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Your post was removed for the following reason(s):
Your title did not include at least two ages/genders or was not formatted correctly
Posts must:
include details about the involved parties including ages, genders, and length of relationship, and
request advice in real situations involving two or more people
We are enforcing the two rules listed above by making all titles start with ages/genders in the following format:
[##X][##X], [## X][## X], or [##-X][##-X] where ## is the age and X is the gender (currently M, F, T, A, NB, FTM, MTF but more can be added). You can have more than two ages/genders listed, but you must have at least two at the beginning of your title. Here is an example:
I do cam modeling. I also work a normal job and go to college. I have 3 kids to support. I hid it from my bf at first becuase I myself wasn't comfortable with it. I had to adjust. I felt like I had to do it. I was behind on the mortgage and very scared. I told him and he was ok with it. He said he understood why i am doing it and knows i truly love him. If you aren't ok with it then end things. Simple as that. I guess I got lucky.
If I asked my friend to pick up my car and they got in an accident I’d pay for the damage myself.
If OP were drunk or being reckless that’s own thing but accidents happen and this one happened while doing a favor for the friend. At the very least the bill should be split.
This is bad news. He wants to do the sex with you.
If he promises you there will be separate beds, there will likely later be some “mix up” and the room will have only one bed. You'll be stuck 2-3 hours from home with no where else to stay and your options then will not be good.
Just forget this “opportunity” and pretend he never offered it.
You need to find a way to accept what he has to offer. I you can't be happy with limited attention, this isn't the right person for you to be in a relationship with. You cannot change the fundamental parts of a person's personality and you shouldn't try. It will just make you both miserable.
Yes! I wish I had an award bc this is the only response that gets it.
We can’t say why he’s being cruel, but it doesn’t really matter. Ultimately he’s intentionally hurting OP, and that’s unacceptable treatment from someone who professes to love you.
Leave his sexuality on the floor and focus on the fact that he's spent the entire marriage cheating on you. Who cares what kind of genitals he was cheating on you with, cheating is cheating.
I’m guessing you thankfully don’t suffer from depression. It’s not that you’re demanding it’s that you don’t fully understand what she’s going through. If you want to do something try engaging her and how’s she managing her depression. Is she talking to anybody? Is she going to therapy? Is she taking antidepressants? You could try to incorporate healthy habits when you are with her like instead of watching a movie going out for a walk.
Her behavior right now is self destructive so there’s little to no room to be there for you.
I think termination is the best choice, but I can also understand why you're sad. Look into support groups for TFMR as that is certainly part of the reason for this decision given GF health issues. I think therapy for you is a good idea too.
Reading through some of your other comments and posts, and yeah, really does just seem like she’s just enjoying the attention and probably doesn’t mean anything by it. Maybe some small chance she could have a one off night with you, but most likely she just really likes you as a person, enjoys the attention, and it probably feels safe for her to do in a way that may not be as safe feeling doing with a guy she knew was into her. Everyone likes compliments, and it’s nice to feel desirable, and she may just be sorta basking in that for a moment.
Considering that she seems to have leveled with you about the possibilities and you stuck around, I can’t exactly blame her or say she’s the bad guy here, but you may want to have a bit of a talk about it. Or, you know, enjoy the view while it lasts. It’s really going to be about how well you can deal with it going forward.
and spammed for the 7th time today? OCD troll/spammed confirmed..get some professional help. edit: guess we will just have to wait about 5 min for your next spam post since this one is deleted and about 2 min away from being removed(go ahead and fire up another new account)
since you like spamming..here us a spammed reply tone of your. hundreds of old trolling attempts
Don't even tell the parents until after the wedding. You don't need more stress now.
I never took my husbands' surnames when I married. I've always just been me. This is more common among professional women, though not universally. Anyway, you and your partner can do whatever you want. The families will just have to adapt.
