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I didn’t like the server because they were being disrespectful towards me and I told him to get another he said no so I felt my feeling weren’t validated even though when he gets bad service he can act and do what he wants. After he said no I gave him the cold shoulder until it hurt his feelings enough we abruptly left and he was like I disrespected him and embarrassed him in front of his friends because they could tell something was off. Yet he has embarrassed me multiple times by acting out and I didn’t even act out.
that she is so immature that she is in denial about so many things that are wrong with her, including the low self-esteem, the lack of intelligence (she is super dumb), laziness, and just overall ungrateful attitude that I do not think she will ever admit anything wrong with herself, to herself.
…. I'm getting the sneaking suspicion this girl isn't the problem here.
and maybe you are actually pretty shit yourself.
I’ve thought about this very thing a hundred times. Perhaps this is why he doesn’t have any. Thank you for your feedback.
ok and why would i throw away a 3 year long relationship that we've built over a girl that probably doesn't even like me?? idk whether you're trying to prove a point or not but if you are, it's a very bad attempt
You’re dead wrong for sleeping with a man you knew had a girlfriend. But yes tell her.
He should do the guy she’s seeing a favor and tell him what she did. Fuck that selfish lying cunt.
Break up with him. He doesn't get to tell you no in regard to this. Block him and a restraining order if it comes down to it.
Are you a sex therapist? It is a real question.
You can’t deny or accuse someone that might or might not have some medical issue if you are not with them and run proper tests.
What if they do not found passion again and she does not wants to go to a GP and they just get a divorce while she may have a physical problem?
Psychological help is important, of course, but making sure her body is okay goes first, is for her health too. And you cannot say that a nurse, a person that studied years to understand the human body, as well as doctors, can’t say what might be wrong with her because they are trained to know and listen to everybody to give context to the situation and asses them.
This is cringe
Yeh that’s my worry is that it can go either way no matter when I tell him. But everyone here has said to do it after the date so I shall. Thank you so much
Would that be the right decision? I'm devastated between contracting her and thinking what if i assumed wrongly about the marriage. It sounds stupid of me to deny it all though
I love happy endings
You can text for your peace of mind but be prepared for anything.
Guilt and our lease, I guess. Our intimacy issue has been a thing for a while, but I think at some point we fell into codependency. I've been digging my way out of it in therapy and with naked work at looking at how I behave everyday. I think partner expects instant progress, which I just can't provide.
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I would give him some space, friendship requires both parties to want it.
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Seriously? They invaded the capital to stop the peaceful transfer of power. The only time in American history that transfer of power was violently disrupted was by the republican party.
I don't believe he's an alcoholic because he drinks maybe twice a week and doesn't get wasted every time but lately it's been a reoccurring thing that if he does happen to drink too much he gets angry and its not fun for anyone.
Say something. It affected you and your feelings are valid. Also his brother sounds like a sleaze. Open and honest communication is the most important thing in a relationship, dont sweep it under the rug. Not a small thing.
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While this is most probably the correct answer it’s kind of funny because these kind of reasonable comments are not found in reversed roles. Imagine the husband says he would give her sex before cooking a meal on her birthday while she really doesn’t want it.
Then being cold and hurt about her not wanting it.
The shit show in these comments. People really have to reflect sometimes.
He probably fucked someone else and now wants you back for whatever reason.
Just don't be stupid. You already made it out, don't throw yourself back in or you won't get out so easily next time.
Tell him to mind his own business if it's good for your mental health.
Also, get a mini tree to keep on your bedside all year long. Change the star to something seasonal – snowflake for for winter, bunny for Easter, little flag for your national holiday, ghost/pumpkin for Halloween, etc.
Cute fairy lights, baubles, tinsel, and MOST IMPORTANTLY, little gifts from you to you, because if you're struggling with mental health then you deserve to treat yourself.
Thank you for this! In December I suggested some trips we could do this year and he said he doesn't want his calendar to get all booked up (fair enough). Yesterday I suggested for Valentines we go back to Germany, we went valentines 2020 (literally just before the big COVID), and he didn't seem keen. It's really naked to talk to him at the moment.
Ask her why TF she thought it was ok to rearrange your underwear drawer?
Just back off and do your own thing. Seems like you valued her more than she valued you. Leave her alone and if she wants to talk she can contact you. Sometimes people just move on for no particular reason.
Don't talk to him, Jesus how is this naked to process?
What's more rude? Not talking to some jackass you don't fucking know because your partner hates him, or disrespecting your partner's wishes and engaging in polite conversation with him because you don't want to be rude to a stranger?
Sounds like he need to fess up to everything that has changed in his ideology and needs to change it all. That’s only step one
This relationship sounds lovely … why aren’t you married and carrying his children yet? /s
About breaks, I generally agree with you. The thing is it was either that or we break up. I decided it's better to at least try.
She didn't date a guy on the break. She started dating him about six months after our first break up. Back then we didn't take a break, we broke up, and in that time I hooked up with a friend as well, so it's not really a problem. And the thing is, she came back to me because she never felt the same with him, but in the end I guess I changed and the guy she came back to wasn't the same guy she dated before.
On the compatibility thing, Might sound like a cope, but I have never felt more compatible with anyone else.
And if it was just her who didn't feel my love, I would treat it differently, but it's not just her. Everyone was was her if I'm okay, so it really must be something up me.
