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“I went to see him in his room but as soon as I rang the bell I knew what a big mistake I was making. I hardly spent 2-3 minutes in the room before I ran out of there”….stop the ?
Too late for that. Tell him and hope you are forgiven, that's all you can do. The sooner you tell him, the better your chances are
Yes a ton. It's incredible. When we would visit each other it was non stop. Now living together it's still like 3 times a week. Which I know I should be grateful for and I am.
you deserve to be with someone who understands your situation and is willing to support you and not make you feel like you have to choose between him and your career. communicate with him, and if he can’t deal, then honestly it’s not worth it. do you really need that constant added stress in your life? it will not get better, only worse.
That can only happen so long as the ex in question doesn’t hold onto what could’ve been and chooses to hold resentment towards the man or woman in question.
You could do everything right and have the most understanding conversation before parting ways, but love and hatred are the deciding emotions over the reality that yes, a good and healthy relationship ended, you’ve learned from it and can now take the steps towards seeking out romantic interests who can give you a similar experience.
But the other person might not be willing to see it that way or be willing to accept it at first and try to hold onto those memories and thus be seen as the bitter ex.
This guy sounds like a Jeffery Dahmer, PLEASE get away from him NOW! I'm dead serious!
Okay, so. You feel that you made a mistake.
But plenty of women have chosen to not report and not regretted it and plenty of women have chosen to report and regretted it.
The statute of limitations for SA is like… Ten years so, if you feel that strongly about it you can probably still report it!
But either way, it's not your responsibility or OPs girlfriends responsibility or any victims responsibility to stop rapists from raping.
Guys, get a grip on reality. The only one who cares how huge your dick is is you. Your partner wants your attention and intimacy – a big dick provides neither.
A few of my exes were way above average. I’ve met a few guys even bigger that I wouldn’t even attempt. “Bigger” is a turn off for me, and many women I know, as we are not built for that.
Anything above “average” hurts like crazy and is zero fun for TONS of women. Sure, some are size queens who love a deep ride, but that also means they’ve got a deep slot!
Be glad you have what you do, and that it works so well – lots of guys don’t even have that!
No, please don't take the car back, just invite her husband to hangout or something.
Is this your first time being rejected or something? Move on already
Tell him that his actions and especially his lying to you, was really hurtful, and you need to take a break for a while. And then take as much time as you need and if/when you’re ready, go back to your friendship. If you really want to be petty, when you let him know that you are taking a break, you can say something along the lines of “I didn’t realize our 12 year friendship meant so little to you. So I just need to reevaluate some of my relationships.”
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I definitely wouldn’t say abusive but definitely highly inconsiderate, unfair and uneducated. Honestly, my responses were verbally abusive and there’s no excuse for that either.
Something helpful that I've left out is that In the past, I've had troubles climaxing when being intimate with her due to me having masturbated recently. I think it's safe to say that most couples would prefer it if both parties are able to climax during sex.
Oh yes he is abusive. Check if he has a police record for domestic violence (or anything else); in the UK this is known as Clare's Law, but other countries have their own version.
You sound very together, so you may be strong enough to challenge him directly on what he's saying, make clear that it's unacceptable and that you'll finish things if he doesn't take it back and show he knows why it's wrong.
If you were my friend, though, I'd say go straight to the police and dump him because this isn't going to end well.
There’s nothing to apologize for. She’s feeling hurt over something she did to herself.
I'm sure that's what he's envisioning but it's not like that at all. When I'm putting my pads on, my junk is exposed for 3-4 seconds tops while I'm taking my boxers off and putting my shorts on. If there's a woman on our team, I'll bend over (ass facing the wall) to cover up as much as possible while I'm putting my shorts on.
Most of the locker rooms at my rink have a separate shower room with a door but in the ones that don't, I don't get undressed for a shower if a woman in is there with us and I haven't seen any guys that do.
Another poster corrected me that when women’s teams use those facilities they use the team rooms.
There’s an argument to be made that we as a society are too hung up on nudity, but OP’s particular case is OP being uncomfortable with his partner doing a socially unusual thing where they are seeing their opposite sex teammates nude.
The more important issue is that OP isn’t comfortable and the boundary isn’t unreasonable.
I would say if he wasn't bugging you about the clothing and being around men, you are probably fine. But those two things are huge red flags.
Giving you a harsh reply as you need to hear this. You aren't stuck. You are lazy. Assets can be split. Relationships end every day. You don't want to marry him. Why subject you and him to a miserable, unfulfilled marriage and god forbid bring children into it because why not?
My friend wasted years of her life after saying yes to the wrong man. She is now with the right one but regrets not being stringer and saying no.
You do know that a lot of relationships out there have boundaries when it comes to porn usage.
If you’re uncomfortable with your partner watching porn inside your relationship, it’s completely normal to exclude it. A lot of people view it as a form of disrespect and a type of cheating.
This is a normal boundary to put into place.
