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Languages: en
Birth Date: 1995-10-11
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Ethnicity: ethnicityIndian
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Eyes color: eyeColorBlack
Subculture: subcultureHousewives
This is why I think before becoming a SAHP it is always necessary to work out a financial contract that includes an allowance for the SAHP that will cover their loss of income, and compensate them for the labor they are providing. During the marriage, not after it in case of a divorce. Either everything goes in the same communal pool and both people have equal access to it, or the SAHP gets a reasonable allowance for their own needs and wants. Not just for the kids.
By the way OP you are being an absolute demon and either you retract everything, negotiate an allowance system for him and compensate him with backpay, or you back the fuck off and step in to parent your own children while he goes and gets his degree and becomes independent. If you don't rectify yourself he's gonna leave you once he's financially able to. I'm guessing that's why you're scrambling, bc you'll lose your free childcare unit who doesn't ask for money for himself even though he has every right to.
Whether you realize it or not, you've created a system where he's completely financially dependent on you and I truly applaud him for realizing it and taking action ASAP.
I would do yourself a favour and cut your losses. It seems he has already moved on. Because his “headspace” was in the room.
Finally…I feel seen! Just not by dates, unfortunately.
This is the real answer.
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I (30f) have been dating my bf (37m) for a little under a year. Currently I am in the process of moving as my landlord gave me notice to leave my bachelor apartment, stating that his son wants to move in. My boyfriend has also been in the process of apartment hunting (we agreed it was a little sudden to go into moving together and would rather it be gradual), however I found a place which I signed for yesterday. My boyfriend says now that he doesn't want to date anymore until he finds his own place also because it makes him feel inadequate (he lives with his brother, sister in law and nieces in their home). I feel like it's bs because I feel like he could find one if he took some initiative. My landlord also divulged my boyfriend's yelling and stuff were factors in why he evicted me because I had been fine for years beforehand. I'm not sure how to feel about this or go about this situation, should I just say screw it and give up on him?