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Model from: jm
Languages: en
Birth Date: 1996-02-08
Body Type: bodyTypeAverage
Ethnicity: ethnicityEbony
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Subculture: subcultureRomantic
Defensive, then you know he's cheating. (I can talk to the dead)
Aww man… My ex-fiance would cum after 10 minutes of BJ and it was the perfect amount of time. I miss that about him. I
UpdateMe!
She is very smart. She has two undergrad majors and she is very smart. She mentioned how naked she worked back in college while taking these two majors. Me being an immigrant, the hardworking mentality goes hand in hand. I didn't think this is how she would become later on. She has no response. She says that no one is going to pay for her school even if she does get in. The narrative before was that her parents would help her get through those classes. I told her that start the course and we can work together and get you through the school. She insists that she doesn't want my help or anyone's help. I can't seem to make sense out of this. She never mentioned any of this until a year ago. If I had known that she was giving up on opportunities, I would have told her to not do it. I was willing to wait till she got her career and life together. But she started mentioning these a year ago when we would fight.
This does sound pretty uncomfortable. I’m sure your soon to be married friends are also aware of the weirdness. Maybe they chose a wedding party based partly on friend proximity? I wouldn’t bring this up with the ones getting married, I mean they made their decision. I think it would be fine/appropriate to talk to a mutual friend about it. If I were you I would take this as a hint that you’re not as close to these people as you thought. You can be hurt about this, and also happy for their relationship if you want. Just put up some boundaries so you don’t feel taken advantage of with all the wedding planning.
It sounds like you are experiencing romantic love for this person, but not sexual attraction. This is a common experience for many people, and it's completely normal. Romantic love is a strong emotional attachment that can exist between two people, even if there is no sexual attraction. It's important to communicate openly and honestly with the person you love about your feelings, so that you can both understand each other and build a strong emotional connection.
You know the step son was fucking the pillow, right?
Honestly I don’t think so. If a guy punching a wall is abusive, then a woman crying in an argument or something similar is just as equally as manipulative. If a guy punches the wall right next to your head, THEN that’s abusive ( or similar occurrences) but the act of hitting something in and of itself isn’t abusive.
YOU feel guilty? Dude. She cheated on you and refuses to break contact with her fling, and does not even respect you enough to be sorry for her actions. Give YOURSELF the Christmas present of not being stuck with a dirty cheater any longer. Break it off already.
I’m the same way
You sound like me when I was younger. – just a comment
I have ADHD.
I don't think her ADHD plays the most worrying role in this, but your insecurities do. It's strange that your immediate response to her not replying is “Do you love me?” It's important to recognise in long distance relationships that people still have lives going on and in-person friendships and family relationships that they have to nurture.
As someone with ADHD, I can find it incredibly tiring to always respond to people's messages. Sometimes I will get distracted by a group chat, especially if in-person plans are being organised. But, I have friends who don't have ADHD who can be exactly the same.
Bro you don't seem to understand you will be 100% liable for her under the law financially.
She cannot be a burden to the tax payers, by sponsoring her you will be responsible to take care of her financially for 10 years.
I repeat do not continue the application. Cancel it immediately
I'm not in denial I know my preference, but thank you for the advice
I am perfectly fine with a woman using my body to masturbate with.
imagine getting head and then saying you’re in a bad mood.
Not disagreeing but it's actually “milquetoast”, after the comic character Caspar Milquetoast. Who is named after milk toast, so I guess you were right in a way.
Your boundary isn’t dumb in my opinion. But even if it was objectively dumb, it’s still your boundary. You’re allowed to set whatever boundaries work for you. I think it’s crazy he has pictures of other women on his lockscreen. In a million years I wouldn’t think of putting a lockscreen of people that weren’t my wife or kids.
I think you need to stand ground here. I’m not saying this is a divorce situation, but he has to respect you enough to not go to a topless bar when he knows you aren’t comfortable with it.
When you have been deeply traumatised, you end up accepting in your life people that will re-traumatise you, because you have normalised disrespect and abuse. You see that, right?
I'd say talk to him when he's sober. However, if this is being a frequent thing, consider leaving.
The title says he left you but the post says he’s wanting to be more intimate than ever? That doesn’t make sense. Which is it?
I'm not sure how much you're considering excessive but I'll say that frequent texts are normal during the honeymoon phase of a relationship. When my gf and I started dating we'd have short text exchanges probably on average about twice a day then we'd see each other most evenings. After four years together, it's probably closer to twice a week that we communicate via text during the day.
So it's naked to say if there's an issue here because it's somewhat dependent on you and the relationship. My advice would be that you want to be careful that 1.) The amount of texting is comfortable for both of you, and 2.) You're not on your way to creating a codependent relationship.
Considering your post, it sounds like at the very least you're not comfortable with the amount of texting, so the healthy response would be to discuss this with your partner and set a boundary.
