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Languages: en
Birth Date: 1998-10-25
Body Type: bodyTypeAverage
Ethnicity: ethnicityAsian
Hair color: hairColorBlack
Eyes color: eyeColorBlack
Subculture: subcultureRomantic
I think people mistake regard, inertia, comfort and obligation for “love”.
The OP's wife probably likes him, doesn't want him hurt, and felt obligated to continue with the wedding in the hope that the feelings would arrive. But she doesn't love him and she realised that well before the wedding.
For this being your first girlfriend, good job on the boundary. There is a fine line between being controlling and having a boundary like yours. Now is the tough part is realizing she's probably not worth it, bro.
You're right. You can't and shouldn't stop her. However, that doesn't mean you need to stay in a relationship with her. Honestly. That's probably the only advice you're going to get. It sounds like her ex is going to be in the picture whether you like it or not. The only advice you're going to get is don't do this to yourself.
So. How do you go about telling her without it sounding controlling? You literally just reinforce your boundary.
“Hey, we previously discussed a boundary and made a deal about you being no contact with your supposed toxic ex. The fact that you're now going behind your back and talking to an ex who you've said you've left someone else before to be with him again is simply a deal breaker. I realized I can't control your actions but I can control mine. If you keep in contact with this ex and keep going back to him it's a sign it's not going to work out between us long term”
Sorry bro but youre under reacting.
You reposted it so I reposted my comment.