the bad things behind.
Sometimes the spark goes away and you just need to find it again. I've done that once or twice. But sometimes it's time to move on and that's just the beginning. And based on your post history it sounds like it may be time to move on.
So sad that more people don’t understand this. Society needs to learn to respect children more. Keep spreading the positive message, OP
Yea like in the fight we had over text like i brought up all the times she was rude or careless with her words and how I bit my tongue and how she broke up with me so easily just irritated me and got me frustrated. She now is aaying she doesn't know how to go forward from this but im like well same here but im willing to put the past behind us
So sorry to hear this. People are so full of shit.
If it makes you feel better, I wasn't popular or cool in high school and there were always girls like this. Funny enough, a few years later, none of these mean girls went to college. They're still drinking in parking lots and taking selfies while the rest of us have good jobs, are traveling, and living our lives.
The same bitchy girls that used to laugh at me and my friends now try to suck up to me because I got “hot”, gained a lot of followers on instagram, and have a good job.
Karma is a bitch. Stay strong.
Only wish I'd stood up for myself more before. But your life will be good. I promise 🙂
“I'm sorry your mom is sick. Hope she is better soon” Please do not contact me again.
BLOCK HIM!
People should wear what they want
I’m sorry about your current situation. Depression kills and it is naked to navigate life on a daily basis with it. However, I will say sometimes it’s not even just smell. Showering is generally just a good thing to do if you want to be sexually intimate with someone. Not sure how this department of your relationship is affected, but I personally wouldn’t feel the greatest about having intercourse with unwashed genitals. Just something to think about.
They’re very dependent and don’t leave a relationship until they have their next mom—er, partner—lined up
Once one thing leads you down this particular path of thought a lot of actually benign, innocent things might start looking like signs too. But if you feel in your gut that she's cheating hire a private investigator to gather concrete evidence before you end up getting slapped with an unfavourable divorce.
bro… i do read Reddit stories and tik toks about it, maybe i need to get off social media, it might be too late for me tbh ?
You were/are right to put your daughter’s well-being first. If she sliced open your daughter’s arm, cheated on you and just generally behaved in a horrible way, I can find no redeeming qualities in her. Her behavior may have escalated into something far worse.
Christ Stop letting him use your car Or just stop seeing him
Look who's talking…
She’s young & wants to experience things. Y’all are at different stages in life. Maybe she isn’t the one for you.
In this situation, you keep your door open and your mouth shut.
You can’t stop him from distancing himself. But you can make sure that he knows you will always welcome him if he ever decides to change that. You do this with the way you treat him – if you’re judgemental towards him at all, it doesn’t matter if you say he’s always welcome – your actions will drown out any words of welcome you might say.
Your parents may want to rethink some of their plans – the gift giving, the planned inheritance of the business, etc. Your place is to privately express concern to your parents that they may be investing too deeply in a one way relationship. You can raise the topic to your parents once, then forget it unless they bring it up again.
This guy is a dweeb. Definitely not good at being a partner
I am horrified reading this. LEAVE THIS MAN! This is not normal behavior. This is straight up bullying/abuse and then he’s gaslighting you and making you blame yourself! Please, please, please leave this man. This is only going to get worse.
You need to grow up. He’s not “still talking to a girl he slept with” he’s talking to the woman he is going to share a child with for life. I don’t think you are ready to continue this relationship. If it was me I would break up officially .
I understand. I've had that happen before and at first it hurt my feelings but then I was like fk that. I was a great friend. Anytime she needed me I found a way to be there for her. So in turn i became thankful that I didn't waste anymore of my love on someone who didn't appreciate it. Your ex friend has some things to work out within herself and until she handled that, she wasn't going to be a good friend to you anyway. Because if there was an actual problem she could've easily just said so and I'm sure she's aware of that.
It's not even about the ring, it's that he blatantly went and did exactly what she expressed she did not want and expected her to just roll over and let it happen. Starting off an engagement already disrespecting your partner's opinions and wishes is not a healthy road to marriage.
Trying to fix his problems for him is codependent thinking. If he is struggling, your job as a partner is to be there for him without fixing him or his issues. Your wishing only best for his mental health is the most optimal position you could take. Just keep providing him space and support and if it's not enough, keep in mind that it's not all about what you do or do not do, he has a lot of circumstances of his own.