You’ve already gotten some solid advice, so I just want to tell you that I’m sorry this happened to you, and it’s 100% not your fault whatsoever, and also whatever you’re feeling is completely justified so don’t let anyone in this situation guilt trip you into thinking you’re supposed to be “the bigger person” or whatever iteration they might come up with. You’re the victim here, and it sucks
Brother, if she threatens you that she will commit suicide if you break up, it is first and foremost a way to manipulate you. She'll break you this way using her issues as something you might find pity or sympathy in. Take care of yourself and bail out of that terrible relationship. It is highly unlikely she'll follow through especially knowing that she cheated on you. She'll definitely have a “back-up” guy shortly after you've broken up.
Source: my ex was kinda like this
“so either my expectations are unrealistic or he is a douche”
You actually missed the third option; that you both are simply not compatible in your wants, needs, desires, and/or thought processes.
– when i asked why he let the guy push me around he said it was cause he didn’t want to start a fight
The guy obviously didn't shove you to the ground; he elbowed his way into the situation. So your bf is non-confrontational. He didn't see a need to force a confrontation. You wanted that confrontation to occur.
– i personally don’t want my bf watching porn. guys who watch porn sexualizs bodies way too much and it makes me really uncomfortable.
Your bf watches porn. You don't like it.
– i said i didn’t like one of his girl friend and he decided that that meant that he should stay friends with her while dating me
You don't like someone. He does enough to stay friendly with that person.
Someone doesn't have to unreasonable, or a douche, to have a difference of opinion on situations. You can simply be incompatible based on how you approach situations, view a situation, and respond to a situation.
If you're that incompatible, you two may want to sit down, have a very long talk, and either come to a compromise, or, discuss if the incompatibility is too much and if you should just stop, allowing each other to find a more compatible partner.
This was a terrible mistake but you should be honest. Your girlfriend deserves the truth and you have to online with the consequences of your mistake. Not saying the truth is not a good for a relationship. Be honest to her and also think about what the reasons were for you to did this. Being drunken is not a excuse and also imo not the only reason.
This was a terrible mistake but you should be honest. Your girlfriend deserves the truth and you have to online with the consequences of your mistake. Not saying the truth is not a good for a relationship. Be honest to her and also think about what the reasons were for you to did this. Being drunken is not a excuse and also imo not the only reason.
THAT'S how you play.
Honestly, it seems to me that you want it all your way. Separate, but still hugs… visits on your terms… he’s required to be a certain way…
When he said, “I got to thinking about things,” he probably started to see how controlling you are being. How you want to be “his wife,” but not have to BE his wife.
You should just get a divorce and let him move on.
lol “wasband” I like that!
So your child doesn’t get to share either of your last names…? For something you admittedly don’t care about it sounds like you’re thinking quite a bit about yourselves and how ‘progressive’ you are.
I'd say 1 in 10 guys or maybe 2 in 15 guys prob don't want kids.
(Speaking as a man that doesn't want kids and has none himself.)
As you get older I'd say the amount who don't want any and don't have any gets less and less though.
Since its a group chat with friends, he could just ask if they could change it.. at this point, nobody saying anything means that they all agree that this is alright. But maybe it would be an opportunity to reflect.
None of that sounds like an actual plan though. At best, it sounds like a wish.
Maybe you're leaving something out, but it sounds like you're judging your boyfriend for having been financially dependent on his parents until now even though you're in the exact same position yourself.
The key difference seems to be that while his parents may have cut him off, your parents are still supporting you financially.
I'm only on here currently because I'm stuck at my 8-5 with all my tasks done and came here simply to express my situation and how it's impacted me. My only ways of dealing with stress is going to the gym that I limit out of consideration of her workload with school. I have to drop off my son early in the mornings nearly every day and the days that she can I try to go at 4-5am. Something that is nude to do already with very little sleep. I'm not trying to come up with excuses but it's clear to me that maybe you don't understand the difficulties of work/life balance when you have a kid, and how much time you ultimately lose.
let me tell you something son.
you are never, going to be more miserable, than being the sober person around drunk people.
it is truly a fucking aweful experience, as 90% of people are annoying, weird, dramatic, or angsty when they are drunk.
that being said, you were only saying no because of some societal pressure to “look good”. I mean, use your better judgement, was she trashed, or did she very much seem to have her facilities in order and she was just tipsy.
youre sexually frustrated, rub one out. then chill.
It's a silly story with nude people in it, i used to read them, some are better than others and they are an easy mindless read and you can gush about characters and their relationships. They are usually fairly predictable and everyone is an archetype so you know what to expect, it's comforting to an extent
Your mother is right, but what you can do is be boyfriend and girlfriend for the time being. You should avoid taking over all his care. Enjoy each other in the moment.
You're a bit too young to make a permanent commitment anyway. Be cautious about your feelings for him making you sacrifice your own health and happiness.
So if I told a black person “I never thought I'd be with a black girl” or “you're not white enough to do x” That'd be colorism?
You think this will still apply to a partner you've admitted you are not attracted to?
Have you been masturbating or watching porn more frequently?
