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It is the stripped down version. It’s aunts uncles and cousins we see monthly. Both our families get together once a month and are super close.
I want to make that permanent, but I'm not sure if I'm actually in love with him or the idea of what he represents, a family unit mom, dad, and kids.
If you're going to travel down this road, you have to do so organically. You wouldn't picture marriage on a first date (at least not seriously). You have known him as a supportive friend for a long time, but you don't really know him as the romantic, life partner — that's what dating is for.
He may or may not want to step into a formal stepdad role, you won't know until you ask him out. I think this could be great for you if he's interested, but you have to treat it like you would any other dating situation (with a few variances given the history and that he's already a part of your kids' lives).
If you two get serious, its only fair to him that things are taken in their proper order so feelings don't get confused or rushed.
You are absolutely entitled to say no anytime and every time you feel uncomfortable (or for any reason really).
But this isn't really about you postponing for a week, it's about 6 months of no sex despite what sounds like numerous attempts, cancellations and postponements. I'm sure you can appreciate that this would be damaging for most peoples self esteem.
There's definitely a middle ground to be found if that's what you both want.
This 9/10 rejecting ratio you provided is destroying this guys self esteem. If you're rejecting your partners sexual advances 9/10 times I suggest you review why you're doing that. This won't be a relationship that lasts much longer otherwise.