Aside from her bringing up another story about her ex, which you have stated you don’t like and is a perfectly reasonable boundary, I don’t see anything wrong here. You sound majorly insecure and to be honest so does she. It sounds like you just want a reason to be super jealous and are overthinking everything.
Dude, you just posted about going on a family vacation. I You cant vacation with corpses. Stop lying about the living being dead. Death isnt a joke. You grannie didnt reserect unless we are in a zombie apocalypse. But just in case I'll phone the Ghost Busters.
The problems you’re causing are likely the arguments she’s instigating with her own man after she accuses him of looking at you. My advice is to enjoy modesty day at the Amish Institute of Fashion and just quietly allow her to fuck up her relationships without any direct involvement from you.
Is there a dress code? Other than seeing a person freezing in the cold or exposing their perineum, how do clothes cause upset? She behaving like you’re wearing swas tickas.
You can tell him, “love isn’t enough for relationships to work. Moral alignment is one more component. Respect and communication are others too. Obviously we’re missing at least 3 of them.”
One thing I will give both of us is that we’ve always maintained a really respectful relationship towards each other in front of our kids. He has my back and I have his as parents, now as partner’s completely different story. I hope that if he chooses to go he will become the best version of himself which will make him a better father.
Why do you even have the video?? Like genuinely curious how you can say you love your current gf if you have sex tapes of of your ex blowing you still ?
She has a husband. You are the other guy.
He doesn’t care about you but he does like using you as his servant. You need to find a way to leave.
Major red flag.
Hello /u/curvynofacegirl,
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You sound like a misogynistic asshat, and they sound like a psycho manipulator…
Cut them off and reflect on why you said what you said.
this doesn’t make much sense. i can be insecure and in a relationship, and this one factor isnt a dealbreaker theyre simple boundaries
Hello /u/roynikk,
Your post was removed for the following reason(s):
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include details about the involved parties including ages, genders, and length of relationship, and
request advice in real situations involving two or more people
We are enforcing the two rules listed above by making all titles start with ages/genders in the following format:
[##X][##X], [## X][## X], or [##-X][##-X] where ## is the age and X is the gender (currently M, F, T, A, NB, FTM, MTF but more can be added). You can have more than two ages/genders listed, but you must have at least two at the beginning of your title. Here is an example:
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ya i dont wanna hurt. i will just not respond to his texts.
All any sane person could say here is “please be joking”.
For me, this is an instant “pack your shit” moment
I do cam modeling. I also work a normal job and go to college. I have 3 kids to support. I hid it from my bf at first becuase I myself wasn't comfortable with it. I had to adjust. I felt like I had to do it. I was behind on the mortgage and very scared. I told him and he was ok with it. He said he understood why i am doing it and knows i truly love him. If you aren't ok with it then end things. Simple as that. I guess I got lucky.
If I asked my friend to pick up my car and they got in an accident I’d pay for the damage myself.
If OP were drunk or being reckless that’s own thing but accidents happen and this one happened while doing a favor for the friend. At the very least the bill should be split.
This is bad news. He wants to do the sex with you.
If he promises you there will be separate beds, there will likely later be some “mix up” and the room will have only one bed. You'll be stuck 2-3 hours from home with no where else to stay and your options then will not be good.
Just forget this “opportunity” and pretend he never offered it.
You need to find a way to accept what he has to offer. I you can't be happy with limited attention, this isn't the right person for you to be in a relationship with. You cannot change the fundamental parts of a person's personality and you shouldn't try. It will just make you both miserable.
And you agreed to marry this?
Great news then, good luck!
Super weird. He is either a narcissist that really believes all women are after him or he is trying to make you jealous.
Yes! I wish I had an award bc this is the only response that gets it.
We can’t say why he’s being cruel, but it doesn’t really matter. Ultimately he’s intentionally hurting OP, and that’s unacceptable treatment from someone who professes to love you.
spoken like someone who's never been a designated driver.
why can't it be both?
this is the “he was asking for it” argument.
You're focusing on the wrong thing.
