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wolfiekitty, 23 y.o.
Location: United States
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Literally what is wrong with you. Is it childhood trauma? I can give you a couple of therapists cards!
Any reason on why you shouldn't propose on a holiday or event? I know she was disappointed it didn't happen at Christmas when all of our family was over, hope that lends a little backstory
You've let her know that you're interested. She's let you know that it's not going to work. You can't make her change her mind. The best you can do is easing off and coming to terms with that. The more you try to push her, the more she'll push you away.