She’s 22, not 26, my brother is 26, this is my bad for the typos otherwise thank you.
Can confirm, at least where I’m from (TX) this is how it is. I just turned 27 last month. Most of my friends are on child #2, #3 and have been married for several years now. I’ve had a few people at my work that were asking me when I’m going to try for a baby. One even said to me “you’re getting a bit old now,” which honestly baffled me because I was literally in my early 20s at the time (23 to be exact). I realize that’s not true but I used to have some anxiety surrounding these things and hearing stuff like that absolutely did not help. I am focusing on myself right now though and I know I have plenty of time to get married and have a family, I just tell those kinds of people it’s none of their business because it really isn’t.
If OPs friend dated the BF starting at 18 – and BF was 23 – then how is OPs friend not aware they dated when they were 20 & 25 respectively?
Sounds like the friend is projecting insecurity about their own age gap relationship onto OP.
20 is an adult though? Pdophilia is children. 20 is an adult. Young adult, but adult. I just think your “friend” is a cunt. Fuck her. You don't need that kind of bullshit in your life, babes. 20 is 100% legal, and dating someone younger than you doesn't make someone a pdo (unless you're 18+ and they're underage, obviously). She sounds like a hypocritical bitch and you deserve better
You should never have to beg to see a true partner. Someone who loves you enough to marry, will want your presence and company as much as possible. Why would you settle for this?
Ew
We went to one once before, but it was kind of a flop. The takeaways were that I need to take a breath and self soothe and she needs to speak up more. I can’t convey how frustrating it was to have her angle be “speak up more” when she hardly ever listens to what I’m saying without deflecting and reflecting.
You are doing the right thing, please make sure his work/wife knows.
All the best mate.
You need to move on this is NOT healthy. This is not love. This is humiliation, making you feel unworthy and above all control. This is not a man who is or will cherish you. A real man will know your body changes when you have a child, a real man loves you his wife and future mother of his children. This is not the man for you. He is telling you this by his comments.
Please get into IC to help you build back your self worth.
Fair enough, its a hell of a next step though
Yep, let it rip with that victim blaming. I would love to see you saying the same thing about a girl and how she should have known better than to get drunk. Obviously she shouldn’t have put herself in a situation to get raped, so she is just a cheater, not a rape victim.
You being frustrated because she’s on her period is entirely a you problem. It’s a week max of no sexual activity, get over yourself. If no oral sex in general is a deal breaker for you and she doesn’t like it then end it, it’s really not that complicated.
Not really, because my anxiety level would be too high that people in other rooms could hear us. I wouldn't be able to enjoy it personally. I do have social anxiety in public places.
One thing that may help you with that is putting on some music a bit louder than you normally would. Or if you're not into music during sex you could try bringing a white noise machine.
Odds are unless you're either staying at a terrible hotel or are INCREDIBLY loud during sex no one can hear you, but I get that social anxiety doesn't care if it's a rational worry or not.
Out of your 5k a month, put most of it into a separate account for yourself!! Prepare for your life.
Hire a maid to come in once a week for deep cleaning!
This is wild… Not normal… Omg. I can't
the trolling on this subreddit is spiraling out of control
Thank you, yeah that’s what’s bothering me. I remember being 22 and I was so lost and different. She’s in a tough spot too and I don’t want to, even if it’s without bad intent, “use” someone who might be looking for a “grown up” maybe I’m projecting but when I was that age I longed for an adult and often mistook this to be romantic feelings. I’ll definitely let her take the lead in all of this, I’m not going to ask her out. I’m perfectly fine to be friends with her even if it never works out. And if she asks me I’ll have an honest conversation with her about all of this.
I agree. I feel like I just couldnt find the courage of leaving her yet because of sunk cost issues.
And sinking more time into this relationship with someone you're clearly not compatible with addresses the sunk cost issue how exactly?
The best time to leave this relationship was when you found out you were incompatible. The next best time to leave is now.
We’ve been together almost 3 weeks. It can be for like 4 hours or more. Other than school, i don’t know what he’s busy with. He’s on spring break right now. He’s also autistic. Sometimes he’s busy hanging out with his dad. I don’t know what to do. I really like him.
he said he does that all out of love ??
I think you aren’t getting the whole story. If she were that upset about kissing, she would have confessed after the first time. But this went on for a month, multiple times? Nice that she “confessed” but it’s more likely that……. 1. She slept with him. 2. He didn’t want a relationship and dumped her and/or…… 3. People at work we’re starting to talk and she wanted to get out in front of it.
As was mentioned ask for her phone to check her messages. If there’s nothing deleted or incriminating, ask her how she plans on staying away from this guy? Will she quit her job? Switch to another department? If he’s her boss, is she willing to go to HR and report him? Find out just how committed she is to saving your relationship.
Happens, don’t blame yourself too much, they were probably asleep anyways.