sometimes it's kinder to hurt someone with the truth than it is to hurt them over and over by lying..
hurting someone really sucks, i hate dumping ppl and I've stayed too long because of it. it is so much worse in the longrun, stringing someone along
you wanted him to believe that you loved him, and maybe you recognized that this was a temporary infatuation and didn't want to make decisions based on that. maybe you know you and your friend would never work despite the crush. but you should have stayed away and worked on repairing your relationship OR ripped off the bandaid and left
instead you dragged someone through lie after lie whilst you indulged your infatuation. you hurt someone because you were a coward. you hurt him so you wouldn't need to feel bad about your choices and worse.. you're glad he dumped you because now you don't need to do your own dirty work
you need to be brave sometimes, even when it sucks, even when he will hate you for it. one day he will appreciate the kindness you did. and next time you can sleep a little better knowing you spared him from the cruelty you did to your ex
Well, her other partner does not get snooped on, but he absolutely despises the husband for other unrelated reasons. So it's a very unhealthy dynamic at best. The other boyfriend and I get along well and respect boundaries, and we both have vented to each other about the husband's ridiculous behaviors.
I don't think so at all. But people certainly do take it personal. I recently quit a popular social media app, only because I never used the app so I took it off my phone. One 'friend' proceeded to unfriend and block me on every other social media app. When I asked her about it she told me I was being childish?? People take it very personal.
LMAO βI canβt leave her because she loves me so muchβ
Dude you sound like a complete and utter ass. You want to feel some strange? Break up. Itβs not like sheβs threatening you with a gun over a breakup, itβs just that YOU donβt have the balls to break up with her.
Iβd suggest not marry him or moving in till either she moves or he is ready to move. He needs to start thinking about you and what this potential marriage is gonna look like
Normally I would be 100% in the bash the cheater mindset. But several things about this situation don't sound right.
I'd love to know how much protest OP's mom put up when she first heard about the DNA tests. Maybe I'm naive, but if I were a woman and I had ANY question who the father of my child was, I would have done something to keep that test from happening. If the sex with some other man related to OP's dad was non-consensual and she was trying to protect anyone, she wouldn't want it. If she knew she'd cheated, she wouldn't want it. If the samples were sent off she'd be worried about the results.
She could be delusional thinking if she doesn't admit / open up, it never happened. She may have blocked something traumatic out. The most likely anser IS she cheated and is being stubborn for some reason. But her actions and reactions weren't / aren't rational.
You thought going on vacation with a newborn would allow you to “recharge”? Hahaha, that's a laugh… While I wholeheartedly agree with travel with babies, there is nothing easy or relaxing about it. I just assume you are new parents in a stressful period and emotions are high. The newborn days suck.
Since you give ZERO explanation of what happened, no one can offer advice. But I do see a lot of “wife blaming” going on here. When someone is very angry at another, it is rarely for no reason and the recipient is rarely completely innocent.
I'm saying this as a mom, block this guy on everything and run. He is a walking red flag, and his behavior will just get worse. Do you really want to deal with his issues and mind games? You deserve better than someone who lies to and manipulates you, strings you along, and puts you down.
My skin looks great…just gotta have the right tools and know how to do it
I will, thank you for your input!
Uhm…. please quote that part?
sometimes it's kinder to hurt someone with the truth than it is to hurt them over and over by lying..
hurting someone really sucks, i hate dumping ppl and I've stayed too long because of it. it is so much worse in the longrun, stringing someone along
you wanted him to believe that you loved him, and maybe you recognized that this was a temporary infatuation and didn't want to make decisions based on that. maybe you know you and your friend would never work despite the crush. but you should have stayed away and worked on repairing your relationship OR ripped off the bandaid and left
instead you dragged someone through lie after lie whilst you indulged your infatuation. you hurt someone because you were a coward. you hurt him so you wouldn't need to feel bad about your choices and worse.. you're glad he dumped you because now you don't need to do your own dirty work
you need to be brave sometimes, even when it sucks, even when he will hate you for it. one day he will appreciate the kindness you did. and next time you can sleep a little better knowing you spared him from the cruelty you did to your ex
It could also mean that he just doesnt think much of it
Well, her other partner does not get snooped on, but he absolutely despises the husband for other unrelated reasons. So it's a very unhealthy dynamic at best. The other boyfriend and I get along well and respect boundaries, and we both have vented to each other about the husband's ridiculous behaviors.
Am I even in the wrong for doing this?
I don't think so at all. But people certainly do take it personal. I recently quit a popular social media app, only because I never used the app so I took it off my phone. One 'friend' proceeded to unfriend and block me on every other social media app. When I asked her about it she told me I was being childish?? People take it very personal.
LMAO βI canβt leave her because she loves me so muchβ
Dude you sound like a complete and utter ass. You want to feel some strange? Break up. Itβs not like sheβs threatening you with a gun over a breakup, itβs just that YOU donβt have the balls to break up with her.
Cheating just makes you scum.
Iβd suggest not marry him or moving in till either she moves or he is ready to move. He needs to start thinking about you and what this potential marriage is gonna look like
Normally I would be 100% in the bash the cheater mindset. But several things about this situation don't sound right.
I'd love to know how much protest OP's mom put up when she first heard about the DNA tests. Maybe I'm naive, but if I were a woman and I had ANY question who the father of my child was, I would have done something to keep that test from happening. If the sex with some other man related to OP's dad was non-consensual and she was trying to protect anyone, she wouldn't want it. If she knew she'd cheated, she wouldn't want it. If the samples were sent off she'd be worried about the results.
She could be delusional thinking if she doesn't admit / open up, it never happened. She may have blocked something traumatic out. The most likely anser IS she cheated and is being stubborn for some reason. But her actions and reactions weren't / aren't rational.
It is never ok to confront someone at work.
You thought going on vacation with a newborn would allow you to “recharge”? Hahaha, that's a laugh… While I wholeheartedly agree with travel with babies, there is nothing easy or relaxing about it. I just assume you are new parents in a stressful period and emotions are high. The newborn days suck.
Since you give ZERO explanation of what happened, no one can offer advice. But I do see a lot of “wife blaming” going on here. When someone is very angry at another, it is rarely for no reason and the recipient is rarely completely innocent.
You donβt think itβs selfish to keep a relationship breaking secret for nearly a decade so you can keep up appearances?
I'm saying this as a mom, block this guy on everything and run. He is a walking red flag, and his behavior will just get worse. Do you really want to deal with his issues and mind games? You deserve better than someone who lies to and manipulates you, strings you along, and puts you down.