Leave his sexuality on the floor and focus on the fact that he's spent the entire marriage cheating on you. Who cares what kind of genitals he was cheating on you with, cheating is cheating.
It's not natural if you're invading someone's privacy and shouldn't be excused or suggested.
You genuinely think not telling your wife … is gonna be smooth sailing?
I’m guessing you thankfully don’t suffer from depression. It’s not that you’re demanding it’s that you don’t fully understand what she’s going through. If you want to do something try engaging her and how’s she managing her depression. Is she talking to anybody? Is she going to therapy? Is she taking antidepressants? You could try to incorporate healthy habits when you are with her like instead of watching a movie going out for a walk.
Her behavior right now is self destructive so there’s little to no room to be there for you.
I think termination is the best choice, but I can also understand why you're sad. Look into support groups for TFMR as that is certainly part of the reason for this decision given GF health issues. I think therapy for you is a good idea too.
Reading through some of your other comments and posts, and yeah, really does just seem like she’s just enjoying the attention and probably doesn’t mean anything by it. Maybe some small chance she could have a one off night with you, but most likely she just really likes you as a person, enjoys the attention, and it probably feels safe for her to do in a way that may not be as safe feeling doing with a guy she knew was into her. Everyone likes compliments, and it’s nice to feel desirable, and she may just be sorta basking in that for a moment.
Considering that she seems to have leveled with you about the possibilities and you stuck around, I can’t exactly blame her or say she’s the bad guy here, but you may want to have a bit of a talk about it. Or, you know, enjoy the view while it lasts. It’s really going to be about how well you can deal with it going forward.
and spammed for the 7th time today? OCD troll/spammed confirmed..get some professional help. edit: guess we will just have to wait about 5 min for your next spam post since this one is deleted and about 2 min away from being removed(go ahead and fire up another new account)
since you like spamming..here us a spammed reply tone of your. hundreds of old trolling attempts
Don't even tell the parents until after the wedding. You don't need more stress now.
I never took my husbands' surnames when I married. I've always just been me. This is more common among professional women, though not universally. Anyway, you and your partner can do whatever you want. The families will just have to adapt.
I don’t think it’s a reflection of our relationship I think it’s more so that I have rlly bad anxiety
Aside from her bringing up another story about her ex, which you have stated you don’t like and is a perfectly reasonable boundary, I don’t see anything wrong here. You sound majorly insecure and to be honest so does she. It sounds like you just want a reason to be super jealous and are overthinking everything.
I never asked my now husband how much he made. Ever. He was comfortable and that's all I ever needed to know.
Her behavior is gross and manipulative and so materialistic. Be glad she has left. You dodged a huge bullet.
Dude, you just posted about going on a family vacation. I You cant vacation with corpses. Stop lying about the living being dead. Death isnt a joke. You grannie didnt reserect unless we are in a zombie apocalypse. But just in case I'll phone the Ghost Busters.
The problems you’re causing are likely the arguments she’s instigating with her own man after she accuses him of looking at you. My advice is to enjoy modesty day at the Amish Institute of Fashion and just quietly allow her to fuck up her relationships without any direct involvement from you.
Is there a dress code? Other than seeing a person freezing in the cold or exposing their perineum, how do clothes cause upset? She behaving like you’re wearing swas tickas.
You can tell him, “love isn’t enough for relationships to work. Moral alignment is one more component. Respect and communication are others too. Obviously we’re missing at least 3 of them.”
One thing I will give both of us is that we’ve always maintained a really respectful relationship towards each other in front of our kids. He has my back and I have his as parents, now as partner’s completely different story. I hope that if he chooses to go he will become the best version of himself which will make him a better father.
Why do you even have the video?? Like genuinely curious how you can say you love your current gf if you have sex tapes of of your ex blowing you still ?
That you know of. He could be processing something major right now and not feel able to communicate what’s happening.
Ultimatum time. Me or him. That’s all. You know what to do if they choose him.
Wish I could upvote this x100