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Okay, so you just came here to be a jerk and not actually offer advice on my post in an advice sub.
File a police report asap. This could be a pattern of behaviour.
you are right about that
It won't help to point the finger and say “x is to blame that the marriage don't work”. Maybe it will make you feel better if it isn't you, but does it help your situation? You are in an unhappy relationship. And you should be honest with yourself: What needed to be fixed that this relationship is happy and fulfilling for you and can this really be archieved? I think you already had your answer long before. And whenever someone writes such posts, they at least write one time that they love there partner. You wrote much but not one time that you love her… not that love is a reason to stay. Actually you talk about her not so nice. So why do you even think about counseling? So that you don't end up as the “bad guy” and can say you tried anything? But nobody keep scores! You just waste your time.
You are just 33. You have 50+ years before you. Do you want to stay in an unhappy sexless marriage or start new and get a chance to find happiness?
Point 5 is absolutely insane. Have you never needed relationship advice from similar who shares a similar perspective as your partner??
I’ve seen one but she isnt much help asides from giving me antidepressants. I’ve talked to counselors and all that who’ve been a lot more helpful though!