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  1. So a few questions for context. Is your gf straight or bi? If she’s straight, is this coworker male? And if so, has she said that it’s that coworker she would be interested in sleeping with if you’re ok with it? Same question if she is bi and her coworker is female.

    When someone suggests an open relationship they’ve already got someone in mind. Quite often they’ll introduce the person they have in mind as the person that they talked about the open relationship with. That’s why I ask the question. Sometimes they’ve already slept with that person and are seeking retrospective permission.

    Not saying that’s definitely what’s happening, but something to keep in mind.

    You could ask your gf exactly what it is that she thinks would be fun about the open relationship, and what it is she would be getting from other people that she’s not getting from you. Hopefully framing the question that way will make her think about the whole open relationship thing and then realise that’s not what she really wants. That’s the best case scenario.

    The worst case scenario is that she’ll confirm that she wants to explore sleeping with other people for whatever reason. Of course to a monogamous person like you that will confirm that you’re not enough for her and your relationship is done.

    FWIW if it were me and my SO asked for an open relationship I would end things with her. Even if she subsequently backtracked I wouldn’t be able to trust that she wouldn’t pursue other people in the future, this time without telling me. But that’s me. You know your gf best and maybe you’d be able to trust her more if she told you she was no longer interested in an open relationship.

    Good luck OP, hope you can resolve things one way or the other. It’s sad. I don’t know why people can’t just be happy with the relationship they have and have to cause unnecessary angst instead.

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