This can also cause issues with how long you last.
who cares? he's your ex, I think you should quit sexting him
Depends on the working relationship I guess. I respect that they aren't going to stay forever , and I'll keep them if they don't leave. I don't like to make emotional business decisions , people come and go.
I can imagine many other employers would be tempted to take the “fuck you then” route.
I think you misunderstood my post. I mention grades once, alongside experience. In my country it is very rare to get a full-time job in your field after graduating without some other work experience.
I think my partner is extremely competent & deserving of the job.
a child with this trash heap. Those ties aren’t gonna be cut
They can be mostly cut. They're not married. Details may vary in UK, but approximately: He'll be on the hook for child support. She mostly doesn't have to deal with him at all if she doesn't want. He may want child visitation rights, but if she says no, he's got a court battle to get that – he may get none, or only supervised visitation rights. Until he's got his sh*t quite together, it's improbable he'd get unsupervised visitation rights. And judged by the police to have attempted suicide by crashing his car, quite unlikely he'd get unsupervised visitation rights anytime in the near future. And, as OP stated, he's got past drug problems? Yeah, I don't think he'd be getting unsupervised visitation rights anytime soon … maybe never. And if he ain't quite got his sh*t together, he may not have much – if anything – in the way of resources to battle and push for visitation rights – so that may also quite hamper him getting supervised, or especially unsupervised, visitation rights. Also, if she refuses to name him as father on the birth certificate, he may have fair battle to even get named on birth certificate and even start to get any parental rights … that'd probably require him battling/challenging that, and court to order paternity test. If he ain't legally the dad, he ain't got sh*t … but if he ain't legally the dad, she won't get child support from him … but can't squeeze blood from a stone – he may be a worthless broke deadbeat as far as child support goes anyway.
And, depending also upon his misbehaviors – restraining order may also keep him well clear of mom – and baby. Regardless of any legal paternity/father bits.
Threatening you into doing what she wants and making her number one at others expense isn't a relationship. You can't do better with Tiffany or Kelly if you allow Amanda to act this way.
If you doubt that your child is yours, you doubt that your partner is faithful. That’s an accusation buddy.
Doesn’t matter what anyone thinks.
He’s not going to do it. Now what?
He views finances very differently. Time to have a discussion on it and how you both view it.
Can you accept his views?
Does it works with the future you both want?
Thank you 😀
I just read this reply of yours after posting my comment. Maybe you should have a heart to heart with him. It could simply be insecurity rearing it’s ugly head, and he may just need reassurance that you love him. But no matter what, first communicate, communicate, communicate, and please do not regress.
Here's the thing – you're losing precious time over someone who's a bad fit for you. No matter how resilient you are, you can't get back your time.
He has requested time, so you give him time.
Once you've broken up, he's not a cheater,and owes no explanation of what he's doing with his time…. No way of knowing whether he just wants to sit in a ball and cry alone or what.
One thing: If he has requested space and no contact from YOU, you should insist on the same for yourself. You can't move on if he's constantly hitting you up with “I miss you” crap. If he does not honor that, my sincere advice would be to block his number.
I would sit your dad down and have an adult conversation with him. Let him know that, while you DO appreciate his offer, your step mom doesn't respect you. Tell him that you are uncomfortable living with someone who does make your life harder. If he gets upset then so be it.
Rent. Is the money saved worth living in amongst all this stress and anxiety? No it's not.
This conversation isn’t about finances
If he doesn't want to take you, deal with it. You've been emotionally manipulating him since January about thism let it the fuck go
Letting her go out?? Boy please! Lol
Why would you even consider being friends with a controlling, abusive, alcoholic? Love is one thing but you went back to that. Get a new phone number if you can't block him. That's what I did. It wasn't nude at all. Don't hang out or be friends ever again. Once he cleans up he'll come crawling back to you. Stay strong. If he wanted to get better for you it would be done and he'd be working on himself instead of abusing you.
If you’re that depressed you are not Rattling other men in your new fancy undies believe me. You are being used and lied to and cheated on. Dude. You need to kick this loser out.
All through your post you don't explain what your BF did to hurt you ? Yet from the post I can clearly see why he does not want to be in a relationship with you .
You need to seek help and work on your mental health . Such toxicity will only harm you and any future relationships
Listen to the professionals
the fact he seems to have slept with every women he has introduced you at cons and such is a red flag. The Comic/Manga/Pop Culture circles are quite the type to attract predators of all sorts and the fact he also cheated on you once (that you know off) adds up to the creepy vibes he's giving me through the way you tell your story.
I did the same thing at first, I found it really degrading. It was uncomfortable at first, but when I approached the conversation I tried to focus on explaining how it made me feel, not that I thought he was weird or disgusting for doing it. Once he understood how I felt, he apologized and explained he started doing it because he was single for a long time before we met, and his friends were doing it so he just kind of fell into it with them sharing these insta pages with him. I think it helps if you keep as much judgement out of it as you can, try to understand his explanation and make your feelings clear. We have always had really good communication between us though, I think that helped a lot.