I just feel lost. I know that it can work, because it worked before and worked beautifully. But maybe it's just better for her to let her go.
She used you to get a new house/apt because buying alone is hot especially after divorce.
Just run
You'll feel better in a couple days. Don't move out just yet.
I don’t know what to do, because I truly do love him but this isn’t the same person I knew years ago.
Firstly, you need to acknowledge to yourself that which you already know…this isn't the same person you knew YEARS AGO. He just isn't. Even if he hadn't wandered off into this horrid “I'm the Chauvinist boss” zone, he still wouldn't be the same person you knew years ago. People change a lot at his age. And he doesn't appear to be changing for the better.
So, stop trying to wish him back into being who he once was. Because that guy is gone, and he's never coming back. What you need to do now is to either accept who and what he has become or accept that this relationship has run its course and move on. What does your gut tell you?
You're really willing to die on this hill aren't you. Just because you're insecure doesn't mean others can't build trust. This wasn't your point from the beginning, building trust and being being physically abused aren't the same. Most unhinged reddit user I've seen in a good while.
finally someone else noticed this!
So that’s my question in the first place, what can I do other than “feel really really bad” or breakup?
She'll contact you. Move on with your life.
I’d just point him in the direction of a capture tracker. If he puts everything in he’ll realize how quickly some things add up. But beyond that you really can’t make his choices for him.
?
I think the Reddit blackout wrecked severe havoc
What specifically bothers you about this friendship? What are you most afraid of happening?
Are you scared they'll become friends and ice you out?
Is it the fear of losing your friend that upsets you?
Maybe you are looking at this from the wrong perspective. What if this is a bridge to repairing your relationship with your sister? Your friend might be able to help you mend things. Wouldn't it be incredible to have your sister and your best friend by your side?
I have some friends that are going through this now. One person has depression that makes them a poor partner, not maintaining the household close to 50/50, not able to give support to their partner when their partner needs it, and a few other things have just ended up making the relationship no longer work for the other person. Everyone has needs and while it can be sad for everyone involved, you sometimes have to leave a relationship that can no longer meet your needs.
But also! You have an anxiety disorder which probably means that in your head, your husband is already leaving you and the worst case scenarios are all happening. But that's not necessarily what is happening here – it sounds like he wants you to get better so you can have a life together that meets both your needs. So just focus on yourself and getting better and not freaking out about things that will hopefully not happen. If therapy isn't helping you, consider finding a different therapist.
All I did before was to ask questions to understand the situation. Then I can come up with something to help.
What you do is read over and make insinuations. Read slower to make sure and understand.
She has a boyfriend and doesn’t want him, she thinks he’s gross lol.
He keeps lying because you keep putting up with it. You can stop it if you want to.
So I'll give two:
This used to happen when I first moved out to pursue my Master's. She knew I'd go grocery shopping with my flatmates on Saturday and she also knew that I'd be busy as hell. So on Saturday morning if I decided to sleep in, she'd order groceries beforehand and give me call to say the groceries are on the way. And if I'd ask her to cancel them because I'm going to get them in a couple of hours, she'd say that it's too late to cancel them. I always bit my tongue, but I never knew how to find a much more polite version of “I can see through the BS. Cancel them right now.”
I spoke to her during winter break and she promised she wouldn't do it again, but did it after spring break when my workload became unbearable. I moved back in after my Master's for two months till I found a job and now that I online in a different city again, she's so far kept true to her promise about the groceries. Although she's sent me other stuff and I let it slide for the time being.
This is probably her anxious attachment, but if I haven't updated my whereabouts, she panics. I could have a long day at work and forget to text that I'm staying over a couple of hours and right on the dot after 6 pm “son? All ok?”. Other times if let's say I'm in the shower on like a Saturday, if I don't pick up the phone, she'll keep calling until I finally call back once I've finished my bloody shower
Less than a month ago you were posting about your boyfriend you’d recently moved in with, who wouldn’t let you bring a chair into the apartment because you’d been r*ped on it. And now you’re marrying him tomorrow?
I’m inclined to believe this is a troll post, but on the remote chance that it’s not – don’t marry him for god’s sake.
This is exactly what I was thinking.
The real issue that you're dating a 21 year old
Very simple response and make sure it is publicly stated. Next time he says it, stop dead still and very calmly but loudly say:
“I appreciate the compliment on my appearance but the fact that you’re old enough to be my father and have known me since I was a baby, and waited until I turned 18 is creepy as fuck you groomer pedofile. I’m 18 and the child of one of your friends. You might think you are bing funny or harmless, but clearly you are socially inept and have ignored the last 10 years of sexual harassment issues discussed in the news. I don’t care if you think I NEED A REAL MAN because if you think that a real man behaves like a fucking creep, I’ll proudly become a lesbian. Now if you really want to ACT LIKE A REAL MAN then apologize for your creepy behavior and don’t do it again, or you can act like a complete jackass and get all butthurt about being called out for your inappropriate behavior and start lashing out at a young girl that is clearly more mature and socially aware than you.”
Never spend another dollar on your family. No cards, Christmas or birthday presents. Handle it that way. If anyone asks, say the money is going to pay for the dress. No wedding, bridal or baby shower gifts for either sister.
So you both have $150k or just you? I just want to make sure I'm understanding correctly how much you each have in savings. If it's only you, then sorry no house until he saves $150k.