Your body is perfectly normal, I promise. But you should not be with someone who jokes about mutilating your body. Some things can never be jokes, and this is one.
Thanks for the link I will give it a read. I always like men with long hair and as a child and teenager, I loved long hair men. I was convinced I would date someone with long hair and then my ex came along. I had another teenage crush on a man that it was more his personality that made me feel that way, maybe I just need to see if things develop.
My ex wasn’t attractive to everyone , that’s what makes it hurt as he was special to me
I’ll have to stay behind to help her afford it
You are funding a life you aren't even going to be part of?
She's using you. There's nothing else about it. Tell her she pulls her weight and builds a savings or you are out.
You are taking a deadly gamble either way if you choose a partner that will put you in danger. Even if there were no signs of them exhibiting that type if behavior before. With cops you know the risks off rip. Cops kill people that don't have weapons all the time. Calling them is a deadly gamble that is out of your control once they are called. You can't walk away to leave or to cool down if you're angry after that point. And idk what situations that you've been in that would make talking to the cops while pissed off and angry regardless of the circumstances a good idea. Like for example, if you're pissed that your partner was texting another person or whatever, but you're expressing yourself, the cops is going to have their hand on their gun. Ready to shoot. That's not a safer situation, you invited more potential conflict. That's why I would hold calling 911 as a last resort.
I'm am also guy, so I think I'm a little bias when it comes to feeling like I can always walk away without the fear of being harmed, bur if a cops shows up, regardless of what for. That is a direct threat to my personal safety if I'm involved, even without having an actual crime being committed.
I still feel like it was a performance one way or another. Intention doesn't equal impact
Stop getting hung up on whether or not he's got a new partner. Not indicative. People are perfectly capable of deciding that they
Sounds to me like he's had some time outside the marriage to consider how he feels about it and has decided that he doesn't really feel anything at all. So he's obviously quite amused at your attempts to follow a game plan after it's not only failed but the game itself has ended and everyone's gone home.
Which is – let me be clear here – a complete dick move on his part. If he's come to a decision that he doesn't want to repair the relationship, the correct move is to tell you. Wind things up, get a divorce, move on.
Couple things you left out though. Like what precipitated this separation? His actions, your actions? Bit of both?
Whose idea was the separation? I could be wrong, but it feels like it was your idea?
Keep your new body you worked so naked for, toss the boyfriend. Think about how you want to be treated in a relationship and then compare that list to how you are treated. Make your conclusions.
He told you he gets to sleep around but you don’t and you stayed? Honey no! Just block him on everything and never ever ever speak to him again. Also try to do some work on your self esteem because you deserve better.
No offence but you really creep me out.
Glad i did.
Out of curiosity: Why did you marry Charlie? There must have been reasons you wanted to be with him in the first place, beyond cuddles. Has only become forgetful about big events recently or has that always been a thing?
I write romance books and those guys in the books are designed to be as many women’s perfect man as possible. It’s pretty easy to do when the guy you are writing isn’t real, doesn’t have any real hang-ups, any real bad days, etc. It is also easy, when you are writing about the beginning of a relationship when everything is awesome and exciting.
You really need to pin down what is you essentially watching a James Bond film and deciding you need more excitement in your life and what are genuine long-term problems. Your husband’s lack of communication for example sounds like a real problem. Not dancing in the rain does not.
Maybe if he really is “avoidant” then he's only with you because it's easier than breaking up? He's spent the last eight months trying to break up with you and your response is not to accept that but pressure him to stay.
What do you want to happen here? I can't tell without a lot more detail if he's completely non-commital, if you're a little too controlling, or somewhere in the middle of by those two, but the short of it all is that it's eight months in and he keeps trying to break up. What future do you think there is in repeatedly talking him out of it? He needs to want to be with you, not simply not be strong enough to walk away.
Thanks, she's been going through allot recently so last thing I wanna put pressure on her but really dont wanna be one of thoes couples that split just over lack of sex, especially after all weve gone through.
In 30 years of marriage I have never been criticized by my husband on my looks, my body, or my appearance.
Not when I was pregnant, post partum, not even when he was in the shower shaving me after a c- section. Not ever.
How would I react? I would throw the whole man out.
Yeah to all the young people out there – your partner shouldn't be the most hurtful person you know. They should actually be nicer to you than a random stranger.
In any case OP, leave. You probably look amazing and he is afraid of losing you so hes shitting on your self esteem.
Please tell the wife.
NGL, the sexual side of your relationship does sound like its coming off as a job. There is a heavy focus on.
I think you need to explore these thoughts more:
We would have sex once or twice a week, I felt wanted again. I could live with the frequency with the variety and passion that was back in our love life.
You had passion back in your love on-line because it was about quality instead of quantity. And when there is a constant push for more and more and more… eventually that pushes the other person away and it turns into a reluctance instead of enjoyment.
The reconciliation is not working and will not work. I'm sorry to be blunt, but you aren't a high priority item for your husband. What he wants is his priority.
Because, as a 25 year old, you couldn't possibly make your own decision!
Both of you need to work out how to have a disagreement without swearing at each other or swerving off into irrelevance ('maybe I need a better husband'). For instance, with the horse argument all you really need to say is it doesn't fit into your financial plan, as you want to concentrate on the house. She can come up with all sorts of arguments, but you just repeat the house is your financial priority. You'll only have to do this a few times before the discussion runs out of steam.
Do you have any long term problem with her attitude towards earning and spending money? At the moment you are the provider and earner and seem to have the veto over spending proposals. Marriage or long term partnerships require planning and mutual agreement to be successful. Sitting down and going through the figures regularly is a great way to bring her onboard.
In terms of respect, I agree that you don't have to put up with disrespectful behaviour from her; just make sure it goes both ways. Swearing during an argument should be out.
You’re 21, an adult who’s allowed to have a boyfriend. “I have a boyfriend who I’d really like for you to meet.”
“She didn't tell me she's trans, she literally took my hand in her hand and put my hand down her pants until I touched her penis with zero context or warning.”
Idk..I think it's kinda weird to keep wearing stuff from your ex. Unless your still friends
Some of us really do though, for some of us only penetration feels good and gets us off and oral/fingers do nothing at all.
Do what you want, but there’s a reason she’s trying to date you and not someone in her age group and that reason is worrisome.
You're overthinking things.
If you've already agreed to watch a movie together, there isn't a need to ask him the same question again a week later. Just tell him that next time you're together, you'll plan a special evening so you two can watch the movie together. In other words, make it a statement rather than looking for reaffirmation.
But, when a guy says that he doesn't care either way, it means just that. He's good with whatever, and does not have strong feelings either way. It does *not* mean that he does not care.
Post a picture of you and her. As I said, SHE WANTS YOU TO SHOW HER OFF AS YOURS. And seriously, idgaf if she’s ever sent a selfie her her gd life what does that have to do with her AND you?? You can’t be this blind to what I actually said.
Hell no!! Girl!! Get out!! Thank God you don't live together. If he's like this now, imagine a few more years. He sounds like a very hot mess of red flags.
You're not his wife, why is he expecting traditional wife duties from you when he has not made you his wife.
y'all really be out here taking this 'partner' mess seriously without any legal protections whatsoever. Treat no man like your husband while you are still a girlfriend. “Partner” don't mean sh!t
AND THEN even if married, he knows he can't come at you expecting traditional woman of you unless he's willing to be traditional man. In which case he needs to get a JOB. Any job right now will do. If he cannot work to support himself now due to his mental health then he might need to move back in with his parents if that's an option. He needs to get it together, but it's not on you to take boyfriend on in all his mess. As a girlfriend, this is outside your scope of responsibility.
He an addict, he needs professional help to detox from the porn. It’s pretty bad if he got tennis elbow from jerking off.
I no longer want to be a “good work colleague” after what’s happened. She can find someone else to entertain her.
I just want to get out of it without her freaking out on me and accusing me of being a jerk (which she is starting to do today). She has no right to be upset.
Bye then!
I agree to a point about who invites the other. But this one time, she doesn't have it. They live together and she pays for things for him. She's not charging him or refusing to pay for stuff. She hasn't distilled every experience together to a money transaction. If you can't make ONE exception…dude…you don't need a partner, you need therapy. Relationships are a give and take. If your partner tells you that since you can't pay gas you can't go…how petty are you? Life's joys can't be boiled down to whether, in 50 years of their relationship, she can't pay for gas one time. I feel like you're being willfully obtuse. Do you have a partner?